Problems with my mum

[angel rose]

Hi I'm a 16 year old girl. I find that I've been having this problem for ages and I can't bear it anymore. My mum seems to always put me down in front of others and laugh at things that are not my fault for having e.g my height ( I'm really short ). Every single time she does it I try to contain myself and I never insult her back again. Sometimes if I try to tell her that why she did was hurting, she'd either laugh more or tell me to brighten up and take it as a joke. Even though she's my mum and I love her so much, this problem has been hurting me badly for ages. I sat down and cried hard today because I couldn't bear it and had no one else to help me . I face this problem every day and I am a sensitive person in general. Please can someone help me ? What do I do when my mum insults me '?

 

[Brad Huber]

Tell her you love her despite how cruel her words can be toward you. And say it every time she does it to you, ESPECIALLY if around others.

 

[angel rose]

Tell her you love her despite how cruel her words can be toward you. And say it every time she does it to you, ESPECIALLY if around others.

Thank you so much for helping me , I'll try that out and hope for the best..

 

[Dreamer]

Angel Rose, I want to tell you that God loves you and you're precious. Yes, you forgive your mom each time. But I'm not really concerned with her here. I'm concerned about you, for you are a wonderful and special young lady who deserves love and acceptance from her parent. God, as your parent, accepts you in every way! You're beautiful! You smile and laugh are one of a kind, your shortness is cute, or He wouldn't have made you that way! Your mom has some deep insecurities to insult you like this in front of others. It is not making her look better, even though it may feel to her for a moment that it is. Pray for those who persecute you and bless them. So that would include your mom when she does this to you. I know that there are probably many good things about your mom too and that you love her, but this is obviously a horrible character slight on her part and you do not have to like it! Forgive her, yes, but you do not have to like it, and furthermore, her words are deceitful, it's not true, because you are perfect just the way you are ! <3

 

[Shutterbug]

Have you ever walked through a store and noticed personnel standing on ladders to reach for things above them? When navies had battleships, the people assigned to clean the largest gun barrels were the smallest men, not the biggest. Read up on Mary Slessor. My understanding is that she was small in physical build, but made up for it in attitude and heart. Cheers, John

 

[angel rose]

Angel Rose, I want to tell you that God loves you and you're precious. Yes, you forgive your mom each time. But I'm not really concerned with her here. I'm concerned about you, for you are a wonderful and special young lady who deserves love and acceptance from her parent. God, as your parent, accepts you in every way! You're beautiful! You smile and laugh are one of a kind, your shortness is cute, or He wouldn't have made you that way! Your mom has some deep insecurities to insult you like this in front of others. It is not making her look better, even though it may feel to her for a moment that it is. Pray for those who persecute you and bless them. So that would include your mom when she does this to you. I know that there are probably many good things about your mom too and that you love her, but this is obviously a horrible character slight on her part and you do not have to like it! Forgive her, yes, but you do not have to like it, and furthermore, her words are deceitful, it's not true, because you are perfect just the way you are ! <3

I really dont know what to say, reading that just made me smile so much ! Thankyou, thank you for making me feel so much better.

 

[angel rose]

Have you ever walked through a store and noticed personnel standing on ladders to reach for things above them? When navies had battleships, the people assigned to clean the largest gun barrels were the smallest men, not the biggest. Read up on Mary Slessor. My understanding is that she was small in physical build, but made up for it in attitude and heart. Cheers, John

Thank you John, thanks for making me feel better about my height

 

[Dreamer]

Angel Rose, my mom used to shame me in front of people when I was a child. Things that could have been taken care of just fine at home in a room privately spoken between mother and daughter were brought up in front of her friends and me when she hadn't personally said anything to me about the matters. I remember how shocked and embarrassed I felt each time. I've forgiven her, but it did some damage and God has healed me and healed our relationship. My mom is in heaven. My mom didn't have a good childhood and was simply, at times, practicing things on me that had been done to her. I have good memories too, which come to the forefront more often as time goes by. The very fact and reality that has helped me the most is that I now know that my Heavenly Father loves me dearly and always has! He's always been looking out for me, even in my childhood when I didn't have a whole lot of awareness of Him.

