I feel scared and sad and hopeless

[Caitlin]

Hi,



I feel sad and hopeless. I saw the gospel message like last may and believed it and repented but then I ended up having a thoughts problem after fear of the unpardonable sin and attacked with unwanted blasphemous thoughts made my head obsessive and I have a fear of thinking sinful thoughts. I’m 17.



My relationship with God isn’t good and I’m struggling to follow Jesus.



My head has a thought problem for like 5 months I think where I get tempted to think thoughts about people out of obsession and fear of breaking the commands.



I read cursing verses in the Bible and then my head obsessed over them and get tempted to think the word curse all the time and about others and other bad thoughts and I don’t mean them.



I find it hard to be around people now. I ‘complained’ in my head a lot about how sad I am and how I feel and stuff.



I’m scared because I think my heart maybe got filled with other things like worldly things maybe and my love for God.



I’m scared incase what if I don’t love Jesus or enough. I try to keep the commands but my head gets tempted to think thoughts about people — my head was never like this before until my head started obsessing over sinful thoghts. And He said to keep the commands. And I think to myself a lot.



I’m scared because of my heart state: i think sinful thoughts made it less pure, soft, humble, loving etc..

And I’m scared about my heart state towards God and Jesus.



My head has bad thoughts a lot



I’m scared of hell and the end times and my family need saved.



I think the fear of death has caused me to love myself more and my life and everything like the flowers and colours and being able to walk etc... and I think it caused pride



I don’t think I’m on the narrow way and I struggle with thoughts everyday and don’t feel desire for Jesus and like affection for Him. I don’t feel connection with Him and struggle to follow Him and have my heart set on Him. Idk how to change it.

I’m scared because of the depart from me verse and the bad fruit broken branch verse and I’m scared of God leaving

I’m scared because of time and I feel far from God and I want to love Jesus and God more than myself and life.

thanks for reading

 

[BunnyOnion]

Thanks for writing.
I know what you mean.

I'm saved, I had a relationship with God for a long time. It was real too.
That internal guiding holy spirit would lead me and I'd follow and it would turn out OK every time.

I'd have dreams and days later they'd happen in waking life. I got so I could see the dream happening in waking life almost immediately.
I'd say, "Deja Vu!", sometimes out loud.

Years ago I started to notice dimes would appear at home, in my work vehicle, and sometimes when in public, like in the parking lot of a store.

After awhile I started to think they were sent by my passed on mom or dad, letting me know they were watching over me.

A few weeks ago while at work I had this thought pop into my head. Holy spirit?
I don't know but I was led to seek what the number 10 (dime value) meant according to ancient Hebrew numerology.

It was comforting to know maybe it was God giving me comfort and assurance when I'd see those dimes when times were rough.

Now, its all stopped except for the deja Vu dreams now and then.

And it all stopped when I started to wonder about the history of my faith and the seeming synchronous history between certain parts of the scripture and ancient Sumerian mythos.

I asked this in my Introduction thread.
Why do we need believe in the only Omniscient Omnipotent creator? Why does he need to be worshipped by us? Lesser beings, living fallen according to his will and predestined planning. Why doesn't he have to believe in us?

Who knows?
When the Bible says everything that exists is both of and from God, maybe the answer is it's all God playing with himself, his own games,while looking in the mirror.

We live it. Think we make our own free will choices in the midst of sovereign God who sets our steps. But really the Bible tells us it's all God's doing.

Even the lousy parts.
Kind of depressing for me at this point.
Maybe that's why God stopped sending those signs and his holy spirit has gone quiet? Because I'm on to something?


I can't really give you advice myself.
I dunno but at this moment life sucks.

 

[JerryfromMass]

Hi,



I feel sad and hopeless. I saw the gospel message like last may and believed it and repented but then I ended up having a thoughts problem after fear of the unpardonable sin and attacked with unwanted blasphemous thoughts made my head obsessive and I have a fear of thinking sinful thoughts. I’m 17.



My relationship with God isn’t good and I’m struggling to follow Jesus.



My head has a thought problem for like 5 months I think where I get tempted to think thoughts about people out of obsession and fear of breaking the commands.



I read cursing verses in the Bible and then my head obsessed over them and get tempted to think the word curse all the time and about others and other bad thoughts and I don’t mean them.



I find it hard to be around people now. I ‘complained’ in my head a lot about how sad I am and how I feel and stuff.



I’m scared because I think my heart maybe got filled with other things like worldly things maybe and my love for God.



I’m scared incase what if I don’t love Jesus or enough. I try to keep the commands but my head gets tempted to think thoughts about people — my head was never like this before until my head started obsessing over sinful thoghts. And He said to keep the commands. And I think to myself a lot.



I’m scared because of my heart state: i think sinful thoughts made it less pure, soft, humble, loving etc..

And I’m scared about my heart state towards God and Jesus.



My head has bad thoughts a lot



I’m scared of hell and the end times and my family need saved.



I think the fear of death has caused me to love myself more and my life and everything like the flowers and colours and being able to walk etc... and I think it caused pride



I don’t think I’m on the narrow way and I struggle with thoughts everyday and don’t feel desire for Jesus and like affection for Him. I don’t feel connection with Him and struggle to follow Him and have my heart set on Him. Idk how to change it.

I’m scared because of the depart from me verse and the bad fruit broken branch verse and I’m scared of God leaving

I’m scared because of time and I feel far from God and I want to love Jesus and God more than myself and life.

thanks for reading

Find a BIBLE believing church and pastor who is willing to disciple you. The right discipleship might be all you need right now. Blessings.

 

[timf]

You may wish to consider that intrusive or obsessive thoughts may also have a physiological source and could be controlled or reduced with medication or even nutritional supplements such as GABA.

 

[Sue D.]

And I would suggest reading in the Psalms. 37: 3, 4, 5, 7 = Trust in the Lord // Delight yourself also in the Lord // Commit your way to the Lord // Rest in the Lord.

And, yes, Do find a Bible-teaching church -- pastor / wife.

 

[Waggles]

My relationship with God isn’t good and I’m struggling to follow Jesus.

I believe we have been here before with these threads of woe from you
have you pursued any of the Godly advice that others have shared with you?

You need to empower yourself and walk in the power of the Holy Spirit
there are real Pentecostal churches in the U.K. where people have wonderful testimonies to transformed lives and faith through the baptism of the Holy Spirit
search for yourself and pray to Jesus to guide you to the truth of the gospel

The Revival Fellowship | There's a place in God's Kingdom for you.

 

[backNforth]

Good advice from Sue D.