is my friend still a Christian? or has she fallen away?

[hopeinjesus]

hi, I am writing about a friend I have who has been a believer but with lots of ups and downs and depression. Lately she got very down for some time and she was thinking - or perhaps the enemy was suggesting - suicidal thoughts and stopping church. During this time she thought about going to hell. Since then, she has been wondering and worried that God has left her. She is barely praying now and just keeps wanting an answer to this question. She thinks that she has grieved God.

 

[azuredepths]

If your friend is a genuine born again believer, you don't have to worry about that much.
1 Peter 4:12-14
There is an old hymn saying "Some through the fire, some through the flood but all through the blood"
Often times God will put us through fiery trials to test our faith.
Charles Spurgeon writes:
"A faith that is never tried how can you depend upon it ? It is by faith that we are saved, justified and brought near to God and therefore is no marvel that it is attacked. By faith God is greatly glorified, and hence by faith Satan is greatly annoyed. He rages at faith because he sees therein his own defeat."
Sometimes God also withdraws His presence from us so that we may realise what we are in Him and what we are without Him. He will blow mighty winds upon us to remove all our strongholds, so we may learn total dependece on God.He will never forsake His children Romans 8:39 , Philippians 1:6 but He will chasten them, or He will prune them John 15:2.
Remember Peter, it was necessary for Peter to be sifted by Satan in order to become a useful tool to God. Luke 22:31-32

Maybe your friend has been disobedient or fallen into sin, just pray for her.

God Bless!

 

[Boanerges]

1Jn 3:20 For if our heart condemn us, God is greater than our heart, and knoweth all things.

Tell your freind to put her faith in the grace of God and not to dwell on random, negative thoughts or feelings.

Luk 12:32 Fear not, little flock; for it is your Father's good pleasure to give you the kingdom.

2Co 10:4 (For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds
2Co 10:5 Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;

 

[sunshineaaks]

hi, I am writing about a friend I have who has been a believer but with lots of ups and downs and depression. Lately she got very down for some time and she was thinking - or perhaps the enemy was suggesting - suicidal thoughts and stopping church. During this time she thought about going to hell. Since then, she has been wondering and worried that God has left her. She is barely praying now and just keeps wanting an answer to this question. She thinks that she has grieved God.

One thing I’ve found in my own life is that Satan will do all he can to keep a believer down and focused on things around them and self rather than on Christ. Many times depression is one of those things. I also, strongly believe that ‘depression’ has a lot to do with unforgiveness WHICH hampers our relationship with God. We refuse to forgive (disobedience to His word) some offence and though He has forgiven us the sins we bring to Him, He also leaves us to our tormentors (depression, bitterness, agony and aloneness) until we become obedient.

God never leaves us, He has promised this many times. He does, however, let us go our own way if we refuse obedience to Him, much like the unforgiving servant in Matthew 18.

Hebrews 13:1-5 gives a sampling of obedience to Him and in verse 6 knowing He will not leave or forsake us (vs5) we can boldly say “The Lord is my helper”. He is changeless, though we shake and sway often when He is not our focus.

A suggestion to you for your friend might be to ask her if there is something that she finds too hard to forgive. Something that someone has done to her or maybe even something that she finds hard to ‘forgive in herself’. The ‘hard to forgive myself’ happens to be another lie Satan uses to keep us down.

We go to God for forgiveness of a certain sin we have committed against Him, God forgives and THEN WE decide that WE can’t forgive it??? This places OUR forgiveness of ourself FAR above that of God’s….. another sin.

When Satan brings up over and over again ‘our sin’ that HAS been forgiven, all we really can do is PRAISE GOD for forgiving us of that sin!! With God’s forgiveness also comes turning from it (as most have done though often we feel bad we did it in the first place) He is constantly by our side to guide and lead away from sin. Satan, on the other hand, constantly reminds us of our sin. Praising God for forgiving us is like finger nails on a chalk board to Satan. Something he can’t stand and will leave for a while until he can find something else to make us stumble.

What church was she going to, if you don’t mind my asking? I am hoping it is not a church that states living a life for Christ is all sunny and bright, cause it is not. This and many other teachings stumble up a new believer or a believer who is struggling. ( 1 John 4:1; 2 Cor 11:13-14)

An easy life is not promised but rather there would be hardship along with the testing of our faith but our strength and victory is in Him (2 Cor. 2:9; 1Cor 13:5; Romans 8:26-39). James 1 speaks of testing our faith which we are to consider it all joy, knowing testing our faith produces endurance. (vs 2-3) Putting it all on Christ, however, makes it all bearable (Matthew 11:29-30)

 

[spirit1st]

Heb 13:5 Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.

satan is the great deceiver! he wants all mankind dead and in hell suffering!
God wants us blessed and full of joy!

It might be? He wants her following Him , instead of a church here?

We MUST follow Only HIM!
The forcus Must be On and for Him .He alone is worthy!
It Must always Be for HIS glory and Honor!

We NEVER get the glory!

Churches will fail us, He will Never fail us or leave us or forsake us!

 

[Hekuran]

Good advice above.

Remember that even Spurgeon - who is quoted so powerfully in this thread - suffered terrible crippling depression.

Stick by your friend. Even if she cannot face church services, she may welcome being supported in prayer in a more private setting.

If you are really committed to supporting her through her depression, it may be wise to get some support for yourself too as it can be very demanding on the soul and the emotions.