 

[angel rose]

Angel Rose, my mom used to shame me in front of people when I was a child. Things that could have been taken care of just fine at home in a room privately spoken between mother and daughter were brought up in front of her friends and me when she hadn't personally said anything to me about the matters. I remember how shocked and embarrassed I felt each time. I've forgiven her, but it did some damage and God has healed me and healed our relationship. My mom is in heaven. My mom didn't have a good childhood and was simply, at times, practicing things on me that had been done to her. I have good memories too, which come to the forefront more often as time goes by. The very fact and reality that has helped me the most is that I now know that my Heavenly Father loves me dearly and always has! He's always been looking out for me, even in my childhood when I didn't have a whole lot of awareness of Him.

Yes, thats very true. Sometimes I feel extremely damaged and hurt by what my mum says and fail to realise that no matter what happens, there is a God up there who loves me more than anyone. From now I'll acknowledge that and try to forgive my mum. Its difficult, but I'll try and forgive

 

[Dreamer]

Again, my concern is with you, sweet Angel Rose. Not with your mom. It is your mom's responsibility to raise you in love and discipline, and shaming you in front of others is neither true love nor true discipline. I want you to know that God loves you and He can turn this situation around. The pressure should not be so much on you as the child to forgive, as the pressure should be on her as a parent to parent correctly. I am assuming that you are a teen. I am praying for your mom and for you. I love you. You are not responsible for this abuse. It may be mild abuse, but it still is abuse, and it hurts! You already admitted it has damaged you.

Dear Father, May You hold Angel Rose up and defend her, may the angels be around her, (surround her with them, Lord,) and may this situation change. Bless her, God. Bless Angel Rose in a mighty way and heal every part of her broken heart. Use her as a messenger of hope to her mother and to others. Empower her with your love, wisdom, and peace, in all things, in your holy and blessed name, Jesus, amen.

"Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted." Matthew 5:4

"But I say unto you, 'Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; that ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.' " 5:44, 45

 

[Rev T.S.Perkins]

angel ..first i want to say as a parent myself we tend to not always be aware of how hurtful we can be sometimes . tell her that you are wounded by her words toward you !..you are as God created you and when she attacks youre looks she is saying God didnt do you justice .!its a lie ,,perfect as you are i would say ....Now that is said let me add..you are as God made you for reason ,! dont let anyone or any thing take that from you ..designed and equiped as you are for a reason let The Lord show you what you were created for and ask Him to lead you to youre calling before heaven and God that he may be glorified in you ////and see what the Lord can do with what the world says come up short ,,,,Sorry no pun intended.....!Lord bless you and keep you during this rocky time of finding out who you are in Christ ..16 is a hard age ...Rev

 

[angel rose]

Again, my concern is with you, sweet Angel Rose. Not with your mom. It is your mom's responsibility to raise you in love and discipline, and shaming you in front of others is neither true love nor true discipline. I want you to know that God loves you and He can turn this situation around. The pressure should not be so much on you as the child to forgive, as the pressure should be on her as a parent to parent correctly. I am assuming that you are a teen. I am praying for your mom and for you. I love you. You are not responsible for this abuse. It may be mild abuse, but it still is abuse, and it hurts! You already admitted it has damaged you.

Dear Father, May You hold Angel Rose up and defend her, may the angels be around her, (surround her with them, Lord,) and may this situation change. Bless her, God. Bless Angel Rose in a mighty way and heal every part of her broken heart. Use her as a messenger of hope to her mother and to others. Empower her with your love, wisdom, and peace, in all things, in your holy and blessed name, Jesus, amen.

"Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted." Matthew 5:4

"But I say unto you, 'Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; that ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.' " 5:44, 45

I feel so blessed and happy that there are people out there, who are ready to care for me. Thank you so much for your support. Thankyou Lord.

