I heard him

[Paid4]

I hope I am posting this in the right place.
I would like any adviceor opinions on something that has troubled me for a long time.

I would like to give you some background first.

I was saved when I was around 13 yrs. It was very sweet and powerful and I sobbed heavily. I was alone in my room at night when it happened. I was riding high for a while but with limited biblical knowledge I eventually lost my fire. I lived my life waiting for God to tell me my puprpose without really seeking him.

A few years later I was a typical 15 year old and I was a fan of wrestling. I started working out and I was a big fan of the Ultimate Warrior. I had his poster in my room and I was doing curls and looking at the poster thinking to myself " I want to be like him". It was then that I heard a voice say "when will you serve me?" I paused and put the weights down and said soon Lord, soon. I believed that I would eventually do something for God but I had no idea what. I look back and wonder why I wasn't more shocked that I heard a voice.

It was at this point in my life that I had my first real girlfriend and I became wrapped up in that. I was with her for 3 years and cared deeply for her. She dumped me our senior year and I was very down about it. I started hang out with a new crowd and got involved with some drug abuse for a few months. I was not happy with my life and I got down on my knees one night and prayed to God and I just told him I can't go on without his help and that I knew he loved me enough to step in and help. I cried my eyes out and I suddenly knew I was in the presence of our Lord. I did not see him.

The next day and the days going forward I began to feel a pull to clean myself up and live in a way pleasing to God. I suddenly had the strength to resist sin and I could feel that I was pleasing God. I was broken in spirit at this time and I was felt very humble and I began to feel overwhelming love for everyone I came in contact with.

I can remember being insulted by a coworker who was just being rude and he was trying his hardest to get a rise out of me but I felt no anger at all.

This is where it gets good. I began to feel God's presence more and more each day.It got to the point where I just said to him. "I know your here." Then I asked him "where are you?"(and I was literally looking around). Then I clearly and lovingly heard him say "I am inside of you". I was instantly filled with joy. I was walking on air and feeling electrified. (Mind you I had never heard of anyone speaking to God before like I hear it preached now). It was great for awhile but I still had no biblical knowledge and I eventually began to sin and buckle under the pressure of living a life that was pleasing to God. I did not want to hurt him but I was struggling with being different then regular 18 year old kids that I knew.

I told him that I'm not ready to live like this all the time that I just want to be a normal kid and live life and have fun.
In hindsight I could not be more ashamed of myself for saying this to God after such a powerful revelation from him.

Now here is my problem. I am now 31 years old and I have not heard from him since then. I have not lost my faith at all and I still love the Lord. Another thing that bothers me is that he said more to me than what I can remember. How do you forget what God says to you? It is very disturbing and has troubled me for years. I have had many questions and thoughts about this. Did I offend him? Am I being tested? Have I heard from him for the last time. Have I changed that much that I can not be the kind of person that can hear from him? I apologize for how long this was but I really want to give you a good idea about what has taken place. Please give me any advice you can!

 

[ladylovesJesus]

The one question that comes to mind here is have you truly repented of all your sins? When we confess our sins He will forgive us as 1 John 1.9 says. Repentance to turn around and not to go on sinning the same way.

Maybe you should pray the prayer of salvation. Many people commit their life to Jesus with the prayer and also pray it again when they recommit their life back to Him again. You went away from God and He never lets go of us.

God is seeking true worshippers who will worship Him in spirit and in truth.

Seek Him first each day. Matt 6.33.

God bless

LLJ :rainbow: :rose:

 

[abigya]

I hope I am posting this in the right place.
I would like any adviceor opinions on something that has troubled me for a long time.

I would like to give you some background first.

I was saved when I was around 13 yrs. It was very sweet and powerful and I sobbed heavily. I was alone in my room at night when it happened. I was riding high for a while but with limited biblical knowledge I eventually lost my fire. I lived my life waiting for God to tell me my puprpose without really seeking him.

A few years later I was a typical 15 year old and I was a fan of wrestling. I started working out and I was a big fan of the Ultimate Warrior. I had his poster in my room and I was doing curls and looking at the poster thinking to myself " I want to be like him". It was then that I heard a voice say "when will you serve me?" I paused and put the weights down and said soon Lord, soon. I believed that I would eventually do something for God but I had no idea what. I look back and wonder why I wasn't more shocked that I heard a voice.

