I know this is a Christian forum, and I hope you dont' mind an nonchristian posting because I wanted advice.
I have major doubts that the bible is true. I can honestly say now that I am not a Christian, that I don't believe in Jesus, and that after death there is nothing but a big, long sleep, and peace. But I wonder.
I have been struggling for a long time with depression. I am bipolar. I am on new meds, which are supposed to kick in soon, but the truth is that I am so tired of the ups and downs, the constant struggle, depression coming and hitting again and again. It's so hard.
So I have been wanting to commit suicide. Tonight, I wanted to die but wasn't sure, so I tied a cord and put the noose around my neck and bent my knees to hang myslelf- I did it that way so that I could get out of the noose at the last minute if I changed my mind. You know, partly I wanted to just see what hanging would be like, so I could stop as I started to black out, but I knew I could die if I waited too long to get out of it. Just as the noose tightened, the phone rang. It was a friend. I debated whether to finish hanging myself or to answer- I decided to answer. I had known my friend was going to call me, though I had thought it would be later that night.
If I had not stopped, if I had ignored the phone and let myself pass out and then hung there and died (I live alone so nowone would have saved me) would I be in hell now?
Is hell real? that is really my question. As a nonbeliever, would I have gone to a bad place to suffer or would my suffering be over had I died? If there is a chance that I would end up in hell, I should fight through this depression. Is there any evidence or proof? I mean proof that hell is real and that hte bible, in general, is true?
Will I go to hell if I commit suicide?
I have major doubts that the bible is true. I can honestly say now that I am not a Christian, that I don't believe in Jesus, and that after death there is nothing but a big, long sleep, and peace. But I wonder.
I have been struggling for a long time with depression. I am bipolar. I am on new meds, which are supposed to kick in soon, but the truth is that I am so tired of the ups and downs, the constant struggle, depression coming and hitting again and again. It's so hard.
So I have been wanting to commit suicide. Tonight, I wanted to die but wasn't sure, so I tied a cord and put the noose around my neck and bent my knees to hang myslelf- I did it that way so that I could get out of the noose at the last minute if I changed my mind. You know, partly I wanted to just see what hanging would be like, so I could stop as I started to black out, but I knew I could die if I waited too long to get out of it. Just as the noose tightened, the phone rang. It was a friend. I debated whether to finish hanging myself or to answer- I decided to answer. I had known my friend was going to call me, though I had thought it would be later that night.
If I had not stopped, if I had ignored the phone and let myself pass out and then hung there and died (I live alone so nowone would have saved me) would I be in hell now?
Is hell real? that is really my question. As a nonbeliever, would I have gone to a bad place to suffer or would my suffering be over had I died? If there is a chance that I would end up in hell, I should fight through this depression. Is there any evidence or proof? I mean proof that hell is real and that hte bible, in general, is true?
Will I go to hell if I commit suicide?