Bad Relationships

[Metamorphoze]

Hi,
I'm posting on behalf of the rest of my parents as well, so I thought this would be more appropriate in this section. What I would like to know is how to deal with a daughter/sister (18) who is in a relationship with an unbeliever. The person she is with is self-obsessed, controlling, manipultative and has a real mean streak when he doesnt get his own way. He encourages her against her own family and even worse against God. Earlier this year (Feb) we were on the verge of making real progress. After many years of working through her problems she was just starting to embrace Christianity and now this guy has totally unravelled all that was accomplished. Even worse still, they had an abortion mid way through the year. I've been praying for some time, but dont know what to do. She is clinging on to this guy at ALL cost. Time is running out. We will be leaving the country next year, and she wants to stay here with him. If that happens, she is well and truly lost. I feel so frustrated and powerless, I have to endure him everyday. I cant take it anymore. Any help will be gratefully recieved and most appreciated.

kind regards and God bless
Marius

 

[Br. Bear]

Brother Marius,

may I say a couple of things... they may not be what you think you are after, but please consider them anyway.

You have made a statement which is not yours to make.... and perhaps it is from fear and the thought of a negative outcome?
If that happens, she is well and truly lost.

Remember brother, you are not God. I say this in love. We do not know the outcome of another person's life.

You say she is a daughter/sister (18).

If a daughter, well, there comes a time we MUST let go and trust our Lord to be Lord.

I am not an expert in parenting.... but having quite a few youngsters, I have had to learn some lessons like letting go and putting my faith where my faith should be.... not in me and my ability to protect and save my children, but only in the LORD.
Also giving thanks.... and I mean giving honest and heartfelt thanks to Jesus for being my Lord and not just letting me perish as I deserved to.... and then blessing me with so many children and much more..... how can I not be totally thankful and trusting?

We say, Jesus is the Lord ! Praise the Lord !

why ?

do we really mean, THE Lord? of everything ? even everything in our own personal life/lives?


Well, brother... He is.... and we can trust Him..... even with our kin.


Another, if I may, again in love....
I cant take it anymore.

yes, you can, brother Marius. The Lord never gives us more than we can handle... AND, He even is the strength we need and He supplies us with to endure all things He gives us to endure!

I know you can take it, Brother... because you care in love for this soul, and this love is His love, which is endless.

I think what is more tragic is this.... that you would lose touch and peace with the Lord and His comfort, by looking at the circumstances, as unpleasant as they are to look at, and by listening to the horrid and deceitful lies of the enemy of your soul... rather than hearing the reassurance and promise of God given in Christ Jesus to you, by the lover of your soul. Do you understand, my brother?

Please don't think I am judging you nor running you down.... NO WAY !

I have been through all this sort of stuff and more... and have said much more negative stuff than what we are discussing now. So everything I am saying goes for me, too... past, present and future. BUT, I have learnt that what I am saying is true.... only because He has revealed it to my needy heart and soul.

May I suggest the first thing to do is regain your peace and joy in the Lord, first. Then you might just see some miraculous changes come about in these young folk.

Honestly.... we are no good to others if we ourselves are messed up by what we are trying to help them with.



Bless you Marius,
In His Love ><>


Br. Bear

 

[Coconut]

I am not an expert in parenting.... but having quite a few youngsters, I have had to learn some lessons like letting go and putting my faith where my faith should be.... not in me and my ability to protect and save my children, but only in the LORD

amen~ I could`nt have said it better!

If we want our children to walk with God, we must walk with Him first...
thats living breathing walking talking faith and trust in Him.

Prayer still changes things.