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Advice

Soul Language

Member
Joined
Aug 23, 2009
Messages
25
Im currently living at a homeless shelter and none of my family chooses to talk to me. When I was 18 years old I was kicked out of my house and when i was 19 and homeless they would only let me live there if I would sign up for the army, so I opted out of that. Now I admit that I have had some drug problems over the course of about 10 years and recently i have been trying to change. This time I have been attending AA meetings and have asked Jesus to come into my life.

I have some feelings of anger towards my "christian" mother. I have had a history of drug problems and I have just recently found out that my step dad of 18 years smokes pot and that my mother allows it. My real father has never been around so I was adopted by my step father when I was 8 years old who has never even been a father to me. He never has cared and to this day he is the most selfish person I have met. There has never been a relationship and for the past 10 years all we say to each other is Hi and Bye when I would stop by mothers house to visit.

A couple months ago I landed a 16 dollar an hour job and I went over to my moms house to watch a movie with them and he comes in reeking like marjiuna which fueled my addiction into a relapse and I lost my job on monday because I used meth. I couldnt handle the anger and to this day I still cant.

This is real hard to get at.. I guess Im trying to say is I feel that my mom chooses my step dad over everyone including jesus and it angers me alot. My step dad only cares about himself and his material possessions. He has always been very mean and I have been in many disputes with him. I believe that he hates me and only cares about his life with my mom and all their "money" and how they r gonna spend it. He doesnt even work and if it wasnt for my mom he wouldnt have what he has today. My mom has just recently started going to church last year, but she is still going by herself and has not gotten active or met any new friends. Now she probably only goes twice a month and has been very active with my step father and thier motorcyle traveling from bar to bar on thier **** poker runs. She hangs out with all his partying friends and I sense that she is developing a sense of pride in her social life.. "trying to be cool".

She says that my step dad can smoke pot because "we hold jobs". What job? He has been unemployed for 7 months and even if he did hold a job it i dont think it is ok to smoke pot. it is an idol

I shouldnt judge my mom but she "justifies" alot claiming she holds a job and is a good person and her husband the same saying "Some people dont need to go to church" And bla bla..

I know I shouldnt judge people as the bible says.. Am I wrong to be scared for my mother that she might miss out on jesus if she continues to follow her unbelieving husband? And i know the scripture says that u must forgive in order to be forgiven.. And honor thy mother and father... but my parents just are not relgious my mom goes to church but they drink and party all the time any advice would be helpful.
 
My friend, do not worry about your Mom's life so much until you are on your one feet. You should be able to get help doing that through Teen Challenge or a similar ministry. Talk to a few local Pastor's and tell them you want to get your life right with God and get a new direction. They should be able to point you in the right direction and offer some assistance. You will be in my prayers.
 
Now I admit that I have had some drug problems over the course of about 10 years and recently i have been trying to change. This time I have been attending AA meetings and have asked Jesus to come into my life.

I'm a recovering alcoholic (I've been in AA more than twenty years). I believe the AA program works IF you work it. AA lays out tools for you to use to have a clean and sober life, but you have to use them.

and he comes in reeking like marjiuna which fueled my addiction into a relapse and I lost my job on monday because I used meth. I couldnt handle the anger and to this day I still cant.

You used meth because you're a practicing druggie, not because you lost your job or you are angry. Alcoholics run to alcohol, druggies run to drugs. Step #1 of the 12 steps challenges us to admit our powerlessness over our addiction. We need to do that every day. God won't reach out and pluck you out of your addiction, but, He will walk you through it.

I'm willing to help you any way I can. Feel free to p.m. me.

Spirit Led Ed (SLE)
 
Dear Soul Language
I am of the opinion, that only God can save anyone from themselves and if that
person WANTS to be saved.
My advice is that you pray for your mother to be saved and GOD is big enough
and powerful enough to take her under His wings.
Also pray and ask God to forgive your stepfather, you forgive him also and
ask God to bless him. I am saying here that it may be hard for you to pray
for him, so you can use the same exact words that I have said here, directly
to God.
See, when I find it difficult to pray for my enemies or people I dont like and
we all have those in our life, I use the words " God bless ........[particular person]
thats all I say but I try my best to ask God to bless them and mean it.
However, meaning it takes a while but I strive to mean what I ask as I go
along.

Lizabe
 
I feel much anger from your post. I take it you have struggled with drugs and drinking for many years. Since you have been homeless twice once at 18 and now I am feeling that you haven't been able to stay sober. Your parents most likely are trying not to enable your addiction with tough love. Which isn't easy for them. But none the less, you have to get through your anger in order to fully be in recovery. I agree Teen Challenge would be a great program for you to enter as 10 years of addiction will require much more than a limited treatment center. Please seek help before it is too late.
 
It will take time to forgive them,I know what it is like . I always think of the fact that I make mistakes against others and I know God forgives me. Focus on yourself and your wholeness, and if your family brings you anger the best thing to remember is to let it bounce off of you. Also, It is wonderful and a big accomplishment that you are making the desicion to sober up. It is not easy to discontinue the addiction, but you can do it , take it a step , a day , a sec at a time, you will overcome because you have Jesus in your heart and he will provide the grace, love and strength. Don't look at your past, this is a new day a new life, I believe that God wants you to be whole and happy. Get into a good christian non-profit rehab progra like (teen challange) where they offer substance abuse support. You are not alone but the lord is always with you , he promised to never leave nor forsake you.
Be blessed and don't give up. Keep your eyes on YOUR path and your future.
 
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