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I need some advise and support

Joined
Mar 7, 2005
Messages
90
Heres the story, I kinda ran away 5 days ago(but i have permission from my mom to do so)
i've been living with my dad for two and a half years now and for aboit that whole time ive been struggling with not calling my mom and asking to live with her. My dad loves me and i love him but hes too domineering, if i have a diffrent opinion than him im wrong, i cant have a conversation with him about anything without being told om wrong or being told I...DONT HAVE TO TEACH HIM HE KNOWS!!! I'm sick of being yeleld at for dumb reasons like sunday when i was changing out of my church close he walked in and turned aroundt oleave i said thank you. He spazed and yelled at me and told me he wasnt going to put up with my teenage attutude and that i was not allowed to go to church that night with my friend. the list goes on but im tored of cryin and calling my best freind hysterical because i got hollared at for something dumb again. I dont want to go home anymore because i know he will be there. Its to the point that its making me sick, i dont want to eat if i do i feel like im going to throw up, when he yells at me i want to throw up and i have migranes all the time. After about two years ive given up and sunday afternoon i called my mom (lives in north carolina) who called her cousin who lives here im my town and now im staying with her. I'm going to be going up to live with my mom maybe my the end of next week, but im going ot miss my church and my friends in the youth group their likemy faimily.
I cant help but feel like im leaving somewhere that Gdo has called me but i cant live with my Dad anylonger and i have no family here to take me. I wont go back and live there i wouldnt have called my mom if i wasnt fed up.
She and my cousin(my moms cousin) have both talked to my dad and he told them both the same thing.
Whens she coming to get her stuff, because if she comes back nothing will change and the rules will be the same.
I iknow my father and he will not change and im not coming back.
My main delemma is leaving my family at church.
I want to cry thinking about it but im sick of crying.
My mom doesnt have a great relationship with the lord and shes filing for disability cuz she has problems from having six kids so close together(they dont all libve with her jsut a 5 year old a 7 year old and an eleven year old).
I would be working part time after school to help out with taking me on, which i dont mingd but she lives in the middle of nowherein northcarolina on a mountain and i dont know what opurtunityies ai'll have there and i have to find another church.
I need some support.
-- Andrea
 
an update, my dad came over to talk and talked to me for like a minute and a half and then went off on me and left. The next morning my mom told me that she wouldnt let me come if i didnt resolve things with my dad so i leave on good terms. we again didnt talk but he told me he would be over here at 3:30 to pick me up to take me to the doctor cuz i had been having headaches and i didnt want to go with him because i didnt watn to get in the car and him try to take me home. When he got here i told him i havent been having headaches for a while and that i wanted to know if he just wanted to stay here and talk. He went nuts and jumped out of the car and started yelling at me and came into the house called my mom blah blah blah. He said that if i didnt get into the car and leave with him he would call the cops and have me arrested(which i knew he couldnt do cuz my mom has full custody of me anyway) I told him that i wasnt leaving with him. He yelled some more about me thinking im grown or something. Then he left. about two hours later he pulls into the driveway with the cops. More yelling at me and then my cosin when she got home from work. I got out of the car because i thought i had just as much right to talk to the cop as him and so i did he yelled at me to get into the car but i wouldnt.
He started yelling at me and funny thing is he still thinks this is about me not getting to go somewhere with a friend.
I finally stood up to him and told him some of why he was leaving and stuff.
When the cop saw how my dad was acting he got out of the car and my cousin informed him that she was family and that legally my mom had coustody of me and was coming in a couple days to get me.
So my dad left and i was left crying and trembling. The last time i stood up to my dad for something dumb he was doing he called me a "female dog".
Now im just trusting in god to work things out and im clinging to the promise that hes going to take care of me and provide for me where ever i go.
-Andrea
 
That is a tough situation you are in. I really don't have any answers for you. I would suggest you continue pray to Jesus asking Him for a way out (I Corinthians 10:13). You have to trust Him for your needs. He is always beside us not matter what, you are not alone though you may feel alone. Our relationship with Him is not based on feelings, He is beside you.
I personally do not like yelling, it goes against everything that is inside me. May you be open to hear what He has to say to you.
 
Createdtoworship, my heart goes out to you. How old are you? I question why you are living with your father when your mother has full custody of you. I know that bouncing back & forth cannot be good...everyone needs a place to call home.

Answers won't come easy here, but please know that we are praying for you & also know that God can take the worst of situations & shine light into them & they can be as you never imagined. Things around you may be in turmoil, but God can provide a peace beyond understanding that will get you thru these times. It sounds as if the enemy has unleashed upon your family...take what he means for evil & turn it around (with God's help) to good. Read your Bible more, be in prayer more - & be sure to include praying for your dad - for him to have a good, fatherly love placed in his heart for you. I'm not saying he doesn't love you...he seems to be misguided in his parenting approach.

This time can serve to bring you down or make you stronger. I feel that you want it to make you stronger since you are reaching out to fellow believers. We will lift you up in prayer - please keep us posted.
 
moving out

dear createdtoworship, please go talk to your pastor or other elder in your church. there is proably much more to your family problems. adivce from a godly adult that knows you and the sitution better might be good. your pastor or youth leader might even be able to talk with you and your dad. I pray that God gives you peace in your decision and opens the right doors of where you are to be. It also sounds like both your parents need prayer, and a better relationship with the Lord, If they get closer to the Lord and follow Him they both will know where you are to be,and how to treat you.

Your Sister in Christ,
AlabasterBox :girl:
 
Hi created, we talked on Friday I believe in the Live Chat, you told me to check in here for your situation, well, I did.
I'm very sorry to hear, that your dad and you cannot get along with each other in these difficult teenie years, you are having anyway. . . A girl at this age needs not only understanding and helpful parents in this time, but an extra portion of love. . .
I wish I could be a part of your family at church to be able to help, hug and love you . . .but Im not, so I do want to bring our heavenly father and ask him to protect and love you in a very special way. . . to pour out his holy spirit new and guide you in all your upcoming steps. . . keep us updated, please. . love Dot (greetings from Germany. .. )
 
Hi Andrea, God bless you. You are in a position where only GOD will do the real deal major fixing but this is great. Let GOD do His miracles on your life - all you need to do is be and remain faithful to Him. Give it all to the Cross 100% and watch how GOD will make things right.

You will be overwhelmed with joy in the end.
 
Try to forgive your dad, its hard,but you might not be leaving your "calling", God may feel you've done your part there, and its time to spread his word somewhere else. for example, you said your mom wasnt too close to God, maybe your being sent there to help her become a better Christian, and others at your new church as well! So what im saying is dont lose hope and remember "After every storm there's a rainbow!!"

In Him ,
Emily

_________________________

When Things are looking down......
Look Up........^
 
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