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Affair with a priest!!

GraceofJesus

Member
Joined
Jun 16, 2009
Messages
6
So this is a weird issue I'm going through. I will not include all the details, but I will give you a general idea. I know this girl and her family, and they're Catholic. There is a priest at their church who is basically a friend of the family, and they trust him highly. He visits them, and they respect him, they go to confession to him (at least the daughters do), etc.

Anyway, so recently I have come to find out that this priest and one of their daughters, have secretly started dating and seeing each other. So this is a secret from her family of course. The priest is 20 years her senior, she's only 22. He is betraying the trust of her family,and he is betraying the trust of God in him as a priest, and of his position in the church and to it's people.

Ever since I found out, this has tortured me as no one knows I know of it. Only the girl and the priest know, but they are unaware that I do.

And I'm conflicted. I mean it's wrong on so many levels. He is lying to his duties as a priest, and to her family as they don't know either. Sometimes he visits their house, pretending to see them when he is only there to make sure she's home (he is highly jealous). I don't know what to do. At the same time it's not my business and I can't just tell her family. I want to tell her to wise up, but I don't know about that either.

On one hand, they're both adults and are aware (or should be) of the mistakes they are making. The priest more so than the young girl. On the other hand, such grave sin in church has to be revealed as it will infect the church and others.

I am conflicted.
 
Dear Brother.

It is really bad that One prist is doing like this. That he is keep the affair with girl who is memenber of his church. Frist I want to clear this point why youth are ready to joint become the prist unless they have born newlife?

I think this Prist did not know the JESUS christ and his commend, he had joint this job for money purpose Only Not for christ.

This Catholic mesionry are not serious about JESUS Christ.

About that girls she is at age of 22 how could she except his purpose.

Only think we can do that is Prayer for both .

Anthony.
 
So this is a weird issue I'm going through.

I mean it's wrong on so many levels. He is lying to his duties as a priest, and to her family as they don't know either. Sometimes he visits their house, pretending to see them when he is only there to make sure she's home (he is highly jealous). I don't know what to do. At the same time it's not my business and I can't just tell her family. I want to tell her to wise up, but I don't know about that either.

On one hand, they're both adults and are aware (or should be) of the mistakes they are making. The priest more so than the young girl. On the other hand, such grave sin in church has to be revealed as it will infect the church and others.

I am conflicted.

Dear conflicted,

Hhmmm... this is a problem.

It may not be a grave sin, unless you know they've crossed a moral line your certain is
against scripture. (I don't mean the church bylaws)


But I must agree with you conflicted, it needs to be addressed if your sure about this hiding.
That speaks for itself, now doesnt it.

Perhaps you could send a letter to whoever you feel is best to contact.
Someone at the church maybe, or even to the families father.

Make it descrete in context. Don't put a return address on the envelope. Disguise your writing even, if you feel you must.

This is about exposing what is hidden.
Just like Adam hiding himself.. except he wasn't 20 years older than Eve.


What do ya think? This is simply about doing what's right. Cut and dry.

God bless you with wisdom,
Marco
 
St.paul's laugh

St.Paul saw the coming of a fake christianity advocating for the abstinence from certain foods and from marriage!

St.Paul recognised that not all people have been called to celibacy.The problem with the catholic church is that service to the church in the serious commitment witnessed by priests can only be done by celibate people.

So the couple you speak of can only be in sin before God if they have had sex before marriage.The priest guy should know that he cannot eat his cake( with the fruits of fornication) and have it too!

Coming out would mean he quits the priesthood, which is why the secrecy is going on.

This is something that you might need to discuss with the two of them, coz perhaps they are genuinely in love.
 
This is something that you might need to discuss with the two of them, coz perhaps they are genuinely in love.


I very much do not suggest this.

Sometimes you just never know about people. They could turn on you and make you out to look like one who falsely accuses. If they're hiding it, they may not want it discovered. Your word against theirs is how this could go, and you'd be on the outs with many. The priest has a certain innate power that comes with the position. Only go to him with another witness (another who has 1st hand knowlege of the situation, and not one who'll simply back up your word because "they know you"..


