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You Learn from My Mistakes. Please Help Me.

Joined
Sep 8, 2009
Messages
3
Hello fellow children,

I know this is long but please read and help me its important.

My name is Gary. I have lived for twenty seven long painfull years. My past is not one I am proud of I regret alot of stuff that I done. These are not things I tell anyone in real life but I know I will be safe from judgment here. I came across this site with help from God. He gave me the power to take control for the first time in my life. And google this forum. I believe he sent me here to help me finally find him.

I think when I was really young I knew God was there but bad experences when I was a kid blocked him out. The bad experences growed, maybe it was God punishing me for losing faith in him. Most of my bad experences came from my father was an alcoholic. He would get drunk and focus his anger on me. Sometimes he just roughed me up but other times he Id rather not say. Lets just say if roughing up was all I got it was a good day. When I was ten he went to prison for sending death threats to Michael Dukakis. I did not want him to ever get out he could rot in there. But he did when I was in highschool. He beat me way harder then the past. I started to lose focus in school. After He sayed I stole money from him he beat me so bad he broke my ribs with a kick. I couldn’t take it anymore and dropped out of school and ran away my last year.

I traveled north sleeping in the woods with cayotes. I made it from Newark to Rockford Illionois in a week. I got a job at a burger king and made friends with the other kitchen guys. They all liked drugs and got me hooked but they let me say at there place for the start when I was homeless. I got an apartment and was smoking pot and that got me into heroin. I got fired at burger king and got hired at Sonics as a smoothie maker. I met a female named Courtney and she became my first lover and nine months lader the mother of my boy Preston. I was still doing smack. We moved in together and started a family for a year. One night we got in a fight when we was drunk and she got mad and drove away. That night she ran a red light and hit a small car. She died and so did a little girl. Court was one of the most good and unselfish people I had ever known. I loved her. I kept asking myself what if one little thing changed like Court didn’t get mad or that other car wasn’t driving so late. Would my babys mama still be with me.

Me and Preston moved to Chicago. I got a job at another burger king. I stopped doing heroin and did other drugs insteed. I would snort lines and walk around Chicago. I met my girl I would later get in trouble with walking around. When I met her she was a hooker. She liked being with me but she didn’t get close to begin. For the first seven months she didn’t even tell me her real name I had to refer to her by her work name. Christi Cream.

Eventually she opened up and told me her name was Tammy. She told me she had a kid two. Her son is coinsidentally a liar. So from this point I will reefer to my son as Preston and her son as liar. I asked her to move into together. After two months of Tammy living with me we decided to get married mostly for money reasons. I thought she was normal but she ended up being bipolar.

One night after we took some good lsd she thought Preston was a lizard. For those who haven’t tried lsd, it is a hallucinogen and can make you see unreal things. She dragged Preston outside and locked him out. I was sleeping and didn’t know that she did that. I let him inside in the mourning but was real mad. I told Tammy we were have to cut down our drugs to be better parents. I got clean and thought she did two. About a month later, I picked liar up from first grade and when I came home I found Tammy with a crack pipe in our apartment WITH PRESOTN home. I was real mad and didnt control my temper. She got mad back and said she was gonna tell police I beat her. She reported me and lier also made stuff up to help his mama. I have a prior record like drug possession, possession of drug paraphernalia, criminal trespassing, sale of drugs to a minor, resisting arrest, and theft. I am facing charges for aggrevated battery wich is another felony and I could go to jail for 10 years.

The lawyer says I am gonna probably be found guilty because no one will believe me. I dont even think he believes me. I am scared of going two prison. I will be the first to admit that I have made some mistakes in life but its cause been alone. I am ready to accept Jesus Christ as my lord and savior. I heard its when we need him most we find him, and I think he will help me get throw this.

All I ask is that you pray for me cause I can be a good person and am a good father. Also learn from my mistakes cause any one can make them.

Thank you for reading it is longer then a page and God bless.

Gary
 
Hi Gary and welcome. I am sorry for your troubles and I will be praying for you and your family.
 
i'm praying for you... you keep praying. i have found peace in Jesus. my favorite bible verse. 'in this world you will have trouble. but take heart. i have overcome the world.' john 16:33.
 
I am kind of new to praying. I should be praying at night and put my hands together? How do I make it so God can hear?

Thank you guys for the acceptense and praying.

Gary
 
I am ready to accept Jesus Christ as my lord and savior. I heard its when we need him most we find him, and I think he will help me get through this.

Welcome to TalkJesus, Gary. I'm very excited that you have joined us and it could very well be an act of God that brought you here. I'm going to move your post and this thread to our Counseling Forum because that is where we can be of the most help to you. If you'll check the past threads in that forum, you'l find some that deal with substance abuse and emotional abuse.

