It all starting at the beginning of this year, i was going through fine with God's plans that i thought he called me for , had a awesome spirit and energy to pursue what i believe was for me but it was not so. The reason i thought this was what God called me for was because after i prayed about a specific thing. I was getting alot of confirmation, i was getting it from my pastor, from God's word, from quotes that would pop up on my news feed on social media, everything was going so wonderful until something crazy happened. I woke up out of my sleep like around 5.00 am one day....i think it was new years eve morning......... everyone was still asleep and i was the only one that was up. I felt somehow in my spirit that God was calling me to do something at that very moment hence the reason why he woke me up out my bed to do something specific. So i followed thinking it was going to work out because i believe this was God's work but it didn't work out . That's when i started getting angry at God because it was something i really wanted and it was according to God's will, i believe in my heart that i had gotten the confirmation i needed, you know, repetitive messages which is one way that God speaks , over and over again i was getting confirmation in many areas of my life and it all vanished just in one morning. Believe me when i tell you i cried my eyeballs out that day, i thought in my mind like how could God do this to me after everything i've been through, A God that loved me would hurt me this way....i was so angry and from then on my life has went down hill from there.....i still serve God and everything....still worship and pray and read his word but i will never understand why it happened because everything was falling into place in every way and now i believe i lost my faith and in trusting God because what he did was unbelievable, we have spoken so long about this, yes he a reason for why he did it but i will never understand why? and i am not going to question God about it, i'm sure he has a purpose for the why i have in the back of my mind, i just need to wait and see, eventually he will reveal his will for me. But until then i believe i've lost my faith and my purpose i believe i once had.