Yennee
Member
- Joined
- Aug 7, 2019
- Messages
- 72
Hello,
I am putting this under prayer requests, because I am tired of the suffering. I search, I read, contemplate, pray, fast, and still these things were on me as the mill to the grain, and I am sifted as fine flour. __ Thinking this, I hope to be a fine loaf for ABBA ( Father ).
*Long-Winded Warning: Read This*
I have experienced other miracles and wonders, such as pouring rain so severe that a sunny day became *actually impossible* to see through the windshield, and we were parked at a light, about to turn. I asked, "Let up the rain", I got a no no, "But why?", correction "let up the rain", "okay", "Let up the rain!" I was recently Saved, and had no doubt or hesitation, and I was in late teens or early 20s. The rain instantly let up to nearly gone -- a sprinkle.
Nonetheless, I am constantly faced with disorders that are or can be moderately to severely physically, mentally (ability to solve), emotionally, socially, psychologically (wares on mind) impairing, and spiritually grieving (word? I wanna scream, cry, give up!), frustrating.
Can I simply pray away all my problems if *only* I had the faith?
Which of these, if any, are demons, curses, generational curses, or otherwise?
When should I accept that prayer, fasting, reading, and praying doesn't make it all stop, and I'm not a faithless / faith-lacking heathen, or double-minded?
Where does the expected Christian experience of spiritual torment end, and a bigger problem begin?
When is it something I need to come to a better realization, understanding, and acknowledgement of, such as finding out false teachings, or exorcism is needed?
When should I fast to resolve a matter, in what way, and how long?
When is it faith to continue life as normal and not let it get to me, verses it being faith to do something about it?
*Long-Winded Warning: Skip Below, if Overwhelmed*
There may be excellent threads on here to comfort me, inspire me, and help me through a rough patch, and plenty of YouTube videos, and countless Google Searched resources that boost me; but I and my brother still suffer, personally. So, please, I am asking , as the scripture says, for the prayers of the saints ( " Pray for one another " , " bear one another's burdens " Bible Gateway passage: Galatians 6:2, James 5:16 - King James Version ). Tips, Search Terms: " bible, bible definition, Christian " before your quotes or questions in a browser. If struggling with searches, focus on the key terms or concepts of importance, and ignore sentences. Filler words such as " to, the " help little to none. Hopefully, this will remind to post on How to Use a Search Engine later; but where?
__ I am diagnosed with:
Severe Autistim.
I, both parents, brother, relatives, ancestors __ Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) -- mine is moderate to severe
Face Blind ( Prosopagnosia ) -- formerly severe -- YAH healed! !
Tourette's Syndrome -- mild
Intrusive Thoughts
Severe Depressive Disorder -- no further clarity
Severe Anxiety Disorder -- no further clarity
Unknown Immunological Disorder -- see SSS
Seizures -- while already sleeping, or under certain, excessive environmental conditions
__ Pending Diagnoses ( suspected to outright proven, but the right human authority hasn't signed off on it, yet ) :
Gentically varified inbred, resulting in XXXX Disorder
Endocrine assessment
Genetic assessment
Further metabolic assessments
Further immunocompromised assessments
Solanine Sensitivity Syndrome ( SSS ) \\ Nightshade Intolerance / Allergy \\ Solanine Toxicity Disorder ( STD -- you can see why they haven't got a set name for it, yet! To note, that other one is now STI -- I for infection )
Feral Child -- mild ( they don't add the word Syndrome )
Pseudo-Orphan Child Syndrome ( Not Abandoned / Orphaned Child Syndrome )
__ Why I mention these:
I hear a heavy lean on beliefs about these things. Everything from " it's all demonic assault and curses " __ or distinguished: " mental, physical, spiritual -- all can be healed through the power of prayer, if *only* with undoubting faith through prayer and casting out in Jesus/Yahoshua' name " __ to " sometimes / oftentimes it's a *real* problem you simply have to live with. "
The LORD healed me in an instant from double pinkeye. _ My brother and I, *in agreement* in desperate *need* to eat together without contention ([for fellowship]), were able to simply eat a meal, containing things we *knew* would hurt us, and the instant he had the idea and prayed it wouldn't I *knew* in the spirit, it would not -- and it did not! _ The LORD, for the sake of allowing us to honor His High Sabbaths (New Moons, Passover), *when we pray* that the wine (which I am fatally intolerant to!) will be as "medicine to us and do us no harm" then causes us to *feel/perceive* the same covering / buffering sensation as the meal occasion, and experience no alcohol induced side effects nor immunocompromised responses, but medicine ( I'm serious -- but it *only* works when *pray for it* in our understanding, undoubting confirmation, for to *Honor YAH*, without drunkenness! ).
