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How can I deal with this situation?

RayBan

Member
Joined
Dec 12, 2010
Messages
6
I am a college student, living in the dorms another year because I missed out on an apartment. I am a Junior, and got stuck with three freshman room mates. Everything was fine until they all started smoking weed in the room. It became clear I was not happy about it but as long as it was not in my room I didnt care...Unfortunately they couldnt respect my wishes and decided to smoke in my room. I became very agitated and expressed my anger. They began their little games of talking big behind my back etc. over these last few weeks and have come up with their own little click if you will, between themselves. I have decided to move out to another room where I know I will have no problems. When I came back today I saw that my black board where I had written important errands down that I needed to get done before break was tampered with...upon further inspection I noticed all the obscene gestures and comments, and images written on it....I guess this is where I lost it, I tore it off the wall, and threw it across the room, it shattered and the "clan leader" of my enemy appeared through his door, looking stumped I very colorfully expressed my anger and demanded who did this...he obviously had no idea...I continued with my colorful description of the three and he decided to finally fess up, and challenged me...to punch him...now, while i did blow my top, Im reasonable enough to realize that, my future plans would be ruined if i started a fight (Assault)...I had to refrain...but took a bombardment of (youre a B****..P***y...I would whoop your A**) etc etc etc....Now, im a proud guy....and..Im going to be honest, in much better physical shape, bigger, tougher etc...I KNOW I could easily teach this kid the lesson he deserves...big time...but i cant...and now he will just eat it up and spread his glorifying news of victory to his worthless friends....I was shaking with rage...

Ive thought about some horrible things tonight...I could literally see myself doing...and now im sick....but im not sick because i feel bad about the things ive thought, but because i know i cant do them....in the end i try to tell myself, Ive got to be the best person i can be, and things will work out for me because God is here...but, I cant always convince myself....I WONDER SOMETIMES, WHY I AM IN THE POSITIONS I AM, AND HOW PEOPLE CAN BE SO CRUEL, so ignorant....Knowing I cant do anything about it enrages me, and they take adantage of their free hall pass....

How can I cope with this?! what can I do? how can I ask God to comfort me, while I am so tormented? I wonder sometimes why I feel I can be so unfortunate at times...Someone has truely gotten the better of me tonight..and I feel defeated.
 
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I am a college student, living in the dorms another year because I missed out on an apartment. I am a Junior, and got stuck with three freshman room mates. Everything was fine until they all started smoking weed in the room. It became clear I was not happy about it but as long as it was not in my room I didnt care...Unfortunately they couldnt respect my wishes and decided to smoke in my room. I became very agitated and expressed my anger. They began their little games of talking big behind my back etc. over these last few weeks and have come up with their own little click if you will, between themselves. I have decided to move out to another room where I know I will have no problems. When I came back today I saw that my black board where I had written important errands down that I needed to get done before break was tampered with...upon further inspection I noticed all the obscene gestures and comments, and images written on it....I guess this is where I lost it, I tore it off the wall, and threw it across the room, it shattered and the "clan leader" of my enemy appeared through his door, looking stumped I very colorfully expressed my anger and demanded who did this...he obviously had no idea...I continued with my colorful description of the three and he decided to finally fess up, and challenged me...to punch him...now, while i did blow my top, Im reasonable enough to realize that, my future plans would be ruined if i started a fight (Assault)...I had to refrain...but took a bombardment of (youre a B****..P***y...I would whoop your A**) etc etc etc....Now, im a proud guy....and..Im going to be honest, in much better physical shape, bigger, tougher etc...I KNOW I could easily teach this kid the lesson he deserves...big time...but i cant...and now he will just eat it up and spread his glorifying news of victory to his worthless friends....I was shaking with rage...

Ive thought about some horrible things tonight...I could literally see myself doing...and now im sick....but im not sick because i feel bad about the things ive thought, but because i know i cant do them....in the end i try to tell myself, Ive got to be the best person i can be, and things will work out for me because God is here...but, I cant always convince myself....I WONDER SOMETIMES, WHY I AM IN THE POSITIONS I AM, AND HOW PEOPLE CAN BE SO CRUEL, so ignorant....Knowing I cant do anything about it enrages me, and they take adantage of their free hall pass....

How can I cope with this?! what can I do? how can I ask God to comfort me, while I am so tormented? I wonder sometimes why I feel I can be so unfortunate at times...Someone has truely gotten the better of me tonight..and I feel defeated.

