As a Husband...What do I do?

[billyeah]

My wife is often concerned about our finances. We live in Northern Alberta where expenses are high. It is tough to get by, and we have had dual income for the first three years of our marriage so it hasn't been a problem.

Flash forward to now and my wife is pregnant (yeah!!) but we lost our extra income (boo!!) Now we can survive on my income, it hasn't been a problem. We have just enough cash to not go in the red, basically paycheck to paycheck. (don't a lot of people?)

Here is where the problem lies: I am not concerned. I have learned to give it up to the lord and am confident that we will not end up on the street, and even if we did and have to move into some lower cost housing, I wouldn't care, in fact I would like to.

My wife on he other hand, is concerned. She is constantly checking our balance, see when this payment comes out, that payment, she feels guilty for buying groceries! When ever we talk about it it ends up as a fight because she thinks I don't care because I have such a "whatever happens happens" attitude. I have told her time and time again, I will not let her go hungry. My job is to take care of my family, and I will. I will mow lawns in the evenings if I have to. I just don't think about it. I don't concern myself with it. It is probably one of the least of my worries. How can I show my wife I care about our finances, but just don't want to worry about it. The bible says don't worry, so I won't. How do I keep her happy?

advice?

Thanks

 

[ladylovesJesus]

Bill

Bill, I empathize with you and your wife both. My wife and I are in a financial bind, too, but for different reasons (which I'll not go into). I hope you're not trying to mask your own fear. Fear is real and it's normal, but, I believe that when scripture says "fear not", it means "Don't let fear control you."

I would not talk a great deal about your belief in God's provision, don't try to force it on her. Simply let her be who she is. Pray that God will draw her to Himself and ask Him every morning for guidance in dealing with her. Stand back and watch Him work. You will, in His time, see results.

One thought that keeps surfacing in my mind (it might be just me, but just in case it's from the Lord, I'll pass it on) is that you might want to post Psalm 37:25 in your bedroom where you both can see it.

"Once I was young. Now I am old. Yet I've never seen the righteous forsaken or his children begging bread." (Ps 37:25)

By the way, congratulations on becoming a dad!

SLE

 

[ladylovesJesus]

from Word of Life

billyeah, firstly congratulations on the news that your wife is pregnant.

I am afraid, most of us women do tend to fret and worry about things in life too much, and it’s something we need to overcome. We just tend to be more emotional and worry about the next day, which really doesn't belong to us.

Mat 6:34 Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.

Now is your wife saved, if so she must learn not to worry. It's not easy I know, but she does need to give all her concerns and worries to God and He will provide and take care of you all and your forthcoming arrival, as and when the time arises.

What I would suggest you do in the meantime, as I was in a similar situation as this, where I wasn't working and my husband was and money was tight, I sat down and did a budget, I did several in fact. Everything was put on that budget and we both sat down and went through it. And we had to abide to that budget, there was no other choice. No going over it, as there wasn't any money for luxuries. Meals out, buying nice cloths etc. We just had to buy the bare necessities.

Getting your wife involved is not a bad thing either, just give her a hug and say, things will be fine and keep on reassuring her that God will provide. I know He will, it's just our unbelieving that causes so much problems, in all our areas of our lives.

Mat 6:25 Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment?

Mat 6:30 Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which to day is, and to morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith?

Having that close relationship with God daily will take all these fears, worries and concerns away, which is far more important. I promise you, if you stay close to Him, the worries of this world, won't seem important.

Your wife needs to spend more time in her Bible meditating on scriptures, encourage her to do so, speak to her what God has shown you and go over it together. Divert her mind to God and His word. After a while, things will become clear to her.

I am going to say this too, please don't get yourself into debt, the world is full of it. It's a trap from the devil. Rather go without.

Take care and God bless you.