On this day at 4 am I was suicidal and on pills along with alcohol. I went swimming with a stranger and was unable to swim because the undertow was very strong. before I knew it I was exhausted and being pulled under. it felt like something like a shadow arm was pulling me under this is when I had to ask the person I was with to help me, which he did and pulled me to shore. Still feeling like a failure, I ran, jumped off a cliff and dove onto a rock whiich was under water in the river. This caused my head to crack open. Thanks be to our Lord and savior, creator and that person I am still alive. 911 was my first day of rehab and can now say that life is very much better.