Your words "I am ready to accept Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior" are the most important words you'll ever say. All you need to do to start your new life with Him is to get on your knees and ask Him to be your Lord and Savior.

I need to warn you that the healing you need will come, but it probably won't come quickly. I've been a member of Alcoholics Anonymous for more than twenty years and I know from experience that you'll probably have to travel a long and painful path to recovery. However, the results will be well worth the time and effort.

After you pray for Jesus to be your Lord and Savior, please send me a PM (Private message) and let me know how that went. Keep me posted on how you are doing. I'll help yoi in any way I can.

Spirit Led Ed (SLE)
 
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THE BATTLES THE LORDS AND THE VICTORY IS OURS!
Many times things appear to be a loser for us! He has Already DECLARED US MORE THAN CONQUERORS by FAITH@ But we must worship our LORD and believe HIS mighty Words! Give your self to the LORD ,then Put All your faith in HIm! get away from evil people and do not fear!
Ask the HOLY GHOST to fell your mouth with the correct Words And do not worry , No matter what your eyes tell you! I been though LOTS , But He has NEVER FAILED ME!
 
My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.
James 1:2-4
Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded. Be afflicted, and mourn, and weep: let your laughter be turned to mourning, and your joy to heaviness. Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and he shall lift you up.
James 4:7-10
If ye continue in my word, then are ye my disciples indeed; And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.
John 8:31-32
I say unto you, that likewise joy shall be in heaven over one sinner that repenteth, more than over ninety and nine just persons, which need no repentance.
Luke 15:7
Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.
Matt 11:28-30
 
dear Gary . . .

your story wasnt too long, considering your life is in those words . . .

Welcome to TalkJesus!!!

a few thoughts came up while reading your testimony, your cry for prayersupport and fellowship . . .

1. Ready for Jesus? GREAT =)

If your sincere, take a quiet time out to talk to Him like to us . . .

Tell Him what you told us . . Tell Him you see your mistakes in life, tell Him your ready to live a new life and ask Him to come into your life to start over with His help and His Holy Spirit cleansing you from ALL sins ever . . .

only God can forgive all sins . . .we cant . . .God can!!

Thank God for His offer to us through Jesus and start reading in His Word about the wonderful plan of life He had all times for us . . .

God will hear you and confirm you His presence :love:

if you dont want to be alone or do this by yourself, no problem, go to a church that teaches Jesus Christ out of the bible and about Salvation through Jesus . .im sure you find someone FOR SURE to help you pray this prayer :love:

2. Stand up straight for your actions!

if your honest enough to tell us about everything and your ready to go to court and expect penalty, except it and start paying your time off!

With God on your side, His word in your hand and lots of worship cd*s in your ear, you will survive, learn in this time who God really is and you will see miracles happen, even in jail =)

maybe you need this time to start recovering? im sure your son will be good taken care off and will be able to visit and hear from you. . .

Only God knows how long you really have to stay in, but stand up for your actions and pull it through . . God will reward you for standing up in honesty and being responsible to your son for your actions!

Plus you will have good chances of therapy or groupsessions for all the problems you have had?

3. I wish we all would learn from this . . .and wouldnt judge you for it . . unfortunetly. . .people are people . . .all the same online or offline . . .they make their own decisions and their own judgements . . . we dont have impact on that . .we can only try to change the world into a better place . . .one person at the time :love:

God bless you and thanks for your attempt to start a better life :love:
 
Hi Gary, I am a new member too, but I have know the Lord for quite a few years. I have a very painful past myself, and because of that I am able to help others who have similar painful pasts... God has great plans for you. Whatever you have gone through has equipped you to help others with similar experiences. Some may say the road ahead will be long and painful, I disagree in some ways. Allow the joy of the Lord to be your strength and keep your eyes focused on Him first, then your son, then yourself. Accept His forgiveness as a gift, and make a choice to forgive everyone in your life that has caused you to be hurt or angry. I know this is very hard... it's a choice. Ask the Lord to help you. I will pray for you. Good luck and stay in touch on this forum!
 
Check out GaryMeetsJesus on YouTube. He may not be a sincere seeker.

SLE

I sm not on youtube. I am sincere. thanks for moving this theyre is alot of help in this forum.

She has been trying to get my kid to hate me. So Im really trying to be strong here. I bought a bible. I have read a lot of it. Who wrote this? Was it jesus? The storys in it seem kinda exadgerated. If jesus wrote it its definately true thow. I believe what jesus says is true because he was better than a regular human.
 
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