LoJ
 
So this is a weird issue I'm going through. I will not include all the details, but I will give you a general idea. I know this girl and her family, and they're Catholic. There is a priest at their church who is basically a friend of the family, and they trust him highly. He visits them, and they respect him, they go to confession to him (at least the daughters do), etc.

Anyway, so recently I have come to find out that this priest and one of their daughters, have secretly started dating and seeing each other. So this is a secret from her family of course. The priest is 20 years her senior, she's only 22. He is betraying the trust of her family,and he is betraying the trust of God in him as a priest, and of his position in the church and to it's people.

Ever since I found out, this has tortured me as no one knows I know of it. Only the girl and the priest know, but they are unaware that I do.

And I'm conflicted. I mean it's wrong on so many levels. He is lying to his duties as a priest, and to her family as they don't know either. Sometimes he visits their house, pretending to see them when he is only there to make sure she's home (he is highly jealous). I don't know what to do. At the same time it's not my business and I can't just tell her family. I want to tell her to wise up, but I don't know about that either.

On one hand, they're both adults and are aware (or should be) of the mistakes they are making. The priest more so than the young girl. On the other hand, such grave sin in church has to be revealed as it will infect the church and others.

I am conflicted.

Read the King James Bible You have so many issues that G-d can help you with.Your friend's problem is solved in the first book of the bible 27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.28 And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.(Genesis 1:27-28)The teaching of priest not to marry is wrong it is a legalistic Roman Catholic tradition not God's commanded word.(Colossians 2:8)Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ.You should ask Jesus Christ and G-d to reveal themselves to you through the King James Bible not the Roman Catholic or Catholic prints.Also here are some quick simplfied reads for you that puts it in a different format.Google Chick publications these are the reads I suggest for you."Alberto" The testimony of a former Jesuit Priest. Learn how this ex-Jesuit priest found Christ and begins to expose Rome's innermost secrets. Double Cross" After his salvation, Alberto is a hunted man. No Jesuit can leave his order alive! He reveals the infiltration of Protestant organizations, and warns of false "brethren" in our midst.The Godfathers" Part III of Alberto Rivera's testimony. Here's how the Roman Catholic Institution, as the "Mother of Abominations" (Rev. 17), caused many wars. This is the book the Catholic press is afraid to mention. If you are a Catholic, or have Catholic friends or loved ones, this story is for you.The Force" how the Vatican is using its occult force to deceive millions. It's the "habitation of devils" described in Rev. 18:2.The Prophet" Part VI of Alberto Rivera's testimony. Learn how the papacy helped start Islam, only to have this new daughter rebel against her. You'll understand the Arab's place in Bible prophecy. Go ahead what do yo have to loose read these things along with the king James Bible I dare You if Iam wrong I will admit it.Praying for you to seek and find the truth as G-d knows it.
 
Dear freedongrace,
You wrote in reply --- I suggest for you."Alberto" The testimony of a former Jesuit Priest. Learn how this ex-Jesuit priest found Christ and begins to expose Rome's innermost secrets. Double Cross" After his salvation, Alberto is a hunted man. No Jesuit can leave his order alive! He reveals the infiltration of Protestant organizations, and warns of false "brethren" in our midst.The Godfathers" Part III of Alberto Rivera's testimony.---

