purpleworm23
Member
- Joined
- Jun 11, 2021
- Messages
- 4
Hi everyone.
recently I’ve been distressed and having intrusive thoughts about the unpardonable sin. I read about it and it scared me deeply. It tormented me so bad I couldn’t sleep and my heart would race.
I decided today to take back my thoughts. Whenever they came, I said how much I love the Holy Spirit. I called the Holy Spirit my friend an comforter and said I would never deny or reject the Holy Spirit.
I was thinking in the car how badly I want to be free from these thoughts. I want to be careless and happy like other people. This is the part where I’m scared I did it.
I imagined myself in the future, looking back on this season and laughing. In the thought, I imagined myself saying. “I don’t know why I was so scared/obsessed over these thoughts”.. and then went on to call the Holy Spirit a ridiculing word.
this thought instantly disgusted and scared me. I prayed to God for forgiveness, that I may never sink into such a mindset. I told Him that this mindset isn’t what I wanted— just a mindset where I wasn’t obsessing and having intrusive thoughts. Even in the back of my mind, what I was intending to say was directed towards the unforgivable sin, and not the Holy Spirit. But in my mind, I imagined myself saying it to the Holy Spirit. It was like a recording was already playing and I knew it was going to say something bad, yet couldn’t pause it. Like it was going though my mind without being in the forefront— as in, not an entirely lucid thought, but still there.
is this the unforgivable sin? I feel so lost. I love and appreciate the Holy Spirit, and I would never say such a thing. I don’t believe for a second that the Holy Spirit is anything negative and I certainly would not say anything like that out loud, yet I imagined myself saying it so carelessly and confident. Please help me. I prayed to God forgiveness and told Him that I would never honestly think, believe, or say such a thing. I take comfort in the fact that the thought of myself saying this disgusted and repulsed me, like I can’t be gone if this is how I feel about the thought of me saying it.
thank you for reading.
recently I’ve been distressed and having intrusive thoughts about the unpardonable sin. I read about it and it scared me deeply. It tormented me so bad I couldn’t sleep and my heart would race.
I decided today to take back my thoughts. Whenever they came, I said how much I love the Holy Spirit. I called the Holy Spirit my friend an comforter and said I would never deny or reject the Holy Spirit.
I was thinking in the car how badly I want to be free from these thoughts. I want to be careless and happy like other people. This is the part where I’m scared I did it.
I imagined myself in the future, looking back on this season and laughing. In the thought, I imagined myself saying. “I don’t know why I was so scared/obsessed over these thoughts”.. and then went on to call the Holy Spirit a ridiculing word.
this thought instantly disgusted and scared me. I prayed to God for forgiveness, that I may never sink into such a mindset. I told Him that this mindset isn’t what I wanted— just a mindset where I wasn’t obsessing and having intrusive thoughts. Even in the back of my mind, what I was intending to say was directed towards the unforgivable sin, and not the Holy Spirit. But in my mind, I imagined myself saying it to the Holy Spirit. It was like a recording was already playing and I knew it was going to say something bad, yet couldn’t pause it. Like it was going though my mind without being in the forefront— as in, not an entirely lucid thought, but still there.
is this the unforgivable sin? I feel so lost. I love and appreciate the Holy Spirit, and I would never say such a thing. I don’t believe for a second that the Holy Spirit is anything negative and I certainly would not say anything like that out loud, yet I imagined myself saying it so carelessly and confident. Please help me. I prayed to God forgiveness and told Him that I would never honestly think, believe, or say such a thing. I take comfort in the fact that the thought of myself saying this disgusted and repulsed me, like I can’t be gone if this is how I feel about the thought of me saying it.
thank you for reading.