How to Get Our Elderly Parent to Exercise More When They Do Not Want to At All?

[GodB4Us]

How do we get our elderly parent to exercise more when they do not want to at all and they are getting worse and worse mentally as well as physically?

Do we give up and give it to God or do we make like a drill sergeant just to get them out of that chair to walk & keep them walking?

 

[GodB4Us]

I reckon prayer is the only option.

 

[Admon Mikha'el]

How do we get our elderly parent to exercise more when they do not want to at all and they are getting worse and worse mentally as well as physically?

Do we give up and give it to God or do we make like a drill sergeant just to get them out of that chair to walk & keep them walking?

Change your approach....Instead of trying to make them do it, let them think it's their idea....Forcing it will not work.

 

[GodB4Us]

Change your approach....Instead of trying to make them do it, let them think it's their idea....Forcing it will not work.

Can you give an example, please? Reverse psychology or what?

 

[Admon Mikha'el]

Can you give an example, please? Reverse psychology or what?

Instead of saying "Get off your fat butt and go for a walk" Try saying something like. "Where would you like to walk today?" That sort of thing.. Because a person has dementia, does not mean they are stupid or in any way less intelligent....It simply means they cannot process data very well anymore. Dementia makes a person feel less of themselves.... a formerly independent person will feel resentful of the fact that now they are dependent on others for almost everything. In some dementias, short term memory is gone...in other dementias, long term memory is gone. In all dementias, confusion reigns for the victim...You have to work with that and not force anything. Treat your LO with love and compassion always.

 

[Admon Mikha'el]

Distraction works well too...Your loved one may get all upset about you pushing them to walk. or whatever...Distract them with something then a few minutes later ask they where they want to walk, what they want to eat, or whatever.

 

[GodB4Us]

Thanks for the advise.

He just does not want to get out of that lazy boy chair.

My older brother had e-mailed me and said the same thing about not forcing him, and he was coming over tomorrow to talk with me about it.

So maybe he can assess the situation better visually, but if my folks are keeping something from me like if he was dying from a disease or something for why he is not motivated, then I can understand and let it go.

 

[Admon Mikha'el]

Thanks for the advise.

He just does not want to get out of that lazy boy chair.

My older brother had e-mailed me and said the same thing about not forcing him, and he was coming over tomorrow to talk with me about it.

So maybe he can assess the situation better visually, but if my folks are keeping something from me like if he was dying from a disease or something for why he is not motivated, then I can understand and let it go.

I understand his desire to stay in his chair...It may hurt him to stand up. It hurts me to make my body move...It hurts to stand, to walk, to lay down for more than a few hours at a time...etc. Its just so easy to just sit. Whats wrong with my body that moving hurts so much? Not a thing! It's all the thing in my head...dementia means your brain is dying...things don't work or they don't work right. The muscles stiffen up for no good reason and it hurts to make them move.

 

[Admon Mikha'el]

Thanks for the advise.

He just does not want to get out of that lazy boy chair.

My older brother had e-mailed me and said the same thing about not forcing him, and he was coming over tomorrow to talk with me about it.

So maybe he can assess the situation better visually, but if my folks are keeping something from me like if he was dying from a disease or something for why he is not motivated, then I can understand and let it go.

There is a woman who posts on YouTube named Teepa Snow...Shes super good at helping people deal with people with dementia....You should look her up on there and learn stuff....It'll be a big help to you and to your LO. For a healthy person its sometimes hard to remember that a person with dementia is not demented...

 

[GodB4Us]

I understand his desire to stay in his chair...It may hurt him to stand up. It hurts me to make my body move...It hurts to stand, to walk, to lay down for more than a few hours at a time...etc. Its just so easy to just sit. Whats wrong with my body that moving hurts so much? Not a thing! It's all the thing in my head...dementia means your brain is dying...things don't work or they don't work right. The muscles stiffen up for no good reason and it hurts to make them move.

Okay. Thanks for sharing. He has gotten worse and so he was less and les moving out of that lazy boy chair was why I was concern, but yet at the same time, he had been doing a walk around the house and on a treadmill, but after a doctor's visit, he just seem to quit and so makes me think he got bad news he is not telling me about, and yet he is getting worse mentally and not just physically.

So just another thing I am helpless to do anything about except ask the Lord to help me give it to Him.

