I'm not sure there is anything anyone here can do apart from pray but I need to share my situation. I don't feel able to share with people from church.
I have been married for 10 years. My wife has struggled since she had a nervous breakdown a year before we met. She is emotionally crippled. She cannot reach out in any way to me beyond the occasional smile. She has never kissed me or hugged me. She finds it difficult to even say positive things. Her fear about being emotionally vulnerable has led to so many physical symptoms over the years (several of which, praise God, he has healed her in the past year). She has has Irritable Bowel Syndrome since I have known her which means she sleeps really badly and is permanently tired or exhausted. A year ago she could not have dairy, sulphites, or wheat but God has healed her in this area. She has recognised now that she has ME and has learnt ways to deal with it which is good too.
However I have given up hope of us ever having a proper marriage. There is no way I would ever leave her especially as we have 2 kids. I know though that I struggle big time with loneliness and although God blesses me regularly sometimes I get very low.
I have stopped hoping for change because although I know that God can change things there too, I can't afford to entertain hope....I need to concentrate on how things are now not be hoping/expecting she will change as this leads to resentment and frustration. I don't know if this makes sense. This is where I made a mistake when we got married, I believed I could help her become herself again, without any fear, and got more and more disillusioned when it didn't happen - instead of accepting her as she was. In the end I made things worse which was just awful.
Anyway please pray for us. I have found this place to be a real blessing and there are some real people of faith here...thank you.
I have been married for 10 years. My wife has struggled since she had a nervous breakdown a year before we met. She is emotionally crippled. She cannot reach out in any way to me beyond the occasional smile. She has never kissed me or hugged me. She finds it difficult to even say positive things. Her fear about being emotionally vulnerable has led to so many physical symptoms over the years (several of which, praise God, he has healed her in the past year). She has has Irritable Bowel Syndrome since I have known her which means she sleeps really badly and is permanently tired or exhausted. A year ago she could not have dairy, sulphites, or wheat but God has healed her in this area. She has recognised now that she has ME and has learnt ways to deal with it which is good too.
However I have given up hope of us ever having a proper marriage. There is no way I would ever leave her especially as we have 2 kids. I know though that I struggle big time with loneliness and although God blesses me regularly sometimes I get very low.
I have stopped hoping for change because although I know that God can change things there too, I can't afford to entertain hope....I need to concentrate on how things are now not be hoping/expecting she will change as this leads to resentment and frustration. I don't know if this makes sense. This is where I made a mistake when we got married, I believed I could help her become herself again, without any fear, and got more and more disillusioned when it didn't happen - instead of accepting her as she was. In the end I made things worse which was just awful.
Anyway please pray for us. I have found this place to be a real blessing and there are some real people of faith here...thank you.