It was at this point in my life that I had my first real girlfriend and I became wrapped up in that. I was with her for 3 years and cared deeply for her. She dumped me our senior year and I was very down about it. I started hang out with a new crowd and got involved with some drug abuse for a few months. I was not happy with my life and I got down on my knees one night and prayed to God and I just told him I can't go on without his help and that I knew he loved me enough to step in and help. I cried my eyes out and I suddenly knew I was in the presence of our Lord. I did not see him.

The next day and the days going forward I began to feel a pull to clean myself up and live in a way pleasing to God. I suddenly had the strength to resist sin and I could feel that I was pleasing God. I was broken in spirit at this time and I was felt very humble and I began to feel overwhelming love for everyone I came in contact with.

I can remember being insulted by a coworker who was just being rude and he was trying his hardest to get a rise out of me but I felt no anger at all.

This is where it gets good. I began to feel God's presence more and more each day.It got to the point where I just said to him. "I know your here." Then I asked him "where are you?"(and I was literally looking around). Then I clearly and lovingly heard him say "I am inside of you". I was instantly filled with joy. I was walking on air and feeling electrified. (Mind you I had never heard of anyone speaking to God before like I hear it preached now). It was great for awhile but I still had no biblical knowledge and I eventually began to sin and buckle under the pressure of living a life that was pleasing to God. I did not want to hurt him but I was struggling with being different then regular 18 year old kids that I knew.

I told him that I'm not ready to live like this all the time that I just want to be a normal kid and live life and have fun.
In hindsight I could not be more ashamed of myself for saying this to God after such a powerful revelation from him.

Now here is my problem. I am now 31 years old and I have not heard from him since then. I have not lost my faith at all and I still love the Lord. Another thing that bothers me is that he said more to me than what I can remember. How do you forget what God says to you? It is very disturbing and has troubled me for years. I have had many questions and thoughts about this. Did I offend him? Am I being tested? Have I heard from him for the last time. Have I changed that much that I can not be the kind of person that can hear from him? I apologize for how long this was but I really want to give you a good idea about what has taken place. Please give me any advice you can!

Dear Paid4 your story really touched me

There is some thing you mentioned more than once in between your story, you had the love and presence of God in your heart but with very little biblical knowledge.

I think here is where the problem comes, which ever part of your life lacking the word of God (knowledge) you are likely to be easily tempted to fall in to sin or is vulnerable to be attacked by the enemy.

You need to feed your soul with the word of God (knowledge) as you do your physical body every day (break fast, lunch and diner). As the bible says my people perish because they lack knowledge. biblical knowlege is power .


The word of God is Powerfull (Heb. 4:12)
12 For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two–edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.

Blessings
abigya

 

[Faithful Son]

Hebrews 13:5
5 Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For He Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”

John 10:27-30
27 My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me. 28 And I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; neither shall anyone snatch them out of My hand. 29 My Father, who has given them to Me, is greater than all; and no one is able to snatch them out of My Father’s hand. 30 I and My Father are one.”

 

[jiggyfly]

Revelation 2:4&5
4 But I have this complaint against you. You don’t love me or each other as you did at first! 5 Look how far you have fallen from your first love! Turn back to me again and work as you did at first.

Paid4, I appreciate your sincerity and honesty concerning your relationship with Christ. There is a principle which operates within the kingdom of God, it is "seek and you will find". So if you seek to hear from God, He will speak to you but it may be in a different way, a softer voice from within. In most cases when it seems we can not hear God speaking, it is not that Father has shut His mouth but rather our ears are stopped up.

Here is an old article I did some years back, maybe it will help you.

Increasing your appetite for Jesus

Do you feel close to Jesus? Are you where God wants you in relationship with His Son? Has your passion dwindled and your love for our Lord faded? If we are honest with ourselves, we would all conclude we need improvement in this area.

Many times, I have heard people seeking counsel ask how to regain the passion and hunger that they once had toward Jesus. I have answered each one the same way, with these questions. What causes our appetite to grow or increase? Is it lack or abundance? Almost always, they answer “lack”. But the true answer is “abundance”. Let’s compare our natural appetite to our spiritual appetite.