 

[Admon Mikha'el]

Okay. Thanks for sharing. He has gotten worse and so he was less and les moving out of that lazy boy chair was why I was concern, but yet at the same time, he had been doing a walk around the house and on a treadmill, but after a doctor's visit, he just seem to quit and so makes me think he got bad news he is not telling me about, and yet he is getting worse mentally and not just physically.

So just another thing I am helpless to do anything about except ask the Lord to help me give it to Him.

May I ask which kind of dementia he has?

 

[GodB4Us]

There is a woman who posts on YouTube named Teepa Snow...Shes super good at helping people deal with people with dementia....You should look her up on there and learn stuff....It'll be a big help to you and to your LO. For a healthy person its sometimes hard to remember that a person with dementia is not demented...

I am not so healthy a person. Suffering from tinnitus in my only good ear which helps me to zone out the voices that I started hearing in high school but eventually got diagnosed as paranoid schizophrenic when people start saying things or behaving as if my thoughts were accessed by others as they are tattle tales to cause them to behave that way for that effect of alienating me. Then I became a diabetic. Then recently I just had neuroendocrine pancreatic cancer surgery and my diabetes went from glipizide and metformin to insulin shots now. And I have heard those that are like me, the nerve damage to my ears, are more susceptible to dementia at an early age than normal people. Yay! Trying to be funny to alleviate my depressing condition, but the Lord is with me and He is taking care of me and so I am thankful for letting me know that & see that He is taking care of me to give the Father thanks in Jesus's name.

Even though, like Paul, I have a desire to depart from this life to go Home where I will be free to love others as others will be free to love me as we are all suppose to in Christ, still let the Father's will be done and not mine..

I doubt my ability to take care of my parents, especially when I see evidence that my enemies that have access to my thoughts have been helping themselves to our house, even during the night. I barred the sliding door and the regular doors from the inside, but I have seen evidence that somehow they are still getting in. And so I pretty much see myself as a worthless person to be taking care of them when my enemies can plan mischiefs and run circles around me where every I go, including at home. My folks are tolerating me and do not believe what I am seeing regardless of the evidence and so... really think my older brother is better suited to take care of them and just trot me off to a group home or something.

Personally hoping the Lord would just take me Home and that would be that. But in the mean time, I ma trusting Him t lead me in the way He wants me to go and trusting Him that if I make a wrong decision, He will direct my footsteps otherwise.

Proverbs 16:9 A man's heart deviseth his way: but the Lord directeth his steps.

I reckon I should trust the Lord to take care of my Dad in directing his steps in taking better care of himself since that is what He is doing in keeping my eyes on Him in going through the every day storms of my life.

Thank you for sharing.

 

[GodB4Us]

May I ask which kind of dementia he has?

If he has any, I do not know of, other than he is forgetting now his routines in what pills to take for his meals. My mother called to arrange for a nurse to visit and show her what to do as I pointed out that it should be written down too. If the Lord wants me to take care of both of them, my mother should have her pills written down too, so I can know when I have to do it for her too as well as for him.

 

[brighthouse98]

To all older people I am 69 myself, do not know if you would consider me as old. lol Keep your mind active!!! I am a gamer as well. Some games! Physical profit little at my age (1 Tim 4:8) I play chess as well. Godliness lies in staying in God's Word on a daily basis for me brothers and sisters! My mind stays fresh and more importantly young! Yours can to!!

 

[Br. Bear]

@GodB4Us

Praying for you and yours

Trust in the LORD


Bless you ....><>

 

[Laeomis]

I am not so healthy a person. Suffering from tinnitus in my only good ear which helps me to zone out the voices that I started hearing in high school but eventually got diagnosed as paranoid schizophrenic when people start saying things or behaving as if my thoughts were accessed by others as they are tattle tales to cause them to behave that way for that effect of alienating me. Then I became a diabetic. Then recently I just had neuroendocrine pancreatic cancer surgery and my diabetes went from glipizide and metformin to insulin shots now. And I have heard those that are like me, the nerve damage to my ears, are more susceptible to dementia at an early age than normal people. Yay! Trying to be funny to alleviate my depressing condition, but the Lord is with me and He is taking care of me and so I am thankful for letting me know that & see that He is taking care of me to give the Father thanks in Jesus's name.

Even though, like Paul, I have a desire to depart from this life to go Home where I will be free to love others as others will be free to love me as we are all suppose to in Christ, still let the Father's will be done and not mine..