 

[Brighthouse]

Hi HopeinJesus! Boanerges gave a wonderful scripture!! 1 john 3:20!! excellent brother! I have found out how to stop the very highs and very lows we all have from time to time in our life,We MUST!! stay in the Word! And when doubt creeps in so bad, we cannot stand it! We speak the Word outloud as we read it!!( rom 10:17) This so helped me, when the devil is lieing so loud to our minds and hearts! ( hebrews 13:5-6) in the New and Deaut, 31:6 in the old. I have to remind myself daily,even as our body grows weak from not eating food,our Spirit man grows weak as well from not reading the Word,for this is food for us as well! Please tell her God has not forsaken her or left her,and also that God is not a feeling,as many times we make him,he is like you and me,a living Person,so treat him in such a maner as you would another person you care deeply for. Because he cannot be seen,does not mean he is not there,it just means we cannot see him at this time. When you praise him,and sing to him,he will jump from within you,and you will know,he has never left,we have is all.Blessing to you!

 

[The Robster]

Your friend needs to get exposed to the gospel of grace. Many churches are preaching law or a mixture of law and grace and its destroying believers. When someone doesn't know how to enforce Jesus' finished work in their lives, then they need to hear the gospel fo grace. And too many American churches are trailing in this regard. My advice to your freind OP, get her exposed to Pastor Joseph Prince and his resources. Now that's a brother that preaches grace, the unadulterated way Apostle Paul preached it. People don't just get down for no reason. They believe wrong things about God and every believer should be learning to walk under grace, otherwise you are just going to live a life of constant defeat. Jesus took away our depression at the Cross. And i can guarantee you that the root cause of your friend's problems are guilt and condemnation. And many believer's are suffering from this. Every sickness, every disease, every condition we suffer is an attack from the enemy.

 

[Romans 8.28]

Depressed and suicidal thoughts are not uncommon among Christians.

Job 3:3 Let the day perish wherein I was born, and the night in which it was said, There is a man child conceived.

Jeremiah 20:14 Cursed be the day wherein I was born: let not the day wherein my mother bare me be blessed.

1 Kings 19:10 And he (Elijah) said, I have been very jealous for the LORD God of hosts: for the children of Israel have forsaken thy covenant, thrown down thine altars, and slain thy prophets with the sword; and I, even I only, am left; and they seek my life, to take it away.

1 Samuel chapter 28. Saul is at war with the Philistines and God will not answer his prayer. He seeks a witch at En-dor in verse 7 & 11 to bring up the now deceased Samuel from the dead to answer his questions since God will not. In verse 19 Samuel tells Saul that tomorrow he and his sons will be with him. (In Abraham's bosom - the abode of the righteous dead before Christ died.)

Saul committed suicide.

 

[PrayerWarr1or]

The Storm through Binoculars

One thing to remember more than anything is how important your role is in her life right now. She is losing her way or has already lost it, the light you give her is probably going to be one of the main things keeping her going. Keep giving her the good news of Jesus, dont be afraid to keep trying to help her stand again, and most importantly pray to the Lord that she find her way back to Him.

John 15:13
Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.

That verse shows me how important friends are in our lives, such an important role fellowship is for any Christian for God does His work through us most often of times. Keep talking to your friend and praying for her, if she is true with God then its only a matter of time until she is in His light once more.

God bless
Casey Vermin

 

[sunshineaaks]

One thing to remember more than anything is how important your role is in her life right now. She is losing her way or has already lost it, the light you give her is probably going to be one of the main things keeping her going. Keep giving her the good news of Jesus, dont be afraid to keep trying to help her stand again, and most importantly pray to the Lord that she find her way back to Him.

John 15:13
Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.

That verse shows me how important friends are in our lives, such an important role fellowship is for any Christian for God does His work through us most often of times. Keep talking to your friend and praying for her, if she is true with God then its only a matter of time until she is in His light once more.

God bless
Casey Vermin

Excellent advice!

 

[sharen]

Christians do need each other. No matter how mature you get, christian fellowship is very important.

Sometimes we can take such a slamming in our walk that we need others to help us up. Just be there for her (and get others to pray if you can and it's appropriate.)

I'll add a prayer too.


PS. Be longsuffering. Sometimes a hard season can really drag on in a persons walk. Be patient. Love (true love) is patient and kind.

 

[PhoenixRising]

hi, I am writing about a friend I have who has been a believer but with lots of ups and downs and depression. Lately she got very down for some time and she was thinking - or perhaps the enemy was suggesting - suicidal thoughts and stopping church. During this time she thought about going to hell. Since then, she has been wondering and worried that God has left her. She is barely praying now and just keeps wanting an answer to this question. She thinks that she has grieved God.

We grieve God everyday we are alive on this earth BUT we serve an amazing God who is full of grace. The power and passion of His love covers our weakness in all its forms and His strength is shown mightily in our most desperate of cicumstances.

He forgives and forgives and forgives. God is a God of a thousand million chances and NEVER gives up on us even when we have seemingly given up on ourselves. He encourages and strenghtens and emboldens and loves and loves and loves. There is NOTHING like God's love and amazing grace.

Please remind yourself and your friend of God's love. Let her know that God sees her exactly where she is and is reaching out with open, loving arms to comfort her and let her know that all will be well if she will only trust and focus on Him. He knows what to do in her circumstance. Believe that.