First of all, how can you crave something you have never tasted or experienced? Secondly, once you taste or experience something, you must feed that craving in order for it to grow. If you lose your appetite for something, how can you go about regaining it? All will agree that starvation is not the answer. So what is? Well, in Revelation 2:4&5, Jesus said “ Go and do your first works over “ In other words, do the same things that you did in the beginning.

Now you see where this is going. So let me ask you this. When you first experienced Jesus, how did you grow closer to Him? How did you feed your appetite for Christ? Before you answer, let me remind you we are not talking about the things of God, but God Himself. To put it another way, this is not about our relationship with the Church, our brothers and sisters or even ministry, but simply our relationship with the Godhead, Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Reflecting back to my first encounter or experience with Christ, growth was stimulated by reading and studying God’s Word, communing with His Spirit, and spending time in prayer.

So we can determine that an appetite or passion for Christ can grow only when fed with Christ. When we try to satisfy our craving for Jesus with ministry, fellowship, church services and religious ceremony it will cause our appetite for Jesus to wane and increase our appetite for these things. Before we continue, I want to clarify that our obedience to the Word should be a result of our passion or love for Christ and never be allowed to take the place of Christ.

“Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me , and I in him. Just as the living Father sent me and I live because of the Father, so the one who feeds on me will live because of me.”

John 6:56&57 NIV

Jesus makes it very clear, we must feed on Him to remain in Him. It seems simple enough. The Israelites grew tired of the manna and complained. Is that our problem too? Are we attempting to broaden our pallet? Are we bored with Christ? How could this be? Maybe we have not tasted all that Christ is. Maybe we have mistaken religion for Christ. David said in Psalm 34:8 “Taste and see that the Lord is good.” I think enough has been covered to challenge us.

Now here is a practical way you can respond to the challenge. Give Jesus 30 minutes as follows;

10 minutes of praise

10 minutes of reading / studying the word

10 minutes of prayer

Each day for one week. Evaluate your hunger for Christ at the end of one week and see if it has increased. If it has not , maybe something is in the way of you growing in your relationship with Christ. Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to you any dis-obedience, Then repent and ask our Father to forgive you and then repeat the procedure mentioned above. As your passion grows,increase the time you spend in each area each day. You will be amazed, as well as all those around you at the change in your passion and love for our Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ.

 

[Paid4]

Thank you for all of your help. I will put the advice given to me to good use.

 

[Faithful Son]

Brother Paid4, I don't talk about this much, actually I never talk about it.

If you'd like, send me a private message and we can discuss some things. I hear God too, I hear Him like you did once.

I'm only 23 years old, so I don't have all the knowledge, but I hope we can discuss some things.

God bless

 

[trulyblezzed]

Paid 4, I don't know what your relationship with God is like now, but if it's GOOD and I mean GOOD in all areas, it's just a matter of time before you hear His voice again.

God can speak to us in our ear like a regular person or through our heart. However, no matter how He speaks to us, we cannot hear Him if we aren't listening.

Have faith in His voice and continue on. Continue to have faith that you will once hear Him again and don't let fear an uncertainty rule your decisions.

We will keep you in our prayers. :butterfly

 

[Paid4]

Thanks again everyone. I would like to mention that I know God has not turned his back on me. God is holy, just, loving and merciful and I can still see him working in my life. I am causing the problem in one or more ways. Thanks for your help.

 

[abigya]

Thanks again everyone. I would like to mention that I know God has not turned his back on me. God is holy, just, loving and merciful and I can still see him working in my life. I am causing the problem in one or more ways. Thanks for your help.

You are most welcome paid4, and it is good to see that you have not forgotten God loves you with his ever lasting and unconditional love.

I will pray for you that you will be able to know God more through his word and discover his will in your life.

Many blessings
abigya

 

[WingedGrace]

Hey there Paid, thank you for sharing your story. It's very powerful. I'm happy to see that you are still loving and seeking Him now that you are older. I know what you're saying when you asked about hearing His voice again...once you hear it, you want more. But just like the other posters said, we need to be content with what we have of God, because even though we may not hear Him, He is always with us. I've been feeling like you lately, but we need to seek Him and open our eyes to the other ways He speaks to us...through other believers, Scripture, songs, etc...
I would love to talk with you about your life now. Please pm me, if you wish!

 

[Paid4]

Thanks again everyone.