I doubt my ability to take care of my parents, especially when I see evidence that my enemies that have access to my thoughts have been helping themselves to our house, even during the night. I barred the sliding door and the regular doors from the inside, but I have seen evidence that somehow they are still getting in. And so I pretty much see myself as a worthless person to be taking care of them when my enemies can plan mischiefs and run circles around me where every I go, including at home. My folks are tolerating me and do not believe what I am seeing regardless of the evidence and so... really think my older brother is better suited to take care of them and just trot me off to a group home or something.

Personally hoping the Lord would just take me Home and that would be that. But in the mean time, I ma trusting Him t lead me in the way He wants me to go and trusting Him that if I make a wrong decision, He will direct my footsteps otherwise.

Proverbs 16:9 A man's heart deviseth his way: but the Lord directeth his steps.

I reckon I should trust the Lord to take care of my Dad in directing his steps in taking better care of himself since that is what He is doing in keeping my eyes on Him in going through the every day storms of my life.

Thank you for sharing.

I honestly am not sure what to do to get your parents to excercise. I would try to convince them with the scriptures somehow to exercise. If that didn't work, then I guess it would be left up to prayer.

As for your own health I would be praying for the Lord to heal you. As for the voices, I don't know. I just read C.S. Lewis's book the Screwtape Letters. This was the first C.S. Lewis book I had read. I enjoyed it. It was about a demonic entity taking orders from its hierarchy to destroy a newly converted Christian from the faith by giving him invisible impulses. C.S. Lewis said it was stressful to put his mind into a state to write the book, and he didn't think his readers or him could have stood another volume.

As for your enemies coming into your house at night. Keep waking up, because you don't know at what hour the Lord is coming as a thief in the night. There are multiple verses of this throughout the New Testament. Some of which we discussed in the other thread.

Revelation 3:1-6

Mark 13:32-37
28 Now learn a parable of the fig tree; When her branch is yet tender, and putteth forth leaves, ye know that summer is near:

29 So ye in like manner, when ye shall see these things come to pass, know that it is nigh, even at the doors.

30 Verily I say unto you, that this generation shall not pass, till all these things be done.

31 Heaven and earth shall pass away: but my words shall not pass away.

32 But of that day and that hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels which are in heaven, neither the Son, but the Father.

33 Take ye heed, watch and pray: for ye know not when the time is.

34 For the Son of Man is as a man taking a far journey, who left his house, and gave authority to his servants, and to every man his work, and commanded the porter to watch.

35 Watch ye therefore: for ye know not when the master of the house cometh, at even, or at midnight, or at the cockcrowing, or in the morning:

36 Lest coming suddenly he find you sleeping.

37 And what I say unto you I say unto all, Watch

 

[GodB4Us]

I honestly am not sure what to do to get your parents to excercise. I would try to convince them with the scriptures somehow to exercise. If that didn't work, then I guess it would be left up to prayer.

Prayer it is. My older brother got my folks some new deck chairs and so that got my Dad to venture out.

As for your own health I would be praying for the Lord to heal you.

Thanks.

As for the voices, I don't know. I just read C.S. Lewis's book the Screwtape Letters. This was the first C.S. Lewis book I had read. I enjoyed it. It was about a demonic entity taking orders from its hierarchy to destroy a newly converted Christian from the faith by giving him invisible impulses. C.S. Lewis said it was stressful to put his mind into a state to write the book, and he didn't think his readers or him could have stood another volume.

The Lord is carrying me through it. His power is made great in my weakness.

As for your enemies coming into your house at night. Keep waking up, because you don't know at what hour the Lord is coming as a thief in the night. There are multiple verses of this throughout the New Testament. Some of which we discussed in the other thread.

Revelation 3:1-6

Mark 13:32-37
28 Now learn a parable of the fig tree; When her branch is yet tender, and putteth forth leaves, ye know that summer is near:

29 So ye in like manner, when ye shall see these things come to pass, know that it is nigh, even at the doors.

30 Verily I say unto you, that this generation shall not pass, till all these things be done.

31 Heaven and earth shall pass away: but my words shall not pass away.

32 But of that day and that hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels which are in heaven, neither the Son, but the Father.

33 Take ye heed, watch and pray: for ye know not when the time is.

34 For the Son of Man is as a man taking a far journey, who left his house, and gave authority to his servants, and to every man his work, and commanded the porter to watch.

