Woman head of the family ????
- Thread starter mounty
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It is wrong sister but unfortunately some husbands are not able to do the job the husband is meant to around the home.
The Bible says the man is to be the head of the home. I know most times this does happen but sad to say there are women who seem to wear the trousers. Some men cannot handle money either to pay bills.
God bless
LLJ
:rainbow: :rose:
The Bible says the man is to be the head of the home. I know most times this does happen but sad to say there are women who seem to wear the trousers. Some men cannot handle money either to pay bills.
God bless
LLJ
:rainbow: :rose:
rjones
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In Proverbs 31:10-31 is a description of a virtuous woman and what makes her so. Kind of describes some of what your already doing. I pray that the levels of communication be increased between you and your husband and that a more balanced family walk of faith manifests for you.
Hi Mounty
God Bless you....Glad to see you are keeping in touch.....with Jesus
An excellent question, and so relevant in the society of today.
The bible is a book which sets out the 'ideal' Marriage is the ideal. The man, head of the home......the ideal. Scripture also informs that in ourselves we cannot always keep to the 'ideal's.
Reason being we are human and have to face the results, consequences of what we are. Thankfully Jesus came, suffered in our place, died in our stead, that we, frail mortals, human wrecks, that we are, might know Salvation from our sin, shortcoming, and acceptance in Christ. This is the important thing, "that we know Him, whom to know is life eternal"
But we reach out to what is best before God.....but acknowledge the where we are, and the weakness of the flesh, human nature.
We should strive. Paul the Apostle said that he had to bring his natural desire into subjection......1 Cor 9 : 27 Even the great man wrestled to reach the 'ideal'
My thoughts. Off the cuff
God Bless
God Bless you....Glad to see you are keeping in touch.....with Jesus
An excellent question, and so relevant in the society of today.
The bible is a book which sets out the 'ideal' Marriage is the ideal. The man, head of the home......the ideal. Scripture also informs that in ourselves we cannot always keep to the 'ideal's.
Reason being we are human and have to face the results, consequences of what we are. Thankfully Jesus came, suffered in our place, died in our stead, that we, frail mortals, human wrecks, that we are, might know Salvation from our sin, shortcoming, and acceptance in Christ. This is the important thing, "that we know Him, whom to know is life eternal"
But we reach out to what is best before God.....but acknowledge the where we are, and the weakness of the flesh, human nature.
We should strive. Paul the Apostle said that he had to bring his natural desire into subjection......1 Cor 9 : 27 Even the great man wrestled to reach the 'ideal'
My thoughts. Off the cuff
God Bless
Thank you all for your views
I am trying to encourage my husband to take more control over the home, but it seems he does not like the idea and is content with me running it. I pray he will want to become the head of our home in the future, as i would like to hand command over to my husband.
I am trying to encourage my husband to take more control over the home, but it seems he does not like the idea and is content with me running it. I pray he will want to become the head of our home in the future, as i would like to hand command over to my husband.
You are doing an excellent job in the running of the home. For this reason your devoted husband is happy to leave it to you.
The only suggestion I would offer, would be that if at any time a problem arose, or you were to feel stretched,....... let him know. Cometh the hour....cometh the man.... I am sure that at that point he will arise.....and go forth..........HaHaHa.....
God Bless You All
The only suggestion I would offer, would be that if at any time a problem arose, or you were to feel stretched,....... let him know. Cometh the hour....cometh the man.... I am sure that at that point he will arise.....and go forth..........HaHaHa.....
God Bless You All
Don't confuse administration with leadership
There is a difference between being trusted to administrate the functions of a household and leading it. The usual "contested" division is in finances so we'll look at that.
When people moved from primarily agrarian management to financial management (we count coins not cows), most women ended up doing the book-keeping for the house. The main reasons for this were 1) the women do the shopping, so the day-to-day numbers in the budget are more important to them than to their husbands and 2) most men don't want to come home and spend their "off" hours managing finances.
In my household, my husband is the sole wage earner. Even when this was not the case, he was and is the financial leader of our household -- but I manage the books (at his request). Just as my boss at work could demand figures and justifications from me at any time, I am always prepared to make report to my husband on any transaction involving the house. But he generally doesn't need to ask me much because I keep him up to date on changes and manage everything else as smoothly as possible.
Rent, food, electricity, and so on all get paid by me, but the values on those bills come from the creditors, not from any decision on my (or my husband's) part. I'm really not making any decisions. My husband chose our TV, internet, and cellular services -- I just write the check.
