junk.bunny
Member
- Joined
- Mar 13, 2008
- Messages
- 9
I'm sorry - I know I don't post here that often, but I need to discuss something with fellow Christians who will try to understand what I'm going through and offer suggestions and support.
This isn't a major problem in terms of the big scheme of things, but it does get to me and make me feel down.
I am 22 years old, and this year I have become good friends with a 25 year old woman in my church. She's really cool and I admire her a lot. We have a great friendship that I am very thankful for. She looks out for me and is supportive when I need it, and I try my hardest to do the same for her.
Anyway, I inevitably met her whole family. Her parents are very nice, and her mother has taken a special liking to me, even 'adopting' me as an additional daughter, as my whole family have now moved to another country and I'm the only one left here. All in all they're a great family with a lot of love to give, and I absolutely adore spending time with them.
But there is a problem that has developed, and I only just realised it recently - I have a crush on my friend's younger brother. The first thing that makes me feel bad about it is that he is her brother. I feel as though she would be angry at me for feeling that way about him (I don't know how true this is). The second problem - which I feel is worse than the first - is that he's only 18. I just turned 22. Even if he is turning 19 this year, that's still at least a 3 year gap between us. I feel really ashamed about it, but I love spending time with him - he's funny, has a good heart and really brightens up a room.
What do I do about this? I feel inclined to tell my friend how I feel about her brother - because I feel as though I'm keeping this dirty secret from her! And I don't want that - I want to be honest... except I'm really scared of what she's going to think of me, not only because he is her brother but because he's so much younger than me.
What makes the whole thing worse is that I get a feeling he may have an interest in me too - I catch him watching me a lot, and he'll do little things, like take note of something I've said and then bring it up later - but in saying that, it's possible he does it with everyone. And, since I have a crush on him, it is more than likely I am reading too deeply into these things and perceiving them in my favour.
What should I do? Do big age gaps really matter that much? Would God see this as inacceptable behaviour? And, should I confess it to my friend? I tell her and trust her with a lot of my problems, and I hate having to keep this from her. Or is it better for me to keep it to myself and deal with it myself?
Thank you for reading... I hope I don't seem petty. I know this is pretty trivial. I'm not trying to make it sound like my problem is big. Really, it is very small.
This isn't a major problem in terms of the big scheme of things, but it does get to me and make me feel down.
I am 22 years old, and this year I have become good friends with a 25 year old woman in my church. She's really cool and I admire her a lot. We have a great friendship that I am very thankful for. She looks out for me and is supportive when I need it, and I try my hardest to do the same for her.
Anyway, I inevitably met her whole family. Her parents are very nice, and her mother has taken a special liking to me, even 'adopting' me as an additional daughter, as my whole family have now moved to another country and I'm the only one left here. All in all they're a great family with a lot of love to give, and I absolutely adore spending time with them.
But there is a problem that has developed, and I only just realised it recently - I have a crush on my friend's younger brother. The first thing that makes me feel bad about it is that he is her brother. I feel as though she would be angry at me for feeling that way about him (I don't know how true this is). The second problem - which I feel is worse than the first - is that he's only 18. I just turned 22. Even if he is turning 19 this year, that's still at least a 3 year gap between us. I feel really ashamed about it, but I love spending time with him - he's funny, has a good heart and really brightens up a room.
What do I do about this? I feel inclined to tell my friend how I feel about her brother - because I feel as though I'm keeping this dirty secret from her! And I don't want that - I want to be honest... except I'm really scared of what she's going to think of me, not only because he is her brother but because he's so much younger than me.
What makes the whole thing worse is that I get a feeling he may have an interest in me too - I catch him watching me a lot, and he'll do little things, like take note of something I've said and then bring it up later - but in saying that, it's possible he does it with everyone. And, since I have a crush on him, it is more than likely I am reading too deeply into these things and perceiving them in my favour.
What should I do? Do big age gaps really matter that much? Would God see this as inacceptable behaviour? And, should I confess it to my friend? I tell her and trust her with a lot of my problems, and I hate having to keep this from her. Or is it better for me to keep it to myself and deal with it myself?
Thank you for reading... I hope I don't seem petty. I know this is pretty trivial. I'm not trying to make it sound like my problem is big. Really, it is very small.