 

[angel rose]

angel ..first i want to say as a parent myself we tend to not always be aware of how hurtful we can be sometimes . tell her that you are wounded by her words toward you !..you are as God created you and when she attacks youre looks she is saying God didnt do you justice .!its a lie ,,perfect as you are i would say ....Now that is said let me add..you are as God made you for reason ,! dont let anyone or any thing take that from you ..designed and equiped as you are for a reason let The Lord show you what you were created for and ask Him to lead you to youre calling before heaven and God that he may be glorified in you ////and see what the Lord can do with what the world says come up short ,,,,Sorry no pun intended.....!Lord bless you and keep you during this rocky time of finding out who you are in Christ ..16 is a hard age ...Rev

Thankyou so much for giving me a few wise words to think about. Thankyou

 

[Brighthouse]

Dear sister angel Rose 1 Samuel 16:7! Tell her this! Now as you know sis, the enemy can use people to, in our lives,and the best way to have them change there words to you,is to give them words Jesus himself spoke to others! Then say I wonder what the Lord sees in your heart mom? nice of course! hehe To strengthen your feeling and emotion sis and we sure all have need of that! We MUST!! Get into, and stay into the word so,when the enemy looks to use someone against our stature or character you always have an answer for them!

Here sister is a great example from Jesus himself! In Matt 3:17 A voice from heaven said " This is my BELOVED SON in whom I am well pleased,and what was the first thing the devil said to Jesus?? Matt 4:3 He left out the words my beloved son!! Know why? because anyone who knows they are loved has NO FEAR!!( 1 john 4:17-19!!) Jesus quoted the Word!verse 4 Jesus quoted from Deut 8:3!)the devil again came at Jesus in verse 6 again leaving out words spoken in Psalms 91:11-12! Jesus quoted his Word again!( deut 6:16!)

One more time the devil looked to tempt him,and once again Jesus being God in the flesh who could have just told the enemy this, spoke his own word yet again!! verse 10 ( deut 6:13 and 10:20!) Did Jesus do this for no reason? Of course not sister! Jesus always has purpose, and we his children do to! Jesus spoke these things for our example! For can our own words make the enemy take flight??Never mine sis! ( psalm 138:2) Jesus and his word are the same, and his words are as important as his very own character and blood!

And for us his children, we are to follow his very example so no one can ever hurt our feeling! It is not that you are mad at your mom! It is that you no longer become afraid of her sis! Her words can cause you to fear as no one has to tell you! Because she seems to never have any kind words to you,and do you know why this is sis? Because she is so insecure in herself about her own faith! Truth can sometimes be tough to swallow and like meat, sometimes very tough to chew as well! If this sounds a bit bold sis,it is!

Because I went through the very same as you did with a so called friend of mine! He stopped after a few days of speaking Jesus to him! LOL So will your mom! Then they will seek you out for there own help! And now sis you have something to give them to help them in there own insecure faith! It is sister what love does!( 1 cor 13:4-8) You are not doing this to be mean to mom!!You are doing this to protect yourself from having the enemy speaking through her! ( eph 6:12-20!!) No where does Jesus ever tell us to ever take off our armor he gave us sis!! NO PLACE! You know why to! One last promise sis!

Our speech can be seasoned with grace,when we look to use God's words and not ours,and!! you will always know how to respond to!!( Colossians 4:6!!) Spoken in love not in anger sis,spoken in established confidence in our Jesus ,not in boastful pride or strife! We know the difference between the flesh and spirit sis!!( gal 5:16-26!!) Every blessing to you sis! Remember this scripture sis!! ( psalm 27:13!!) I would have despaired unless I HAD BELIEVED!!!! that I would see the goodness of God in the land of the living! You are in that land now sis, and we who love you in and by our Jesus, share your pain and your VICTORY!!!! Through our Jesus! We are not moving to victory sis,we in Christ always move from it!! amen!! ( rom 8:31 and verses 37-39!) truth keeps us free as well as sets us free sis! amen

