Is Boxing ok?

[Eve]

My 14 year old daughter has asked to do boxing/kick boxing. Mainly to keep fit and for self defence. Although it is a mutually consentual sport I am concerned that this sport seems so violent and that she may hurt herself and secondly she may hurt someone else if she goes. I have asked her to consider doing something else as a hobby but she says she doesn't have any interest in anything else. She plays rugby and the season has finished, that is her only other interest.

I asked her about going back to doing swimming but she has no interest in that at the moment.

I am concerned that if I don't let her go to boxing practice, she will just be hanging around with bad company or have peer pressure on her to drink alcohol.

Should I allow her to go? I am sorry it may be a stupid question but I really don't know if Christians can be boxers?

Any view would be much appreciated.

God Bless

Eve

 

[stephen]

At 14 your daughter is so full of energy and life. That she is active in sport is great. Re boxing, I would not have a problem if a grand-daughter of mine were in to it. Your daughter has the self confidence to handle this and enjoy!

What I look out for and watch, are the fringe activities. And the folks that hang around and are not involved.

But I am sure you are aware of all these things.

God Bless

 

[Chad]

This is how I honestly view it:

- does it glorify GOD? No.
- is it healthy when your getting your face pounded? No.
- self defense? Call out to Jesus when you need protection

I would recommend kick boxing only if its the type that is aerobic/cardio workout. Not the karate style kick boxing.

She's only 14 too. That's very young to consider kick boxing. I could be wrong otherwise.

Ultimately, pray that the Holy Spirit guides you sister. GOD has the best answer. Would Jesus kick box if He was incarnate in today's time? I honestly cannot imagine so.

 

[ladylovesJesus]

I agree with Chad. When I first read this post, I thought this was a bad hobby to take up. It does nothing to glorify God and in my opinion is a dangerous thing to take up. I would not even let a young teenage boy take up this so called sport.

God bless

LLJ :rainbow: :rose:

 

[calluna]

Apart from what Chad said, I don't think boxing is a good idea for anybody, blows to the head repeatedly over time does cause problems within the brain. Loss of memory, weakened cognitive skills, poor speech etc..... I saw a program on it once a long time ago. It shows what happens to the brain each time the face/head is punched. The brain is surrounded in fluid to protect it. but when the head is jarred severely, the force of the blow causes the weight of the brain to slosh around and slightly disperses the protective fluid so it makes it thinner, so the brain hits the inside wall of the skull.

I would compare this to putting a raw egg in its shell inside a bowl of soft pudding and shaking it about a bit.

I would advise to do further research for yourself and then you will discover the damage that this sport can cause.

There also have been articles in the news just recently that boxing has become popular among teens in their homes and back yards, without any kind of supervision, there have been cases of injuries and students who were disoriented, with weakened cognitive skills.

To add, my son also asked me about boxing, I think he was trying to wind me up, but I still put him straight about putting that idea out of his head and I shared with him the practical dangers of it as in it making him brain damaged, also I asked him what is the purpose of bashing eachother in the head. He didn't have an answer and laughed and he hasn't mentioned it since.

:shade:Calluna

 

[Eve]

Thank you for your thoughts. I found out a girl my daughter looks up to goes kick boxing.

I am rather nieve about it, I do not know what the fringe activities are Steven but thank you for alerting me to this.

I too Chad, have had my reservations about this sport in general. When my daughter brought the subject up a picture came into my mind of the calm demeanor of Jesus. A thought also crossed my mind as to whether this brought glory to the Lord. I have to say I too could not see how it could. However, I then remembered having seen boxing on the T.V. a couple of times. I noticed that some boxers use the sign of the cross before starting a match. So I was a bit confused. as to whether a Christian could do this sport.

Thank you Calluna for graphically depicting raw egg for me, although I said at the time to my daughter I was worried that it might damage her brain, I am even more determined that she doesn't take part in any type of boxing that involves blows to the head. I am certainly not happy about the idea of my daughters brain being turned into jelly! I will investigate as to whether the kick-boxing is punch bag orientated, head orientated or person orientated! As this could influence my decision greatly.

I have also heard that many phycologists now believe that violent sports do not have a possitive effect on the mind as they once thought. It used to be believed that sparing etc... got the aggression out of a persons body. Apparently, it is now thought that it fosters aggression and the only benefit to having punch bags etc... is the physical release it offers by expelling stress, hormones etc... accumulated in the body, through the act of the aerobic workout. Hence why going for a walk calms you down I guess!

I will have to way up the negatives and possitives, based on further research into what type of boxing etc.. is in offered in our area. My daughter has certainly shown that she needs a physical activity to get rid of some of her pent up hormones, stress and to keep her body fit but unfortunately she is very picky on the activity, feeling embarassed for example about going running etc, in case she is seen by one of her class mates. Or going to the pool as she is now self conscious of her body due to the skinny role models in the media.

