"I know someone", they are in a loving commited relationship and have had sexual intercourse before marriage but the female feels guilty that it is not the Christian way. She has been married before and it was a disaster and is now divorced. So with her new relationship she doesn't know what God wants for her because she doesn't want to rush into marriage again. What should she do??
First things first. Welcome aboard Siianyde!
A lot of unknowns in what you've written.
We have a lot of assumptions here to deal with, which dictate much to what has happened to what should happen against what will happen. Besides the obvious actions that a person as a Christian should behave as. Regardless, we know as Christians know that the sexual intercourse before marriage is wrong, period. Normally, behavior is repeated. Meaning, more than likely she had per-maritial sex in her first marriage as well. You've explained nothing of the other person, so can't comment on that part. So the foundation they she is setting with her new partner is not starting out on a positive note already. How can one hope that good will come out of going against what God would want for us? Which of cause leads to.......
Do we assume that both of them are believers?
Do we assume in her previous marriage that both of them were believers?
If both are believers then they must first get right with God, before they even contemplate marriage. Marriage is a covenant between each other and God. If one expects to have a successful marriage, then Christ Jesus must come first to each of them, and continue so into marriage. When problems crop up, and they do. She should be able to confirm this just from the fact that her first marriage ended in divorce, which is another issue entirely. Each of them should know that the first place the other will go when these problems do arise is to the Lord, in prayer. When couples make a habit of doing this in their marriage, it helps tremendously in keeping each other covered with God's Grace and blessing for that union. That is where the source of our hope, in all things began, and continues every day. Why go to friends, even the church ministry, when you haven't gotten down on your knees to pray first. The Holy Spirit might guide them to someone in ministry to assist, but one does not know until one asks.
So what should she do? Create separation with this other person. Keep it social with other people around. Double date. Attend functions where they won't be alone. Tough once intercourse has happened, because it will be easier to continue to justify having it again. Each time justified by self. "I love him or her", "we intend to be marriage", the things we tell ourselves so we can do the things we want to do, even if God disapproves, is endless.
Keep in mind, that the conviction she might be having, might not only be from the previous marriage, that is if she's saved. It could also be the Holy Spirit, letting her know that she's doing wrong.
There is more on this subject around TJ. Marriage, can be difficult, but done with Jesus Christ as the head of the family for both. It can be a great blessing. I have been so blessed now for 30 years. My own experiences, and those I've seen in other marriages, tell me that habit forming knee time provides the greatest success in marriage, even when the times get rough.
Hope it has helped some.
YBIC
C4E
Below are only some scripture verses that might give perspective about marriage. I'm sure there are many more, to include ones concerning per-maritial sex. One thing you can know for sure. Scripture doesn't tap dance around the subject.
Genesis 2:18, 23-24
Proverbs 18:22
2 Corinthians 6:14
Ephesians 5:21-22
1 Peter 3:7
Ephesians 5:25
Ephesians 5:33
Hebrews 13:4
Proverbs 5:18-19
1 Corinthians 7:3-7
Ecclesiastes 9:9