35 Watch ye therefore: for ye know not when the master of the house cometh, at even, or at midnight, or at the cockcrowing, or in the morning:

36 Lest coming suddenly he find you sleeping.

37 And what I say unto you I say unto all, Watch

I trust Him as my Good Shepherd & Friend to take care of me as the Father does together with His Son, and I trust Him to have me ready as found abiding in Him & His words as well as being willing to go when He comes as the Bridegroom.

1 Thessalonians 5:3 For when they shall say, Peace and safety; then sudden destruction cometh upon them, as travail upon a woman with child; and they shall not escape.
4 But ye, brethren, are not in darkness, that that day should overtake you as a thief.
5 Ye are all the children of light, and the children of the day: we are not of the night, nor of darkness.
6 Therefore let us not sleep, as do others; but let us watch and be sober.

Psalm 17:15 As for me, I will behold thy face in righteousness: I shall be satisfied, when I awake, with thy likeness.

1 John 3:3 And every man that hath this hope in him purifieth himself, even as he is pure.
8 He that committeth sin is of the devil; for the devil sinneth from the beginning. For this purpose the Son of God was manifested, that he might destroy the works of the devil.

Hebrews 12:1Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us,
2 Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Philippians 1:6 Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:...
11 Being filled with the fruits of righteousness, which are by Jesus Christ, unto the glory and praise of God.

2 Timothy 4:18 And the Lord shall deliver me from every evil work, and will preserve me unto his heavenly kingdom: to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen.

Jude 1:24 Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy,
25 To the only wise God our Saviour, be glory and majesty, dominion and power, both now and ever. Amen.

Thank you for sharing and encouraging me to watch even though He alone helps me to dwell in safety.

Psalm 127:1 Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it: except the Lord keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain.
2 It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved sleep.

 

[Christ4Ever]

How do we get our elderly parent to exercise more when they do not want to at all and they are getting worse and worse mentally as well as physically?

Do we give up and give it to God or do we make like a drill sergeant just to get them out of that chair to walk & keep them walking?

Dear Brother,
Prayer of course is first and foremost. Asking for guidance, and that the Holy Spirit move upon their spirit with a desire to be accommodating to exercising.
Not knowing their age, and also the difficulties they may have in moving around it is difficult to say that doing this or that is what will help. As the son I would suggest that you schedule a time to get them to go for a walk with you! I say with you, because at least your mother will want to do what you ask, because children are the apple of their eye! My wife is disabled, and I can ask her to do something and she will say no, but have my son come in the room and ask the same thing, and she couldn't say yes fast enough!!! Also, like children have done to parents for ages, you can play one against the other! Not the best solution with that latter one, but you'd be surprised how effective it can be!

These are not sure fired ways, but in prayer, and with God's help you will surely succeed! Still, sometimes, folks do just get tired. Normally, trying to get them to do things is to seek peak hours of energy, which for most folks is the morning. Wait to the afternoon or evening, and more than likely you'll meet greater resistance to doing any exercises. Also, I guess you can make it fun. Make it like a game, oh, maybe even some old friends of theirs, even other family members or even neighbors that they get along with. Church involvement like getting the Pastor to visit, or if your church has a care ministry might also be able to help. Of course the church can send prayers Heavenward for them & you!!!

My heart goes out to you, and I'll pray for you all!

With the Love of Christ Jesus.
YBIC
Nick
\o/
<><

 

[GodB4Us]

Dear Brother,
Prayer of course is first and foremost. Asking for guidance, and that the Holy Spirit move upon their spirit with a desire to be accommodating to exercising.

I do not like that phrase when the Holy Spirit is in us. There is no moving of the Holy Spirit upon our spirits when He is with us always since salvation. Mayhap you meant to say something else, and not inferring a visitation of the Holy Spirit moving on my folks, but I am just letting you know that phrase to me has been used way too often for those apostasy that I speak against.

I know the Lord can direct our foot steps through the Holy Spirit in us and even give us the motivation to get out of bed. Jesus is certainly doing that for me.

I make certain that I credit the Son because everything the Holy Spirit does is to lead me to credit & glorify the Son as doing.

John 16:13 Howbeit when he, the Spirit of truth, is come, he will guide you into all truth: for he shall not speak of himself; but whatsoever he shall hear, that shall he speak: and he will shew you things to come.
14 He shall glorify me: for he shall receive of mine, and shall shew it unto you.
15 All things that the Father hath are mine: therefore said I, that he shall take of mine, and shall shew it unto you.