Leaving my husband to worry over the minutae of grocery shopping isn't giving him leadership -- it's giving him headaches. He has said he crunches more than enough numbers at work without having to handle finances and books in the hours when he should be resting at home.
Having said that, it would never occur to me to make any significant purchase without consulting him and getting his permission. Even when I was also drawing a paycheck, this was the way things were done, and I've never felt "slighted" because of it.
Women should not be afraid they are acting in an ungodly manner just because their husbands have entrusted the day-to-day management of the family finances to them. If the husband gives the job to the wife, then she is doing as he wishes her to do to manage those things for him.
Any woman who finds she has to be both administrator and leader because her husband will not take up his role should also not be afraid of her own conduct, so long as she finds herself in the role in good faith, and not becasue she manipulated or demanded her way into it. Someone has to lead, and if the man has abdicated his responsibility, then he loses his authority. Women in this position should pray without ceasing for their husbands, talk to their pastors about how to get their husbands more involved in heading the family, and keep things running as smoothly as they can until the men step up and do right by them.
There is a difference between being trusted to administrate the functions of a household and leading it. The usual "contested" division is in finances so we'll look at that.
When people moved from primarily agrarian management to financial management (we count coins not cows), most women ended up doing the book-keeping for the house. The main reasons for this were 1) the women do the shopping, so the day-to-day numbers in the budget are more important to them than to their husbands and 2) most men don't want to come home and spend their "off" hours managing finances.
In my household, my husband is the sole wage earner. Even when this was not the case, he was and is the financial leader of our household -- but I manage the books (at his request). Just as my boss at work could demand figures and justifications from me at any time, I am always prepared to make report to my husband on any transaction involving the house. But he generally doesn't need to ask me much because I keep him up to date on changes and manage everything else as smoothly as possible.
Rent, food, electricity, and so on all get paid by me, but the values on those bills come from the creditors, not from any decision on my (or my husband's) part. I'm really not making any decisions. My husband chose our TV, internet, and cellular services -- I just write the check.
Leaving my husband to worry over the minutae of grocery shopping isn't giving him leadership -- it's giving him headaches. He has said he crunches more than enough numbers at work without having to handle finances and books in the hours when he should be resting at home.
Having said that, it would never occur to me to make any significant purchase without consulting him and getting his permission. Even when I was also drawing a paycheck, this was the way things were done, and I've never felt "slighted" because of it.
Women should not be afraid they are acting in an ungodly manner just because their husbands have entrusted the day-to-day management of the family finances to them. If the husband gives the job to the wife, then she is doing as he wishes her to do to manage those things for him.
Any woman who finds she has to be both administrator and leader because her husband will not take up his role should also not be afraid of her own conduct, so long as she finds herself in the role in good faith, and not becasue she manipulated or demanded her way into it. Someone has to lead, and if the man has abdicated his responsibility, then he loses his authority. Women in this position should pray without ceasing for their husbands, talk to their pastors about how to get their husbands more involved in heading the family, and keep things running as smoothly as they can until the men step up and do right by them.
SpiritLedEd
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Interesting post, Janette. I'd like to point out that our personalities tend to be shaped around our God-given talents. For instance, people who are gifted with leadership talents are those who step to the forefront and who attract people to themselves in healthy ways. People who are good at record keeping are those who are detail oriented and enjoy problem solving, but are not necessarily capable of being leaders.
To try to force a man into a leadership in terms of telling others what to do merely because he is a man could be akin to trying to force a square peg into a round hole.
SLE
To try to force a man into a leadership in terms of telling others what to do merely because he is a man could be akin to trying to force a square peg into a round hole.
SLE
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I am like Janette, I have certain tasks that my husband asks me to do as he hasn't got enough time in the day with work and the commute involved. Also I wouldnt want him to get even more exhausted with things that I could do from home.
I think both husband and wife have tofind a balance and decide what is the best way of managing the household and making important decisions.
Dreamer
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My husband does not enjoy doing the finances; it's just an extra stress on a man who already has a full time job plus part time in National Guard. He knows I pinch pennies and he trusts me to get utilities, car payments, house payment done. It is my way of serving him and serving the family. It gives my hubby more time to spend with me and the kids.
If he protested it, I wouldn't do it.
The husband is to have spiritual leadership of the home. So we wives better be praying for our husbands, encouraging them and blessing them.
Please note: a husband who is not a christian is not capable of being a spiritual leader of a christian home.
I am fortunate that my husband is a christian
If he protested it, I wouldn't do it.