 

[angel rose]

Dear sister angel Rose 1 Samuel 16:7! Tell her this! Now as you know sis, the enemy can use people to, in our lives,and the best way to have them change there words to you,is to give them words Jesus himself spoke to others! Then say I wonder what the Lord sees in your heart mom? nice of course! hehe To strengthen your feeling and emotion sis and we sure all have need of that! We MUST!! Get into, and stay into the word so,when the enemy looks to use someone against our stature or character you always have an answer for them!

Here sister is a great example from Jesus himself! In Matt 3:17 A voice from heaven said " This is my BELOVED SON in whom I am well pleased,and what was the first thing the devil said to Jesus?? Matt 4:3 He left out the words my beloved son!! Know why? because anyone who knows they are loved has NO FEAR!!( 1 john 4:17-19!!) Jesus quoted the Word!verse 4 Jesus quoted from Deut 8:3!)the devil again came at Jesus in verse 6 again leaving out words spoken in Psalms 91:11-12! Jesus quoted his Word again!( deut 6:16!)

One more time the devil looked to tempt him,and once again Jesus being God in the flesh who could have just told the enemy this, spoke his own word yet again!! verse 10 ( deut 6:13 and 10:20!) Did Jesus do this for no reason? Of course not sister! Jesus always has purpose, and we his children do to! Jesus spoke these things for our example! For can our own words make the enemy take flight??Never mine sis! ( psalm 138:2) Jesus and his word are the same, and his words are as important as his very own character and blood!

And for us his children, we are to follow his very example so no one can ever hurt our feeling! It is not that you are mad at your mom! It is that you no longer become afraid of her sis! Her words can cause you to fear as no one has to tell you! Because she seems to never have any kind words to you,and do you know why this is sis? Because she is so insecure in herself about her own faith! Truth can sometimes be tough to swallow and like meat, sometimes very tough to chew as well! If this sounds a bit bold sis,it is!

Because I went through the very same as you did with a so called friend of mine! He stopped after a few days of speaking Jesus to him! LOL So will your mom! Then they will seek you out for there own help! And now sis you have something to give them to help them in there own insecure faith! It is sister what love does!( 1 cor 13:4-8) You are not doing this to be mean to mom!!You are doing this to protect yourself from having the enemy speaking through her! ( eph 6:12-20!!) No where does Jesus ever tell us to ever take off our armor he gave us sis!! NO PLACE! You know why to! One last promise sis!

Our speech can be seasoned with grace,when we look to use God's words and not ours,and!! you will always know how to respond to!!( Colossians 4:6!!) Spoken in love not in anger sis,spoken in established confidence in our Jesus ,not in boastful pride or strife! We know the difference between the flesh and spirit sis!!( gal 5:16-26!!) Every blessing to you sis! Remember this scripture sis!! ( psalm 27:13!!) I would have despaired unless I HAD BELIEVED!!!! that I would see the goodness of God in the land of the living! You are in that land now sis, and we who love you in and by our Jesus, share your pain and your VICTORY!!!! Through our Jesus! We are not moving to victory sis,we in Christ always move from it!! amen!! ( rom 8:31 and verses 37-39!) truth keeps us free as well as sets us free sis! amen

Your words are so healing. I thank you so much for being there for me. After reading this I feel stronger, much stronger. Thank you brother, I love you

 

[SpiritLedEd]

Angel Rose, tell us a bit about your mom's family; how do they act toward each other? That may give a hint as to why she acts that way. It may be the way she was/is treated by them.

SLE

 

[angel rose]

Angel Rose, tell us a bit about your mom's family; how do they act toward each other? That may give a hint as to why she acts that way. It may be the way she was/is treated by them.

SLE

She has told me a few incidents of her being insulted and treated not so well when she was younger. Possibly that may have changed her ? Her family are fairly ok.