Does God speak of this exactly, somewhere in the Bible? Of handicaps? I want to read. Not being mean or something, but I want to know scriptures and such so I can see what God thinks of the situation.
Hello friend, May I call you friend? The reason I call you friend is that we are both acquainted with BAD. I would gather you are very well versed on your disorder as well.
I was a full bible believing fundamental Christian when I became ‘unwell’, having to be hospitalised in an institution for my safety and the safety of others. Experiencing mania is something I can live without. Having mood fluctuations has been a constant battle of the mind. Having the Word and standing on it has relieved many, many fears and I am now at peace. It did not happen overnight as much as I had wished and prayed fervently for it to be so.
As Saul faced his
demons I have had to face mine also. Believing on Jesus Christ as the answer and the cure was my driving force to become well again. I am fortunate to have an understanding family support network around me. When I say ‘well’ I mean the voices in my head abate and have that inner peace within my soul.
Being fundamental only gave me the conclusion I must be possessed with evil spirits. Everything related to being in God’s camp or you weren’t. I was very confused because I thought being born again meant you were free from the malady that presented itself before me. So I sought out the bible with vigour to find freedom.
I hope you don’t mind me sharing part of my story. You have a couple of questions and after praying felt the Lord advise me to share part of my recovery.
I sought help from professionals and pastors to try and find the answers I was looking for. I read the bible a great deal and prayed all the time for God to remove this burden from me. It was not forthcoming so once again I thought I must not be a Christian-only lip service to Him. I even thought I wanted God for the wrong reasons and that is why freedom did not come. I was always chasing something. For many years I had wrong thinking patterns which led to delusional states concerning the Kingdom of God. My sins were forgiven so why did He not remove everything from me.
There was a distinct line in my thinking and reasoning regarding the voice of God and the voices I was hearing in my head. I had bad theology which lead to an almost fantasy Christianity. I was always looking for God to do something for ME. Not once did I doubt the sovereignty of God but wondered why I had to suffer the way I did. Nothing was counted as joy in my suffering.
In reading the apostle’s words of their suffering I began to understand that to live is to experience suffering; it is how we deal with it that matters. To not suffer is to live in a fantasy land. I lived in denial for a number of years regarding my Bi-Polar. I had not come to terms with it. Once I began to see that to be whole I had to accept me as I am and begin to see me as Christ sees me. My imperfections were made perfect in God’s sight and it lessened the severity of my understanding of pain and torment and the confusion I had regarding my illness. God began to work wonders in my life since I stopped having an ulterior motive to love God.
Two parts of Scripture were of benefit to me and are still dear to me now.
[2 Tim 1:7] For God did not give us a spirit of fear but rather of power and love and self-control.
The fear relates to my inward thoughts, the power meant I was given the right to do so, the self-control was regarding my moods. I am still a work in progress and am not perfect but allowing this verse to sink in changed my thoughts indicating I was in control.
Finally, as Jesus read from Isaiah the words were like salve for the soul. I had read and heard this portion of scripture a hundred times and this time it hit a chord with me. I will finish with it. [Luke 4:18] "The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he has anointed me to bring glad tidings to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim liberty to captives and recovery of sight to the blind, to let the oppressed go free”.
This verse was prophesised 16 years ago for my life before I became unwell
I was poor in spirit, He released my chains of the mind, I could now see and understand the real Gospel rather than the illusionary one, and finally set me from my past which affected me greatly.
I know this is long and apologise in advance if this has been a bore and too long winded and if I am wrong then I also apologise. I tried to keep it as short as possible as I don’t post much in these forums. My Bi-Polar is still present but God’s Presence and Spirit help keep me grounded which was always what I wanted.
Peace be with you & God Bless you in your own search.