My brother was told, with the feeling/perception of spiritual dread, that if I ate Goji Berries, I would "die." I simply searched up side effects, and found out they are from the Nightshade family, and contain Solanine. Looking into my diet, I found seemingly everything I was eating, especially at that time, to contain Nightshades. I had previously suffered bowl blockage, inexplicably, when, in a bought of financial difficulty, we were eating only potatoes (almost nothing else). I removed Nightshades from my diet, and I was healed. I was 25 and needed a cane to walk, was hunched over perpetually, suffered horrific lower back pain, obesity and weight loss issues, migraines, severe water retention, severe crippling menstrual cycles, Charlie Horses, and more. I can now stand upright, walk without being home-ridden, regular (I used to skip months) and notably lighter menstrual cycles, and all these things have healed gradually to completely. This has been an ongoing miracle for me, and I would say for my brother, as well. __ To note, the financial, emotional, social, and psychological stress of working so hard to eat a (pretty much paleo) diet, wares on us, and we oftentimes give in to eating things for comfort, sanity, expense, grief over constant arguing.
[clipped to top]
I anger people so bad they threaten my life or bodily harm, and I need have little to do with them over a period of time, or I have a relationship or developing relationship with them.
I can't eat out or with others, lest my dietary restrictions offend.
I have panic attacks, even over things I learned in scripture and how I am falling short.
Even after I come to a conclusion and resolution, the matter wears on me (and physical reminders the more so).
I find myself repenting repeatedly for old sins, and wanting or trying to make up for them, especially if items remind me. And I wonder if there is some lesson I didn't learn or I am or will as yet fail to do better.
I try, and I see ABBA working in my life, I improve, but I struggle when others can't seem to see it.
I am told, "you're not / I don't believe you're / you can't be / hearing God [on this / that matter]" , or, "God isn't like that! God doesn't want that for you!"
I am exhausted by having the faith for miracles, reading scripture often, and even daily +, fasting from food and water for days, praying constantly, researching Christian Cures and prayers, miracles, confirmations, and experiences, and being left wondering where I am lacking.
Can I be an alcoholic, live on cake, fornicate, fantasize about murdering people for the pleasure of it, esteem myself superior, blaspheme to my hearts content, steal, deny charity, or repeat old sins perpetually, or even indefinitely, NO.
But I have grown up with learning disabilities, dietary restrictions, medical and other issues, and little treatment. The bible and even New Testament shows people *not* being healed and cleansed of *everything*. Can God heal a stab wound? Yes. Many true, Saved believers died from them. Most Yokefolk, when faced with sickness, fire, lions, have died! Is it all faithlessness? Job lived, but his children and servants did not, yet, should we assume none of them were True Followers? Paul murdered, slaughtered the faithful, and they did not escape his hand; yet, he was forgiven, and he, afterwards, was not killed for those crimes, by the families of those loved ones, but allowed to endure a new being.
I have blasphemous, intrusive thoughts run through my mind. I disown them, cast them, and whatever devils out, but I am still bothered.
I struggle to communicate with others without causing offense, and Paul did, too.
I can eat poison without harm, at all, but I still suffer consequences if I try to live on the foods I grew up with?
I was abused, neglected, molested, and denied medical and other care at the risk of my own life, and I am still learning how to interact with other human beings; but I remain socially awkard andw offensive, and easily used and hurt.
Legal Disclaimer: As the individual suffering these conditions, I authorize my legal right to disclose this information as I see fit.
