Dealing with Singleness

[bamagrad05]

I am a 28 who would like spiritual encouragement on being single. I never had a girlfriend, I have been on dates, I have hung around them. But for the last 4 years, I have really been painfully lonely. I dont want to fret it anymore. I am tired of getting rejection, dont feel like going to nightclubs and chasing women or bars. I just want to learn how to not simply cope with being single, and when I get laughed at for never having a girlfriend and being a virgin. I want to overcome it by being really happy. I dont believe in lying. I am single, and not happy about it. I wish I had a wife and kid.

I know that the Lord can provide all things, but I also know I am extremely shy, I get intimidated by pretty women even when they interested and I flat out dont know hot to talk to women. I just dont know. But, if those things keep me from ever attaining a woman, I just want to know some tips how to be fully happy with my life and content though I desire the warmth and love of a woman!

 

[JCslover]

Hi I wish I knew how to be too,I think I too need advice,Im 34 now and yes i been married before very unhappily to a non christian and been divorced for eight years,i have to cryed myself to sleep,its not any easier not being a virgin because I been absent from relations for over 8 years now,its very lonely in the heart and soul and my body is in want to,i have to be honest.How can I stay pure when God gave us these feelings?I never really met my soulmate my true love though and thats what makes me so sad,yes of course i have christ but we all need human contact and love to,because i want to find that special someone to share my all with life mind heart soul and body its such a beautiful thing,yes i had sex before but i will be honest i feel i never made love and thats the difference,im still hoping and longing for that day to experience gods most beautiful gift,can we please pray for each other?

 

[bamagrad05]

You Made Love

If you were married and had a kid, you were. You found your soulmate because you took those vows to Jesus Christ.

 

[JCslover]

WEll unfortuately i didnt really beacause we got married in a registry office not a church,yes of course them same rules apply,but we didnt really make them before jesus or did I ?He was not really my soulmate,and hes not now we both have very different beliefs and i sinned by marrying a non christian and the bible teaches us not to be unevenly yoked,which i know now and im now will do it Gods way.it wasnt much of a marriage i may of just been single really,i pm you about it as i dont want to share too much in public,I think the one and only good thing i got though was my beautitul son,Jesus truely blest me with him.

 

[for christ]

I am a 28 who would like spiritual encouragement on being single. I never had a girlfriend, I have been on dates, I have hung around them. But for the last 4 years, I have really been painfully lonely. I dont want to fret it anymore. I am tired of getting rejection, dont feel like going to nightclubs and chasing women or bars. I just want to learn how to not simply cope with being single, and when I get laughed at for never having a girlfriend and being a virgin. I want to overcome it by being really happy. I dont believe in lying. I am single, and not happy about it. I wish I had a wife and kid.

I know that the Lord can provide all things, but I also know I am extremely shy, I get intimidated by pretty women even when they interested and I flat out dont know hot to talk to women. I just dont know. But, if those things keep me from ever attaining a woman, I just want to know some tips how to be fully happy with my life and content though I desire the warmth and love of a woman!

hi bamagrad05
I really do understand what pain your in, coz from 2003 I was single, I found it very hard to get a boyfriend , it did upset me alot when I saw happy couples together , no matter where I went I got lie to from people I when to and people made fun of me just coz I was single. but my lifeline was jesus , jesus was the one who stand by me and he stand by me close which help me lot , if it wasn't for jesus being there for me I would of given up and took my own life , ( yes that how bad it was for me back then ) so I will be praying for you , if you need help or someone to talk about being single please feel free to PM me . I will be praying you and you will be in my prays .

 

[sunshineaaks]

I am a 28 who would like spiritual encouragement on being single. I never had a girlfriend, I have been on dates, I have hung around them. But for the last 4 years, I have really been painfully lonely. I dont want to fret it anymore. I am tired of getting rejection, dont feel like going to nightclubs and chasing women or bars. I just want to learn how to not simply cope with being single, and when I get laughed at for never having a girlfriend and being a virgin. I want to overcome it by being really happy. I dont believe in lying. I am single, and not happy about it. I wish I had a wife and kid.

I know that the Lord can provide all things, but I also know I am extremely shy, I get intimidated by pretty women even when they interested and I flat out dont know hot to talk to women. I just dont know. But, if those things keep me from ever attaining a woman, I just want to know some tips how to be fully happy with my life and content though I desire the warmth and love of a woman!

For those who laugh at you for being a virgin, you could simply ask "Which is worse being a virgin or passing the next STD to the next person one sleeps around with? (generally they can't or is it 'won't' answer that question.)

The best way to talk to women is to just be yourself, even if that is shy and you fumble with your words. The right gal will see you for who you really are behind the fumbled words, believe me.

Paul, I think, said it best when he said to be content what ever the circumstances. (Philippians 4:11-13) Being content in any and every situation. He was speaking here of wealth and the lack there of but I believe it includes other situations like singleness and our deepest desires as well.

We can be content through Christ who gives us strength. And in verse 19, God will meet all our needs according to the riches of His glory in Christ. When we are ‘in Christ’ our will means nothing but our desires become His as we bend and yield to His will.

