When parents aren't in agreement on child-rearing

[Michali]

How is a parent supposed to train their children in the way of the Lord, when the other parent is not in agreement with what that means? I do not in any way try to imply that I am a better parent. I believe that the man is to be the head of the house and lead the family in God's way. I have tried to discuss my difference of opinions with my husband, but he thinks I go a little too overboard on some things...and maybe I do to some extent. How do I keep them safe from the world's influence without completely hiding them from it? I myself do not like my children watching mindless shows, or shows that teach things like reincarnation or so many other things that are completely contrary to God. Am I just going overboard or do I have to step up and take a stand? I do not know how to convince my husband that these things DO affect their beliefs, which are at such a crucial stage of development in their life. I feel like I've done wrong in not having taken a stand earlier, but what kind of stand am I rightly to take? I believe I'm to be submissive to my husband and his leading. I've tried to talk with him and to trust that God will show him the correct way to lead his family, but I'm concerned to a point of almost desperation, that my children are growing so quickly and I've seen little change in my husbands thoughts on these things. I'm seeing changes in my children, that I do not like; and I feel like it is absolutely necessary for a change. How do I enforce that my children not watch things that my husband allows them to watch, or is that even my place to "enforce"? How do I keep my children from watching these things, without trying to force my husband to follow my "rules" for the home? I feel like I'm wrong to not do something and I've even been guilty of watching these shows with them, more at first because I wanted to know what they were watching, to be better capable of teaching them the truth of those things; but at times, I do begin to find myself enjoying watching the shows as well. Even when my husband is not home, I tend to just allow them to watch what they're always allowed to watch when he IS here. I feel like they will only see me as being unfair if my husband and I are not in agreement. Please give me some good Biblical advice. Thank you.

 

[Hekuran]

here's a few ideas.

first, there is more than one way to shield your children from the worlds influence. Keeping them away from worldly influences is one way, but you will not be able to do that for them forever. You can also teach them to think in a Christian way about the things they see on television. Help them to question the values behind tv shows and prompt them to think about what their own values are. It is just possible to redeem the experience of watching a completely vacuous reality show so that it helps build your children's sense of their place in the world.

Second. Think about how your husband's mind works, the way that he forms opinions on things. Is he more receptive to moral argument, logical explanations, his own experience, or encouragement. What values does he hold dear, and what things might prevent those values being passed on to his children?

Third, if you are concerned to the point of desperation, then it is your husband's duty to respect that and respond to it. There is no biblical barrier to you explaining your concerns to your husband, and asking him to respect your views and the values that lie behind them.

I had four or five points before I started typing, but they escape me now.

I hope you can get this situation sorted.

 

[hischildaswell]

Believe Gods word, not mans; Rom 3:4God forbid: yea, let God be true, but every man a liar; as it is written, That thou mightest be justified in thy sayings, and mightest overcome when thou art judged.
Hubbie will be accountable to God for the family, not the wife, his is the final say, if he is wrong ,i.e. contrary to truth, he will answer for it here and in the future when/if the children go astray.

If you are not in a good church you should find one. if you do not know what that is ask me