The husband is to have spiritual leadership of the home. So we wives better be praying for our husbands, encouraging them and blessing them.
Please note: a husband who is not a christian is not capable of being a spiritual leader of a christian home.
I am fortunate that my husband is a christian
God can change the shape of any peg
In principle I would agree.
Everyone has gifts and weaknesses. God didn't put us all here to all be good at exactly the same things. This is why I don't think it's at all unreasonable for a husband to choose to delagate *a portion* of his authority to his wife.
But sometimes God demands more from us than an adherence to simple principles.
The mandate to be the leader of the family comes to all men not from me, but from God. I'm not trying to push any square pegs into round holes, and God never gives anyone a command without giving them the abilities needed to complete it successfully, so I don't see any men having any excuse for not being able to lead their own households.
God's design and command was put into play with the idea of men being in the dominant/leading/decision making role, and women being in the submissive/administrative/acting role, with respect to the family structure. Whether or not that was the plan *before* the Fall in Eden, I don't know, but it's the plan now.
As near as I can tell from Scripture, the only way a man may be absolved from this office of "Christ" for the family is to abstain from *having* a family. As a batchelor he'd be responsible at best for honoring his father and mother and managing his own affairs. But if he takes up the role of Husband, then he is signing up for all of the leadership responsibility that goes with it. Perhaps there would be fewer marriages if men stopped to think about that. A man with no leadership ability outside the home is still responsible to be the Head of his family.
It's a sad commentary on our society that we no longer rear our young men to be prepared to take such a role, nor are young women prepared to accept the leadership of their husbands. Many men (and women for that matter) define "leadership" solely in terms of "I get to have the final say" with no understanding of the grave responsibility that leadership entails. Others have an understanding of that responsibility...but they want no part of it. They prefer to live their lives in such a way that their wives usually end up feeling like they are overgrown children who just happen to bring home a pay check at the end of the week.
In principle I would agree.
Everyone has gifts and weaknesses. God didn't put us all here to all be good at exactly the same things. This is why I don't think it's at all unreasonable for a husband to choose to delagate *a portion* of his authority to his wife.
But sometimes God demands more from us than an adherence to simple principles.
The mandate to be the leader of the family comes to all men not from me, but from God. I'm not trying to push any square pegs into round holes, and God never gives anyone a command without giving them the abilities needed to complete it successfully, so I don't see any men having any excuse for not being able to lead their own households.
God's design and command was put into play with the idea of men being in the dominant/leading/decision making role, and women being in the submissive/administrative/acting role, with respect to the family structure. Whether or not that was the plan *before* the Fall in Eden, I don't know, but it's the plan now.
As near as I can tell from Scripture, the only way a man may be absolved from this office of "Christ" for the family is to abstain from *having* a family. As a batchelor he'd be responsible at best for honoring his father and mother and managing his own affairs. But if he takes up the role of Husband, then he is signing up for all of the leadership responsibility that goes with it. Perhaps there would be fewer marriages if men stopped to think about that. A man with no leadership ability outside the home is still responsible to be the Head of his family.
It's a sad commentary on our society that we no longer rear our young men to be prepared to take such a role, nor are young women prepared to accept the leadership of their husbands. Many men (and women for that matter) define "leadership" solely in terms of "I get to have the final say" with no understanding of the grave responsibility that leadership entails. Others have an understanding of that responsibility...but they want no part of it. They prefer to live their lives in such a way that their wives usually end up feeling like they are overgrown children who just happen to bring home a pay check at the end of the week.
Yes Dreamer i also am very Lucky to have a husband who is a christian,
My husband works so hard and because of him and Gods Blessing we have a wonderful life, i had a chat with my husband about this matter and he feels as i am such an organised person and have strick rules about all our bills being paid in advance ,he trusts me to do this job and showed me that i was not seeing the full picture and how we work as a team, he brings home the bacon and i cook it. I now see that although it may seem i have a lot of control, i dont as everything i do i do with my husbands approval by keeping his views and opinions in my mind.
God Bless all and thank you for your views
My husband works so hard and because of him and Gods Blessing we have a wonderful life, i had a chat with my husband about this matter and he feels as i am such an organised person and have strick rules about all our bills being paid in advance ,he trusts me to do this job and showed me that i was not seeing the full picture and how we work as a team, he brings home the bacon and i cook it. I now see that although it may seem i have a lot of control, i dont as everything i do i do with my husbands approval by keeping his views and opinions in my mind.
God Bless all and thank you for your views