I am totally encourage by your back bone to tell the truth and yes the catholic church has lead billions to a Christless eternity. I am not a supporter in anyway form or fashion of the catholic church and yes I would state the catholic church is the GREAT BABYLON.
But have you read ENCYCLICAL MIT BRENNENDER SORGE, this flies in contrast to ALBERTO's testimony on a lot of issues, the suggestion of this COMIC BOOK makes it like that all people within this bad corrupt system collaborators of the third reich and that they are closed to the WORD OF G-D, do not forget that Alberto's quest for himself was to find the truth. Also remember he was only 4 or 5 years old in 1945. I myself have contacted Jack Chic, who read the ENCYCLICAL MIT BRENNENDER SORGE and was grateful and thankful that I brought this to his attention. This Comic Book in my opinion presents to a Born Again Christian a negative diffence in sharing the Gospel with Catholics, people who need the Lord, as dark grusome people who are evil conspiritors. Are we not lamps on a hill? Is not Christ risen from the dead? We know that He is!!
The reason I state these things is because my father was trained by Benicdictine Monastery Monks in 1919 this would be Catholic creme decor, he died without professing the Lord Jesus Christ. And our family is supposedly related to the Pope who I found out wrote the ENCYCLICAL I spoke about. And any time I saw or heard Born Again believers talking with Catholics, who needed the truth, they were sharing about the corrupt system they were in that they should come out BUT NOT about the saving power of my sweet risen savior The Lord Jesus Christ who died on the cross out of the Fathers will. They never spoke about the power of God's love to save them. They never spoke about the Lord Jesus who is the only way and the truth and the life. They never spoke about the reason why the Lord Jesus went to the cross. They never shared that our sins separate us from God who is Holy. Most if not all the times I heard Born Again Christians, which I am by God's grace, speak to Catholics about was to leave the corrupt Catholic system. Yes the system should be left but where's the Gospel? It is muted because the volition of the believer is stigmitised by the COMIC strip Alberto which gives a slant on the intention of many individuals who are searching for God but have not heard the Gospel who are in the Catholic chuch the great Babylon.
Ps. because I am Italiain, I have been saved, Born Again and preaching for about thirty years (you can check out my homepage on my avatar), half the time I go to a Born Again Christian group for the fiirst time the discussion usually comes around to why Catholics are wrong and never about how to win the lost Catholic to Christ! Or not even prayer for these people. Is this not amazing?
So I end with a prayer "Dear Father I pray for everyone who is spiritually blind that need your love that you would open their eyes to the truth and power of who you are through your son the Lord Jesus Christ who rosed from the dead for everyones behalf so that we may have a relationship with you through him. In the name of your son Jesus do I pray"

Ps. Ps. Just in case MIT BRENNENDER SORGE is the Pope in 1937 100% speaking out against Hitler. I know it sounds like its a Pastor saying most of it but yes it was the Pope!
 
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Dear freedongrace,
You wrote in reply --- I suggest for you."Alberto" The testimony of a former Jesuit Priest. Learn how this ex-Jesuit priest found Christ and begins to expose Rome's innermost secrets. Double Cross" After his salvation, Alberto is a hunted man. No Jesuit can leave his order alive! He reveals the infiltration of Protestant organizations, and warns of false "brethren" in our midst.The Godfathers" Part III of Alberto Rivera's testimony.---

I am totally encourage by your back bone to tell the truth and yes the catholic church has lead billions to a Christless eternity. I am not a supporter in anyway form or fashion of the catholic church and yes I would state the catholic church is the GREAT BABYLON.
But have you read ENCYCLICAL MIT BRENNENDER SORGE, this flies in contrast to ALBERTO's testimony on a lot of issues, the suggestion of this COMIC BOOK makes it like that all people within this bad corrupt system collaborators of the third reich and that they are closed to the WORD OF G-D, do not forget that Alberto's quest for himself was to find the truth. Also remember he was only 4 or 5 years old in 1945. I myself have contacted Jack Chic, who read the ENCYCLICAL MIT BRENNENDER SORGE and was grateful and thankful that I brought this to his attention. This Comic Book in my opinion presents to a Born Again Christian a negative diffence in sharing the Gospel with Catholics, people who need the Lord, as dark grusome people who are evil conspiritors. Are we not lamps on a hill? Is not Christ risen from the dead? We know that He is!!
The reason I state these things is because my father was trained by Benicdictine Monastery Monks in 1919 this would be Catholic creme decor, he died without professing the Lord Jesus Christ. And our family is supposedly related to the Pope who I found out wrote the ENCYCLICAL I spoke about. And any time I saw or heard Born Again believers talking with Catholics, who needed the truth, they were sharing about the corrupt system they were in that they should come out BUT NOT about the saving power of my sweet risen savior The Lord Jesus Christ who died on the cross out of the Fathers will. They never spoke about the power of God's love to save them. They never spoke about the Lord Jesus who is the only way and the truth and the life. They never spoke about the reason why the Lord Jesus went to the cross. They never shared that our sins separate us from God who is Holy. Most if not all the times I heard Born Again Christians, which I am by God's grace, speak to Catholics about was to leave the corrupt Catholic system. Yes the system should be left but where's the Gospel? It is muted because the volition of the believer is stigmitised by the COMIC strip Alberto which gives a slant on the intention of many individuals who are searching for God but have not heard the Gospel who are in the Catholic chuch the great Babylon.
Ps. because I am Italiain, I have been saved, Born Again and preaching for about thirty years (you can check out my homepage on my avatar), half the time I go to a Born Again Christian group for the fiirst time the discussion usually comes around to why Catholics are wrong and never about how to win the lost Catholic to Christ! Or not even prayer for these people. Is this not amazing?
So I end with a prayer "Dear Father I pray for everyone who is spiritually blind that need your love that you would open their eyes to the truth and power of who you are through your son the Lord Jesus Christ who rosed from the dead for everyones behalf so that we may have a relationship with you through him. In the name of your son Jesus do I pray"