I had a very bad spirit of anger for the last 2 years. God has healed me of it and I have such peace now. The bible says we are not of this world, so try not to worry about the world and what it thinks of us. I'm not saying you should just take whatever is dished out to you, because what your roommates did was ignorant, juvenile and wrong.
Weed will do that to a person.

Ask Jesus to calm your heart and give to you abundantly of His peace and comfort and believe that is what He wants for you. He cares for you and will help you if you lean on Him in faith.

And also remember we all makes mistakes and sin, but our goal is not to become enslaved to sin and fulfill the lusts of the flesh. I will be praying for you.
 
I wouldn't beat yourself up on what happened. It sounds like you did your best to control your emotions and Im sure it was hard to not throw a hit. Just remember your human and it's completely natural to feel the way you did. Also about the whole "why am I always so unfoutunate?" just remember someone will always have it harder then you do and it completely up to you on how you want to make yourself feel.
 
Been praying for you and this morning this was my verse of study and you immediately came to mind.

Philippians 4:13
I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

Reflection
When Paul wrote that he could do all things through Christ, we have to understand it in light of his circumstances. Paul declares that he could find contentment (and even joy) in every situation. Though we may not be in the most desirable place, we should find contentment and joy, knowing that Christ will give us the strength to get through anything.

This letter was written, while he was imprisoned in Rome. Don't let anything get in the way of having the joy of the Lord in your life! Come to find out those that don't know the Lord are completely baffled by this.
I'll be praying for you RayBan.
C4E
 
Thanks guys,

I shouldnt have said im unfortunate, I know im very fortunate in alot of ways...Guess I dont understand why I am put in the situations I am in.... I will admit I have been very "busy" and dont always talk to God, or read his word, I need to strengthen my relationship with Him, and Hopefully things will start to get better, and I can associate myself with a better crowd. I need to make the initiative.
 
All I can say is what I would do.

I would go to the college counselor and the authorities and simply report the drug use. For many reasons, but primarily if you continue to accept and tolerate , you may well become a part of a situation of no fault of your own, be charged with drug use and possession.

If you give a so called friend a ride in your car and he leaves a package of drugs in your car and you are stopped and arrested, the drugs are yours, the burden of proof is upon you to prove otherwise.

If you are going out with friends and they all get drunk and pile in the car and start ripping around, ask the driver to stop, and calmly get out of the car and say.......good bye I will walk home. I actually did that when I was a youngster.

You cannot solve this by yourself....go get help and report the whole thing, out of self preservation if nothing else. By tolerance you become a part of it and by mans law may be viewed as so.

Yea I know....no one likes a informant......buy hey do they like you, do they respect your wishes??

Good decision not to fight with them, as they will turn that against you also, as then you become the assailant and the original situation is hidden by the charge of your senseless assault........yea I know, not senseless,but this is how the world looks at things.

Your education and right to peace is more important than they are. Turning the other cheek only goes so far....then it is called self defense.

Kit
 
Well, I moved out today, in another room now and immediately upon leaving that room I feel so much better, I dont know how to explain it, even when I was in that room by myself, with the others gone, I was still miserable, and mad all the time, I built up a hatred for the others in there, and the environment in general...Its weird how much my mood has changed within an hour. Im so thankful for being out of that room. I went up there to grab something about 30 minutes ago, no ones there (thanksgiving break) and I swear upon opening the door and walking in I had a negative feeling....Im happy its in the past.

Didnt mean to come here and vent, I just didnt have anywhere to turn, or to anyone. When I think about it God, and the Christian community were my last option, I feel bad about that, because I KNOW it should be first. Today I reflected, and feel a major change in my life needs to occur, with letting God and His way steer my actions in life, more than they are presently.

I am making an effort, but it is tough, especially at my age, and my environment (college)
 
It was tough on our Lord. Do you think us being His servants will have it easy? Just remember whatever you may face in this life, you're not alone. Make time, which I'm sure is in short supply with your normal studies, but make time, to read the Bible every day. As you continue to change, you'll continue to get stronger and stronger! Keep in mind if it were easy would it be worth it?
Praying for you.
C4E
Galatians 2:20

P.S. Plus you can always come here and let us know how things are going. We're good at listening and giving out opinions
 
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