I know you meant well, but I do hope you rephrase your words that better reflect our faith in Jesus Christ so as to stand apart from how those in apostasy uses that phrase to mean as if a visitation from the Holy Spirit moving on believers.

Not knowing their age, and also the difficulties they may have in moving around it is difficult to say that doing this or that is what will help. As the son I would suggest that you schedule a time to get them to go for a walk with you! I say with you, because at least your mother will want to do what you ask, because children are the apple of their eye! My wife is disabled, and I can ask her to do something and she will say no, but have my son come in the room and ask the same thing, and she couldn't say yes fast enough!!! Also, like children have done to parents for ages, you can play one against the other! Not the best solution with that latter one, but you'd be surprised how effective it can be!

These are not sure fired ways, but in prayer, and with God's help you will surely succeed! Still, sometimes, folks do just get tired. Normally, trying to get them to do things is to seek peak hours of energy, which for most folks is the morning. Wait to the afternoon or evening, and more than likely you'll meet greater resistance to doing any exercises. Also, I guess you can make it fun. Make it like a game, oh, maybe even some old friends of theirs, even other family members or even neighbors that they get along with. Church involvement like getting the Pastor to visit, or if your church has a care ministry might also be able to help. Of course the church can send prayers Heavenward for them & you!!!

They are not honest with me regarding their health. I do not want to get into it, but there are indications that they are keeping something from me about both of them. I even found an after office visit regarding my Mother's health which had confirmed my suspicions and my dad just quit walking after that one doctor's office visit as if he got some bad news and he just isn't motivated any more. Anyway, Mom's in better health I guess since she moves about and goes out and even exercises, but not my Dad.

There was a time I had seen him walk around that route in the house recently but at most twice whereas before he was to do it 5 times before he stopped altogether for a while after that doctor's office visit. So I should thank the Lord for leading him to do that. I can pray that it is almost time for all of us to go and that He has us all ready & willing for when the Bridegroom comes.

My heart goes out to you, and I'll pray for you all!

With the Love of Christ Jesus.
YBIC
Nick
\o/
<><

I do thank you for your prayers.

There was a time when the Lord had to correct my speech to better reflect my faith in Jesus Christ, but I forgot what it was. He may remind me of it later on to share. As it is, He helps me to be a better witness of Him through the Holy Spirit in me. That is what I am counting on Jesus Christ for as my Good Shepherd & Friend in helping me to follow Him in thought, word, and deed each and every day as I know I can't do anything without Him.

May God bless you & keep you. May He shine His face upon you & give you His peace.

 

[Admon Mikha'el]

I honestly am not sure what to do to get your parents to excercise. I would try to convince them with the scriptures somehow to exercise. If that didn't work, then I guess it would be left up to prayer.

As for your own health I would be praying for the Lord to heal you. As for the voices, I don't know. I just read C.S. Lewis's book the Screwtape Letters. This was the first C.S. Lewis book I had read. I enjoyed it. It was about a demonic entity taking orders from its hierarchy to destroy a newly converted Christian from the faith by giving him invisible impulses. C.S. Lewis said it was stressful to put his mind into a state to write the book, and he didn't think his readers or him could have stood another volume.

As for your enemies coming into your house at night. Keep waking up, because you don't know at what hour the Lord is coming as a thief in the night. There are multiple verses of this throughout the New Testament. Some of which we discussed in the other thread.

Revelation 3:1-6

Mark 13:32-37
28 Now learn a parable of the fig tree; When her branch is yet tender, and putteth forth leaves, ye know that summer is near:

29 So ye in like manner, when ye shall see these things come to pass, know that it is nigh, even at the doors.

30 Verily I say unto you, that this generation shall not pass, till all these things be done.

31 Heaven and earth shall pass away: but my words shall not pass away.

32 But of that day and that hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels which are in heaven, neither the Son, but the Father.

33 Take ye heed, watch and pray: for ye know not when the time is.

34 For the Son of Man is as a man taking a far journey, who left his house, and gave authority to his servants, and to every man his work, and commanded the porter to watch.

35 Watch ye therefore: for ye know not when the master of the house cometh, at even, or at midnight, or at the cockcrowing, or in the morning:

36 Lest coming suddenly he find you sleeping.

37 And what I say unto you I say unto all, Watch

Some people should not give advice.