Ps. Ps. Just in case MIT BRENNENDER SORGE is the Pope in 1937 100% speaking out against Hitler. I know it sounds like its a Pastor saying most of it but yes it was the Pope!

Good info on MIT BRENNENDER SORGE thanks for the info he does sound like a preacher man . You are a inspirational person.I do love and care about every soul Christ died for all men,women,children. We are all saved by Grace. I am not any better than anyone else. I know G-d is no respector of persons he loves everyone the same.We all are sinners and must come to repentance.Okay guys intead of Chick Publicaions pick up King James Bible read Matthew,Mark,Luke,John then move onto Romans pray before reading ask the Lord to reveal himself to you.

It is like any religion they all have bad seeds the last pope that died John Paul II was exact opposite from MIT BRENNENDER SORGE is the Pope in 1937 100% speaking out against Hitler.

1940's John Paul II a employee for Farben Chemical Company a salesman sold cynanide to Nazi's for extermnation of jews in Auschwitz he also worked as a chemist and manufactured posion gas to destroy jewish and christian people.
 
Okay, I've see there are a few replies, so I'll try to respond to everyone. First let me share what else I have learned.

I know now for a fact, that the priest and the girl have a sexual relationship, and have had sex.
Now here's the worst part, I also found out that the priest is sleeping with another older woman, who has a kid. He is keeping both women a secret from each other. I am certain 100% of all of this. I find it despicable how low a priest such as this man can stoop. He lies to the woman, he lies to the other girl's family as he is their priest, and he abuses his position in the church.

Brother Anthony, I have been praying for the girl. Not so much for the priest, especially after what I have learned today.

Brother Marco, I agree with you, such grave sin in church must be exposed. I have tried to contact another priest in that same church, but to no avail through email. I am currently out of town, but I will visit him in person when I am back in town and see what he thinks is the best way to proceed. I also feel horrible for the girl's family, but I'm not sure how to approach them, if at all. Definitely anonymously if I do anything. But I don't want to destroy the girl's life...(more on this in a bit).

rhomphaia, as I stated they have had sex. But also, it is clear the priest is not "in love" but is simply using the girl, given his other relationship. He feeds both women the same lies about love and caring.

Lion_of_Judah, I agree with you, I do not plan to do that. (read on later)

My other brothers/sisters, I appreciate your suggestions, but this is a more pressing matter and I have no time to do outside reading or anything of the sort (as you can see it took me a while to reply to this thread, as I have a more than busy life myself).


But I am concerned about my friend. Her family as well. Now there is this other woman the priest is using. I was thinking of doing two things. Talking to a higher priest in his church, which would not be THAT easy as I would not want him to see me there.

The other thing I want to do, is expose his lies, and let both woman know what is going on, anonymously, so that they are deceived no more by his tricks.

What I mentioned about destroying the girl's life, is how the priest could react if her family knew first, and how they would react to what she has done. I get the impression that she has been brainwashed by this man, and I want to expose him. I just don't think her family is the first place I should go to.
 
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I am certain 100% of all of this. I find it despicable how low a priest such as this man can stoop. He lies to the woman, he lies to the other girl's family as he is their priest, and he abuses his position in the church.

..but I will visit him in person when I am back in town and see what he thinks is the best way to proceed. I also feel horrible for the girl's family, but I'm not sure how to approach them, if at all. Definitely anonymously if I do anything.