I hope the boxing request will just be a phase she is going through, last week she wanted her belly button pierced because her friends had it done! I think she has thankfully gone off the idea after I warned her of the complications etc. I agree with you on that LLJ, there are so many dangers out there in this modern world we live in!

God Bless

Eve

 

[Chad]

Sister, I just want to point out some things. First, I'm not a parent so I do not have kids, but I can still speak of what GOD has put on my heart to share with you.

Do not be afraid of being tough, out of love. Your a parent, your responsible for your young 14 year old daughter. Do not be afraid or even hurt that your child is not getting what she wants. That is tough love and tough discipline, especially in today's crazy world we live in. Its required and something lacking of parents nowadays. Be a tough godly woman and do what the Holy Spirit tells you to do.

You clearly seem more uncomfortable about this sport. This should hint you that it *might* be GOD warning you not to let her do this sport. I could be wrong, but alot of times these feelings are a simple sign for us. The Holy Spirit gives us such simple emotions as a warning.

Also, I would (if you haven't yet) talk to your daughter about good self esteem. Build her up with good self esteem. Let her know that what GOD thinks is ultimately important, not what her sinner classmates think of her. Tell her the devil is a liar and that *all negative feelings come from the devil*.

Hope this helps GOD bless you.

If she feels buitl up with better self esteem, perhaps she'll consider a safer sport in the long run.

 

[Eve]

Thank you Chad, my daughter sometimes does seem lost. She said to me that boxing would be better than her hanging around with friends in the street having nothing to do. She has a curfew, however, I worry about being too strict as I rebelled when I was younger against a strict upbringing. It seems so difficult to get the balance right.

I noticed her showing my 5 year old son the other day how to defend himself by her getting him to punch her hands with his fist. I said to her at the time although her motives were sincere I didn't think that was a good idea! I worry about the influences she is receiving but do not want for her to rebel like I did when I was young.

Her true personality is a placid one, that has fruits of the Holy Spirit. However, it seems she is in conflict fighting her true nature. She is copying her non Christian friends rather than copying the Lord and this concerns me. In the bible it says bad company corrupts and this is definately true in this case.

I know that she prays to the Lord privately in her bedroom and talks to a photo of her late Dad. I pray that she receives her own guidence from the Lord and I hope that I can also incourage her to make the right choices.

God Bless

Eve

 

[Chad]

Sister Eve,

About her private prayers (excellent, especially for a young 14 yr old)...the part you mentioned about talking to a photo of her late father. This is sad and clearly she is hurt, or at least misses her father, naturally anyway. I'm at a lost of words about this, but consider it a necessary warning to try to advise her that praying to the deceased is wrong and unscriptural. It can easily invite in demons who will try to appear as angels of light (2 Corinthians 11:14). This may be a tough discussion to have with her since she's young and obviously misses the father she loves. All I can say is pray for guidance. May GOD grant you both immense discernment and wisdom.

GOD bless you.

PS: definitely talk to her about imitating Jesus. Let her know that when any one needs to defense, all they need to do is call out to Jesus! He loves us, watches over us always and protects us always for those who believe in Him and call out to Him. Remind her of this simple thing...

"Would Jesus be in a boxing ring hitting others with His hands?"

 

[calluna]

Dear Eve, about the boxing question, if you are leaning towards a decision which one brings you peace in your heart and mind?
As for the boxers you see on tv doing the sign of the cross, it doesn't mean they are Christian and it doesn't mean anything to God.

It is understandable that your daughter misses her dad, has she ever received any grieving type of counselling? It is sad and I hope that your daughter continues to seek the Lord for guidance and comfort.

The teenage years are difficult, and I think just encouraging our children to discover their talents and gifts is important. I don't know if it's different with daughters, but with my son, it's like pulling teeth. However we can still try and if your daughter has an artistic or creative side to her, then maybe that could be an area to expand on, like buying canvas and art supplies, or has she ever tried photography? music...any interest there? Dance classes...could that be a possibility...it's not just ballet, there is contemporary, jazz, etc. A bit different from rugby I know, but it's ok to have contrasting interests.

If defending herself or building confidence is a core issue, what about self-defense classes the ones where they teach women how to defend off attackers, they learn skills that I would hope they would never have to use, but it brings a kind of confidence knowing they have those skills tucked away in the back of their mind. And of course what Chad says goes without saying really, we can call on the name of Jesus to help protect us.

Anyhow God bless you and your daughter

Calluna

 

[Eve]

I got the impression at the time that she was talking to her father's picture as though he was looking down from heven. I will however, make sure that she is not doing any praying to her father directly. Thank you for pointing to the appropriate scripture and consequences. At the time I only understood that Anglicans were not supposed to pray to the deceased and didn't understand exactly why. Now having this knowledge strengthens my wishes for her not to do it.