The most important thing you can do at the moment with your single hood is to become more the husband that wife of yours will need. He is molding you, bending and correcting the defects. Painful though it may be at times....

Enjoy the place you are now, and you will be content no matter where you are………..Even…… I dare say…… when you do marry and your wife’s hormones become overpowering for not only her but you as well.

 

[swsavedbygrace]

For those who laugh at you for being a virgin, you could simply ask "Which is worse being a virgin or passing the next STD to the next person one sleeps around with? (generally they can't or is it 'won't' answer that question.)

The best way to talk to women is to just be yourself, even if that is shy and you fumble with your words. The right gal will see you for who you really are behind the fumbled words, believe me.

Paul, I think, said it best when he said to be content what ever the circumstances. (Philippians 4:11-13) Being content in any and every situation. He was speaking here of wealth and the lack there of but I believe it includes other situations like singleness and our deepest desires as well.

We can be content through Christ who gives us strength. And in verse 19, God will meet all our needs according to the riches of His glory in Christ. When we are ‘in Christ’ our will means nothing but our desires become His as we bend and yield to His will.

The most important thing you can do at the moment with your single hood is to become more the husband that wife of yours will need. He is molding you, bending and correcting the defects. Painful though it may be at times....

Enjoy the place you are now, and you will be content no matter where you are………..Even…… I dare say…… when you do marry and your wife’s hormones become overpowering for not only her but you as well.

I have to agree with sunshineaaks!

I can honestly say that I am happy just having God for the rest of my life! And having had what God didn't want for me in the past I've learnt the hard way that I WANT what God has for me. His path and will for me is always better than the one I can try and create.

Start asking God to help you be content .. because you don't know how to. Let Him be the center, let Him fill all those lonely places friend. And when God brings you the woman He has planned for you ... what a blessing and joy it will be! Think of how much more you'll be for her!!

I 100% believe that you, me .. everyone should be completely content in just God before dating/courting happens. (That doesn't mean you won't have times where you still want that relationship/family .. but it won't be something that consumes you.)

Its all good friend!!

 

[The Robster]

Op have you ever asked the Lord to send you a wife? Claim your wife. Its not tough talking to chics. I love women and all but I wouldn't use not having aowman as a reason to be unhappy. Ask the Lord for a woman and ask Him to hrlp you overcome your shyness and then start being bold. Its not easy but you need to start somewhere brother. No reason to be intimidated of women. They're harmless until you marry one or forget their birthday. lol

 

[sunshineaaks]

Op have you ever asked the Lord to send you a wife? Claim your wife. Its not tough talking to chics. I love women and all but I wouldn't use not having aowman as a reason to be unhappy. Ask the Lord for a woman and ask Him to hrlp you overcome your shyness and then start being bold. Its not easy but you need to start somewhere brother. No reason to be intimidated of women. They're harmless until you marry one or forget their birthday. lol

No, no no… we are totally harmless after marriage. We know that our guy will sit dreamy eyed listening to us for hours like he did before marriage! We also know he is not perfect and will forget our birthday or anniversary……………………. once! :shock:




(sorry could not resist...... lol)

 

[The Robster]

No, no no… we are totally harmless after marriage. We know that our guy will sit dreamy eyed listening to us for hours like he did before marriage! We also know he is not perfect and will forget our birthday or anniversary……………………. once! :shock:




(sorry could not resist...... lol)

LOL hahahaha.

 

[IloveJesus92]

She's out there, the Lord will guide you.
Honestly, she will be glad you're a virgin.

 

[shibby_gurl]

I am a 28 who would like spiritual encouragement on being single. I never had a girlfriend, I have been on dates, I have hung around them. But for the last 4 years, I have really been painfully lonely. I dont want to fret it anymore. I am tired of getting rejection, dont feel like going to nightclubs and chasing women or bars. I just want to learn how to not simply cope with being single, and when I get laughed at for never having a girlfriend and being a virgin. I want to overcome it by being really happy. I dont believe in lying. I am single, and not happy about it. I wish I had a wife and kid.

I know that the Lord can provide all things, but I also know I am extremely shy, I get intimidated by pretty women even when they interested and I flat out dont know hot to talk to women. I just dont know. But, if those things keep me from ever attaining a woman, I just want to know some tips how to be fully happy with my life and content though I desire the warmth and love of a woman!

The desire to love and be loved is as human, as normal as it gets. And I fully empathize with the loneliness. But remember when you were a child and on Christmas mornings, you and your siblings wake up to open your gifts? Do you remember the moment when each of you realize that you all had different gifts but were still just as happy with the ones you got?

To my brother in Christ, that is what you have right now. Maybe all your friends are getting married, getting engaged or are in a committed relationship. That's fine. You just got a different gift. That's all. It may not be exactly as what your friends have but nevertheless, being single is truly a gift from God. You have a rare opportunity to serve Him with your undivided attention. You can serve Him well by focusing on your career, by continuing to be a good son and brother, by bettering yourself both mentally, academically and physically, by loving your country, by taking care of the earth. You can serve Him by maintaining your purity as a man of God. And the list goes on.

That is why being single is appropriately called "single-blessedness" because it may be lonely at first but in the end, being single is a blessing in disguise.