Talking to a higher priest in his church, which would not be THAT easy as I would not want him to see me there.

The other thing I want to do, is expose his lies, and let both woman know what is going on, anonymously, so that they are deceived no more by his tricks.

I just don't think her family is the first place I should go to.

Well this is unfortunate.

I strongly suggest before you do anything, that your 110% certain of these things.
Once you start making accusations to those in authority, theres no going back saying ..but but but, but, but.......

Try to keep one thing in mind.. this is unforturnate, but not unusual in human behavior.
This has happened before in church history, ..it'll happen again.
What makes it so painfull, is how close you are to the situation.

You must be very careful in your steps that follow now.

Going to a higher priest is going to be a good idea. I would even suggest meeting with 2 at the same time.
When you talk with them, gaurd yourself from becoming an emotional upheaval of a mountain..

As best your able, in a concise manner, state the facts as you know them.
You'll lend yourself more credibility by not acting like a reality show ;b

As far as damage control is concerned in the situation.. it is, what it is..
No gettin' around it. But, life will go on, time will pass.. and hopefully.. lessons will be learned.

God bless you with wisdom and clarity, Ps 37:23

LoJ
 
I very much do not suggest this.

Sometimes you just never know about people. They could turn on you and make you out to look like one who falsely accuses. If they're hiding it, they may not want it discovered. Your word against theirs is how this could go, and you'd be on the outs with many. The priest has a certain innate power that comes with the position. Only go to him with another witness (another who has 1st hand knowlege of the situation, and not one who'll simply back up your word because "they know you"..


LoJ

I actually agree with this. Approach one or both of them with a witness. I think if that fails, then perhaps even consider going with a witness, to the priest's superior. But...make sure you go with a humble heart. Not just to hit below the belt, but to expose that which you consider to be sinful in the eyes of God.
 
I believe strongly that priests should be allowed to marry; but if what you say is true of this one some of his actions are really unconscienable.

His immoral behavior sets such a bad example to the flock and to those who are still being healed of the pain the pedophile scandal caused. Unfortunately this happens in other denominations also where a married pastor will have an affair with a secretary or someone in the congregation. Confrontation is needed but it should not be done without much prayer before.. Surely help and guidance from those persons accountable for the oversight of this priest is needed.

prayers...
 
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Well, I'm having second thoughts. First of all, I don't want to go to a higher priest in person. To be honest what this guy is doing is insane on his part, and highly risky, and I'm starting to think it might put me in danger to go against him.

He's often in the church at the same time as the other priest, and there's no telling for me when he's not there, so I can't risk it. I can try getting the other priest's number and contacting him in person...

Although I suspect he will want to denounce the offending priest. What I'm worried about now is the girl and her family. I don't want to ruin her life. I'm not saying she's not at fault, as she is an adult and should know what she's getting herself into, but I feel she is less at fault given her age, and people in love are blind as they say, plus her trust of him due to her confessing to him previously, it's probably hard for her to have imagined this whole mess going on behind the scenes.

What I am thinking to do now, is anonymously warn the girl. Let her know what the priest has been up to, let her see for her own eyes, and hopefully she could come to her senses if that's possible. I want to somewhat remove her from the issue to have her receive the least harm.

I mean, her family is extremely catholic. So for them to find out their daughter has been having a sexual relationship, and not only that but one with a 40 year old priest that they regard highly and trust....I just don't see that ending well at all for anyone. I can't imagine what her father might do, her sisters, the reactions,....

That's why I want her to know first, and then to go to a higher priest so that the church could handle this. The priest is in the States on some sort of study VISA I think, for scholarly work (I might be wrong). This will probably impact his status once he is denounced, that's my guess.

I don't know. I need to sleep on this a few more nights.
 
Well I can't disagree with you about the power stuff and you being at play in the whole thing.

Let the girl know somehow (anonymously.. which means not by email either) about the other women, and suggest she asks the other women herself.


That's my $.02


Good luck, and God bless you with wisdom once again,
LoJ
 
How is email not anonymous? I'll just make a random account that doesn't reveal my identity. I can't exactly send her a letter. I think an anonymous email is the safest.

So, I'll let you guys know how it goes. I will do it fairly soon I guess.
 
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