I am putting this under prayer requests, because I am tired of the suffering. I search, I read, contemplate, pray, fast, and still these things were on me as the mill to the grain, and I am sifted as fine flour. __ Thinking this, I hope to be a fine loaf for ABBA ( Father ).
*Long-Winded Warning: Read This*
I have experienced other miracles and wonders, such as pouring rain so severe that a sunny day became *actually impossible* to see through the windshield, and we were parked at a light, about to turn. I asked, "Let up the rain", I got a no no, "But why?", correction "let up the rain", "okay", "Let up the rain!" I was recently Saved, and had no doubt or hesitation, and I was in late teens or early 20s. The rain instantly let up to nearly gone -- a sprinkle.
Nonetheless, I am constantly faced with disorders that are or can be moderately to severely physically, mentally (ability to solve), emotionally, socially, psychologically (wares on mind) impairing, and spiritually grieving (word? I wanna scream, cry, give up!), frustrating.
Can I simply pray away all my problems if *only* I had the faith?
Which of these, if any, are demons, curses, generational curses, or otherwise?
When should I accept that prayer, fasting, reading, and praying doesn't make it all stop, and I'm not a faithless / faith-lacking heathen, or double-minded?
Where does the expected Christian experience of spiritual torment end, and a bigger problem begin?
When is it something I need to come to a better realization, understanding, and acknowledgement of, such as finding out false teachings, or exorcism is needed?
When should I fast to resolve a matter, in what way, and how long?
When is it faith to continue life as normal and not let it get to me, verses it being faith to do something about it?
*Long-Winded Warning: Skip Below, if Overwhelmed*
There may be excellent threads on here to comfort me, inspire me, and help me through a rough patch, and plenty of YouTube videos, and countless Google Searched resources that boost me; but I and my brother still suffer, personally. So, please, I am asking , as the scripture says, for the prayers of the saints ( " Pray for one another " , " bear one another's burdens " Bible Gateway passage: Galatians 6:2, James 5:16 - King James Version ). Tips, Search Terms: " bible, bible definition, Christian " before your quotes or questions in a browser. If struggling with searches, focus on the key terms or concepts of importance, and ignore sentences. Filler words such as " to, the " help little to none. Hopefully, this will remind to post on How to Use a Search Engine later; but where?
__ I am diagnosed with:
Severe Autistim.
I, both parents, brother, relatives, ancestors __ Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) -- mine is moderate to severe
Face Blind ( Prosopagnosia ) -- formerly severe -- YAH healed! !
Tourette's Syndrome -- mild
Intrusive Thoughts
Severe Depressive Disorder -- no further clarity
Severe Anxiety Disorder -- no further clarity
Unknown Immunological Disorder -- see SSS
Seizures -- while already sleeping, or under certain, excessive environmental conditions
__ Pending Diagnoses ( suspected to outright proven, but the right human authority hasn't signed off on it, yet ) :
Gentically varified inbred, resulting in XXXX Disorder
Endocrine assessment
Genetic assessment
Further metabolic assessments
Further immunocompromised assessments
Solanine Sensitivity Syndrome ( SSS ) \\ Nightshade Intolerance / Allergy \\ Solanine Toxicity Disorder ( STD -- you can see why they haven't got a set name for it, yet! To note, that other one is now STI -- I for infection )
Feral Child -- mild ( they don't add the word Syndrome )
Pseudo-Orphan Child Syndrome ( Not Abandoned / Orphaned Child Syndrome )
__ Why I mention these:
I hear a heavy lean on beliefs about these things. Everything from " it's all demonic assault and curses " __ or distinguished: " mental, physical, spiritual -- all can be healed through the power of prayer, if *only* with undoubting faith through prayer and casting out in Jesus/Yahoshua' name " __ to " sometimes / oftentimes it's a *real* problem you simply have to live with. "
The LORD healed me in an instant from double pinkeye. _ My brother and I, *in agreement* in desperate *need* to eat together without contention ([for fellowship]), were able to simply eat a meal, containing things we *knew* would hurt us, and the instant he had the idea and prayed it wouldn't I *knew* in the spirit, it would not -- and it did not! _ The LORD, for the sake of allowing us to honor His High Sabbaths (New Moons, Passover), *when we pray* that the wine (which I am fatally intolerant to!) will be as "medicine to us and do us no harm" then causes us to *feel/perceive* the same covering / buffering sensation as the meal occasion, and experience no alcohol induced side effects nor immunocompromised responses, but medicine ( I'm serious -- but it *only* works when *pray for it* in our understanding, undoubting confirmation, for to *Honor YAH*, without drunkenness! ).
