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How To Lose A Guy (Or Girl) In Ten Days

nockdan

Member
Joined
Nov 29, 2004
Messages
25
Dear Brethren, I came across this article on a website and found it nice to share with you. Just below * is the beginning of it.

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WARNING: These guidelines are in no particular order. By following any one or combination of these, you are practically guaranteed to lose your significant other in no time. * * *

Day 1: Only date a perfect-looking person.
This is really impossible, since no one looks hot all the time. (Not even Brad Pitt or Britney Spears.) So, why do we constantly prioritize and agonize over appearance? Instead, be realistic. Few people will ever look like Mr. Universe or Miss America; don't pass up knowing an amazing personality just because he or she won't grace a magazine cover. And be understanding. Don't dump your date just because you're embarrassed that she's suddenly sporting a huge zit. These things happen to everyone occasionally-if you have doubts, glance in the mirror yourself. In a world that over-emphasizes appearance, follow God's example and focus on what's really important-the heart. (1 Samuel 16:7)

Day 2: Tick off Mom and Dad.
It's hard to get along with your own mom and dad, much less please someone else's. But if you want parents to trust you and encourage your relationship, then be on your best behavior and stay on their good sides. Be respectful and courteous, and you will gain respect and courtesy in return. And if you ever consider doing something that mom or dad definitely wouldn't like, remember, it's no coincidence that God promises a long life to those who honor their parents! (Exodus 20:12)

Day 3: Practice gross habits.
Gross habits include foul smells, looks, sounds, and words. So, first, eliminate these by maintaining good personal hygiene. You know that thing called soap? Use it. Daily. Also, stick with exercise and a healthy diet; PS2 and Twinkies don't count. Next, clean up your language. Four-letter words don't belong in any vocabulary-no matter what the dialect. If you need help with this, open a Thesaurus or break out the soap again. Finally, remember the good 'ol, southern motto: "Don't smoke, drink, or chew, or go with those who do." People who reek of smoke and beer don't attract the nicest smelling individuals themselves-shocker, isn't it? So, it pays to pass up nasty habits. You'll look more responsible to adults and improve your relationship prospects.

Day 4: Hold a juvenile record.
And this isn't referring to the 50-yard dash. Actually, the rebel image is out; after all, in-school suspension and the local police department are not the best places to develop a relationship. No one wants to visit her "honey" behind bars. Besides, there's a lot to be said for making good choices. As Proverbs 21:21 reveals, "He who pursues righteousness and love finds life, prosperity, and honor." A clean record will help your future, and people will more likely trust, admire, and introduce you to friends and family.

Day 5: Be someone you're not.
"To be me, or not to be me? That is the question." Hamlet didn't phrase it quite like that, but you get the point. Should you be yourself around others, or someone you're not? If you're an identical twin or involved in drama, then you know the fun of acting like someone else and messing with people's minds. You also know that it's hard work to maintain a false identity, and no one can do it forever. By trying to keep up a different persona, you'll never give people the opportunity to know and like the real you. Also, if the charade continues long enough, you'll start messing with your own mind. So, despite the crowd you're in, be yourself. You'll find out who your true friends are, and you'll avoid paying high psychiatrist fees later.

Day 6: Get physical. You knew it was coming. And you've probably heard it before: relationships built on sex never last. Why? Because without a serious marital commitment to each another, you're just satisfying a short-term desire and are therefore easily replaceable. A fulfilling and lasting relationship must be founded on the principles of God's Word, not physical pleasure. "But we're not having sex," you might argue. Good, but are you headed there? Do you think you're safe by simply determining "how far is too far?" If that's your game plan, think again. Consider God's command to flee sexual immorality and respect the temple of the Holy Spirit-your body. (1 Corinthians 6:18-20) Then, determine the real issue: are you honoring God in everything you do?

Day 7: Become a stalker.
Answer the following questions and honestly evaluate your potential as a stalker: * Do I call, email, IM, text message, page, and/or talk with him more than 50 times a day? * Do I ditch my friends to hang out with him? * Do I have his full name, address, telephone numbers, email addresses, screen names, student ID, GPA, birth date, car tag, class and work schedules completely memorized? * Am I jealous of the time he spends apart from me? * Do I turn green, go cross-eyed, and breathe fire whenever he speaks to another girl? If you answered "yes" to any question, you'll probably have his home under surveillance before long. Advice: back off. Life is too short to be consumed with anybody, and you're probably smothering the poor guy. Reevaluate your actions and seriously ask yourself if you are violating the first commandment: "You should have no other gods before me, says the Lord" (Exodus 20:11). Make sure that God, not your significant other, is first in your life.

Day 8: Act like a jerk.
This seems obvious, yet there are many jerks pursuing relationships. Jerks don't express love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, or self-control-the fruit of the Spirit. (Galatians 5:22-23) If you're a jerk, you probably noticed that these characteristics are missing from your character. As Christians, the Holy Spirit lives within us. As we grow closer to God and stay in tune to Him, He works to develop these qualities in our lives-qualities that honor God and make us more likeable people. Change your character, change your life.

Day 9: Imitate your little brother or sister.
You know how preschoolers act-though cute, they're also mischievous and even irritating sometimes. But, at four years old, they can get away with behavior like that. You, however, will have a hard time socializing with the opposite sex if you approach them with the same maturity level as your little brother. This applies to your spiritual life, too. A strong Christian is going to notice someone who is also serious about growing in the faith, studying God's Word, and developing a prayer life. So, if your idea of a quiet time with God is watching VeggieTales' videos, leave those with your younger brother or sister and strive to be a little older, a little wiser, and a lot closer to God.

Day 10: Date an alien.
No, not an extraterrestrial, although dating one of those is probably not a good idea either. In this case, an alien is a stranger to the Christian faith; in other words, an unbeliever. Sure, it's okay to be friends with a non-Christian, but it's best not to develop a dating relationship with him or her. It doesn't matter if he's really nice and goes to church, or if she's really moral and really, really hot. Why not? To summarize 2 Corinthians 6:14-15: light is to darkness as believer is to unbeliever. They are complete opposites. And while opposites might attract sometimes, they won't last if they have different values and are headed in different directions. If you want someone to fully understand and support your faith in Christ, embrace a person who shares your commitment to God, and steer clear of all aliens-green or otherwise.

* * * And you didn't think God had anything relevant to say about your relationships! So, will you heed the warning or lose your love?
 
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