I asked her this morning before school "do you think boxing glorifies the Lord". She was drying her hair at the time with the hair dryer and she responded "Do you think that drying my hair with a hair dryer glorfies the Lord" I replied "No, not particularly". My teenager seems to have an answer to everything these days!

I have told her that I will not allow a sport that is violent however, I said "I am prepared to work with you and find a compromise that first and foremost the Lord will be ok with and secondly something that you will ok with". At that point she did seem open for me to come up with some alternative sport ideas! I couldn't think of anything at the time though!!!!

The councelling appointment has been made for Thursday, she gets to miss one of the lessons she hates at school to go to it so that has cheered her up. Also amazingly her best friend offered to go running with her. It was brilliant to see, they went out even though it was pouring with rain (they said it cooled them off when they ran) and had a great time. They ran 10 miles and both of them seemed full of the joys of spring when they got back! They have decided to make it a regular thing (but with teenagers who can say when they will get bored of it). The main thing is she seems so much happier when she got back!

God Bless

Eve

 

[Chad]

Regarding drying her hair, it sounds like she was being sarcastic but witty. Don't take it personal that I've said that sister, its just her age. At least she's smart at her age!

I would respond with something to the effect of "drying your hair is not an important issue at all, nor serious when it comes to making decisions about getting your head punched and pounded, hurting the temple of GOD, your body that He has given you".

 

[Janette]

Define "ok"

I would not allow my daughter to take up boxing of any sort.

I would refer her to any of a dozen websites about the injuries sustained in boxing.

I would make an appointment with a doctor to discuss the guaranteed affects of constant trauma to the brain (let alone the possible affects of an immediate severe injury).

I would look for interview materials on "career" boxers so my daughter could watch them degenerate mentally before her eyes the way we have over the years (if you watch the sports news).

---

If she feels she *must* get into something for the sake of self-defence, then let her take a *real* self-defense course where she'll spend a lot more time practicing moves than engaging in combat and where every last move will not be directed at her brain.

 

[Eve]

I completely agree Chad it was quite sarcastic. I will mention to her the body is the temple of the holy spirit, this flashed before my mind but I didn't put it into words at the time!

Last night it was sweet to see her and her friend in front of a keep fit video with baked bean tins as hand weights! I also caught my 5 year old son lifting my ball of wool up and down copying them!

My daughter mentioned boxing again resently and said another one of her friends wanted to take it up!

Janette, to be honest, I am not happy about boxing per se, however, my daughter was so enthusiastic about it I felt I owed it to her to investigate thoroughly and weigh up the pros and cons. After careful consideration I am prepared to entertain the possibility of her doing a punch bag, keep fit approach (1) the punch bag doesn't hit/kick back. 2) she wouldn't be hurting anyone else. (3) a fitness class of this type would I feel not likely be influenced by another religion. (Unfortunately, the kickboxing club classes in our local area seem more combat and Tae Kwon Do associated. I would really worry about her going into to anything like that as I think Tae Kwon Do is linked with budhism. I also would not feel comfortable allowing her to go to a dojo even if the class itself was punch bag/non religion orientated knowing that potentially the instructor maybe influenced by another religion and idols at that setting.)

I have yet to investigate the local leisure centres and will keep you all updated on what I find out.

God Bless and thanks for all your wise advice.

Eve

 

[Janette]

punchbag

I'd agree that the punchbag approach isn't likely to do her any harm. My only objection to combative boxing as a sport is that it demands the body endure so much repeated trauma.

I also don't want to be a stormcrow, but I can't help but think that in this day and age, if your daughter is suddenly concentrating on sports that are forms of self defense, that perhaps you should investigate a bit.

You don't box to get a pretty figure, so what's the motivation?

Was she threatened, was a friend harmed? There's often more to a sudden interest in a protective sport than "all my friends are doing it." Because you say she's always been very athletic, it may just be the newest athletic fad...but I know from experience that when some girls get gung ho about self-defense sports, there may be a reason beyond physical fitness.

 

[tomsk]

Why not take this situation as an opportunity to make a decision together. Would it be possible to do something like set a time to talk it through properly. Say in advance that you will let her make her own decision, but that you have some concerns about her safety and so on.

If you are clear that you have her best interests at heart, and that you will trust her to make the decision, she is likely to respond positively.

In short, if you treat her as a mature person capable of making wise decisions, you may get the best from her. Fourteen is not so very far away from adulthood, when she will be expected to make far bigger decisions on her own, so a bit of practice may be a good thing.

Just an idea. Of course you know your daughter and I don't...

 

[ushalk]

eve i think you are doing the right thing in encouraging your daughter to do something else. for boxed for years in my youth and it really did more damage than good. there is nothing in the sport that glorifies jesus in any way shape or form. not to mention the brain problems it can cause from being hit in the head all of the time. have you thought about ballet or gymnastics or even youth christian programs. maybe even dancing the lord loves for us to dance before his throne.