My brother was told, with the feeling/perception of spiritual dread, that if I ate Goji Berries, I would "die." I simply searched up side effects, and found out they are from the Nightshade family, and contain Solanine. Looking into my diet, I found seemingly everything I was eating, especially at that time, to contain Nightshades. I had previously suffered bowl blockage, inexplicably, when, in a bought of financial difficulty, we were eating only potatoes (almost nothing else). I removed Nightshades from my diet, and I was healed. I was 25 and needed a cane to walk, was hunched over perpetually, suffered horrific lower back pain, obesity and weight loss issues, migraines, severe water retention, severe crippling menstrual cycles, Charlie Horses, and more. I can now stand upright, walk without being home-ridden, regular (I used to skip months) and notably lighter menstrual cycles, and all these things have healed gradually to completely. This has been an ongoing miracle for me, and I would say for my brother, as well. __ To note, the financial, emotional, social, and psychological stress of working so hard to eat a (pretty much paleo) diet, wares on us, and we oftentimes give in to eating things for comfort, sanity, expense, grief over constant arguing.
[clipped to top]
I anger people so bad they threaten my life or bodily harm, and I need have little to do with them over a period of time, or I have a relationship or developing relationship with them.
I can't eat out or with others, lest my dietary restrictions offend.
I have panic attacks, even over things I learned in scripture and how I am falling short.
Even after I come to a conclusion and resolution, the matter wears on me (and physical reminders the more so).
I find myself repenting repeatedly for old sins, and wanting or trying to make up for them, especially if items remind me. And I wonder if there is some lesson I didn't learn or I am or will as yet fail to do better.
I try, and I see ABBA working in my life, I improve, but I struggle when others can't seem to see it.
I am told, "you're not / I don't believe you're / you can't be / hearing God [on this / that matter]" , or, "God isn't like that! God doesn't want that for you!"
I am exhausted by having the faith for miracles, reading scripture often, and even daily +, fasting from food and water for days, praying constantly, researching Christian Cures and prayers, miracles, confirmations, and experiences, and being left wondering where I am lacking.
Can I be an alcoholic, live on cake, fornicate, fantasize about murdering people for the pleasure of it, esteem myself superior, blaspheme to my hearts content, steal, deny charity, or repeat old sins perpetually, or even indefinitely, NO.
But I have grown up with learning disabilities, dietary restrictions, medical and other issues, and little treatment. The bible and even New Testament shows people *not* being healed and cleansed of *everything*. Can God heal a stab wound? Yes. Many true, Saved believers died from them. Most Yokefolk, when faced with sickness, fire, lions, have died! Is it all faithlessness? Job lived, but his children and servants did not, yet, should we assume none of them were True Followers? Paul murdered, slaughtered the faithful, and they did not escape his hand; yet, he was forgiven, and he, afterwards, was not killed for those crimes, by the families of those loved ones, but allowed to endure a new being.
I have blasphemous, intrusive thoughts run through my mind. I disown them, cast them, and whatever devils out, but I am still bothered.
I struggle to communicate with others without causing offense, and Paul did, too.
I can eat poison without harm, at all, but I still suffer consequences if I try to live on the foods I grew up with?
I was abused, neglected, molested, and denied medical and other care at the risk of my own life, and I am still learning how to interact with other human beings; but I remain socially awkard andw offensive, and easily used and hurt.
Legal Disclaimer: As the individual suffering these conditions, I authorize my legal right to disclose this information as I see fit.