Demonic/bizarre experience with husband

[of_the_rose]

I need help discerning what is going on in my household.

Long story short my husband and I have been married for almost 10 years with two young children. When we first met he was street preaching with his church and was a new believer, (I was a Christian for 10 years at that point). His church spoke well of him, he handled the word well even being new, and he was very passionate about his faith. We married quickly, and shortly after we married he started abdicating his duties towards me. He was so absent that that our pastor and deacons threatened to put him under church discipline and called him worse than an unbeliever. Soon after he stopped talking about the Lord, and I never saw him pray, or read his bible. Any conversation I would try to initiate about the Lord would be shut down or turn into a bizarre argument over semantics.

Since nearly the beginning of our marriage, he spends four hours each morning in the basement playing guitar/video games and some unknown things before going to work and In the evenings, and during the weekends he is closed off and to himself, barely interacting with the family. This has been going on for nearly a decade. Whenever I was asked about my marriage by others, I would say that we are two ships in the night, and that I barely know him. It has been years of trying to figure out why we don't really spend time with each other, or share basic levels of physical affection.

I was feeling so heartbroken this past month that I started praying for hours each day about my marriage. I started spending way more time in the word too. I also received counsel from a few trusted Christian friends. But here is what really confuses me:

A couple weeks ago my friend sent me a video about "The spirit of Ahab." I recognized those traits in my husband (e.g. passivity) but wasn't sure if there was an actual "spirit of Ahab" that could affect him. So I listened to another video about it. As I listened to that second video it spoke about how the spirit of Ahab/demonic forces can also affect others in the household. Soon after that, and I feel crazy saying this, I saw some demonic like figure standing in my living room. It reminded me of when I used to get sleep paralysis and I would see and or sense a demonic presence in the room and feel absolute terror. So I fled upstairs.

I decided to pray about it to calm myself down. I then walked into our bedroom and saw my husband sleeping. As I looked at him I felt terror again. I looked away, then looked back again, and I felt another jolt of terror. I immediately sensed that he was spiritually dead and in great danger. It was a palpable on a level that is hard to describe. This was a rare and bizarre experience for me.

The next day I told him about this experience, and he didn't respond. I then asked him if he prayed - he said that he couldn't remember the last time he prayed. I then asked him if he reads his Bible - he said that he couldn't remember the last time he read his bible. I asked him if that bothers him - he said that he's not sure that it does. I asked him if he thought that it was dangerous for him and his family if he doesn't pray or read the bible - he said, "what danger?" And finally, when asked he said that he only goes to church to make me happy. I felt like that interaction confirmed the terrifying experience the night before.

Since then I have been praying more with and for my children, being more diligent in the word, and seeking out additional counsel on how to be a good Christian wife and mother with husband regardless of where he is. But I have questions still standing - is the Spirit of Ahab a real thing? What do I do with that demonic experience I had? Has anyone had a similar experience to this?

 

[Rxlx]

Sounds very much like demonic possession to me.
Rock music and rock videos sure look Satanic and I think the constant booming noise, flashing lights and fast actions just shut down parts of the brain.
Research with babies show their brain ssit down when put in front of a tv with fast cartoons playing.

I spent a few sundays at a pentecostal church. Before the service was a full half hour of a woman prancing from side to side of the stage and moaning 'Jesus, Jesus' to a backing of heavy rock. One of musicians was sat on a box and beating out a very solid monotonous rhythm that reminded me of the film of jungle drums in old films of natives in remote African jungles getting possessed by Dambulawayo and reeling about in a trance.

Your sleep paralysis was a visit by one of Satan's Second Gangs of Fallen Angels aka an incubus. They wander around all night passing through bedroom walls just as Jesus entered the upper room.

No one but me believes in the second gang though it's described in the Bible.

I'm not sure what to do about your man except try make him get rid of the music and videos and get some sunshine and trips to church.
But be careful as if he really is possessed his demon may make him kill you.
Keep praying for help for him.

 

[joestue]

I don't have direct experience with your case but overall it is somewhat of a common story. It is just that rarely do people have clear spiritual discernment about it to accurately put the blame on "a demon named zyz" that started affecting a person by "sins a b and c"

You can read all you want about the jezebel and ahab spirits but the reality is its a lot more complicated than that. I tend to suspend judgement on the matter and i would say that while demons do exist.. demons pour gasoline on a fire that was already started. Ahab and others in the bible were just particularly classic examples. why doesn't balaam have a demon named after him? of all the people in the bible he should have one.

My wife insists God has not given her any spiritual responsibility over or to me, that's just been our experience. So i do not expect God to empower you to confront this guy and kick the demon out, but maybe he will, i don't know.

You should have power over the demon to limit its influence in your household if you do all the things God requires of you, but your husband has to turn away from the "spirit of ahab" -laziness, etc.. to get rid of it himself.

As always, you're going to get specific case by case guidance from the Spirit of God if you ask for it.

 

[of_the_rose]

I don't have direct experience with your case but overall it is somewhat of a common story. It is just that rarely do people have clear spiritual discernment about it to accurately put the blame on "a demon named zyz" that started affecting a person by "sins a b and c"

You can read all you want about the jezebel and ahab spirits but the reality is its a lot more complicated than that. I tend to suspend judgement on the matter and i would say that while demons do exist.. demons pour gasoline on a fire that was already started. Ahab and others in the bible were just particularly classic examples. why doesn't balaam have a demon named after him? of all the people in the bible he should have one.

My wife insists God has not given her any spiritual responsibility over or to me, that's just been our experience. So i do not expect God to empower you to confront this guy and kick the demon out, but maybe he will, i don't know.

You should have power over the demon to limit its influence in your household if you do all the things God requires of you, but your husband has to turn away from the "spirit of ahab" -laziness, etc.. to get rid of it himself.

As always, you're going to get specific case by case guidance from the Spirit of God if you ask for it.

Yes, I am also hesitant to say that "demon named zyz" causes "sins a b and c" although I found the thought initially compelling. All I can confidently say is that there is demonic activity here. Also around the same time I had a vivid dream of a demon attacking me because it realized that my husband was absent and I was battling temptation. I woke up screaming and in terror. My husband pinned me down because I was loud and flailing, then he quickly fell back to sleep. Shortly after I told my husband about the contents of my dream, and he decided that he was going to start sleeping in the basement. He said he wasn't sleeping well and the basement might help with that. I found that timing to be really odd.

But yes, I would agree that I could limit the demon(s) influence in my household by walking close to the Lord. As for my spiritual responsibility towards him it would go as far as me simply walking close to the Lord, which may or may not win him over.

 

[Rhema]

His church spoke well of him,

Is not "his" church also yours? (Sorry, that wasn't quite clear.)

our pastor and deacons threatened to put him under church discipline and called him worse than an unbeliever.

I would think such threats would drive someone further away from any active participation no matter the church. Of course I don't know what y'all would consider to be "church discipline," but I've run into many church leaders that merely want power and to lord it over others rather than being a servant to help their congregation.

So other than the quite likely "spirit of depression," I'd suggest impartial marriage counseling (meaning not church affiliated) making sure that any such counseling is focused on strengthening the marriage. (There are some "marriage" councilors out there whose purpose is to destroy marriages, so just be careful of that.)

Perhaps you might suggest that you and he choose a new church together - one that doesn't have any "baggage" or "history" associated with it? Together y'all might find a church that better suits your spiritual growth - a church that edifies and lifts up instead of scolding and dragging people down. (Not saying it does, I just don't have all the details - of course.)

God bless,
Rhema

(To some extent I can empathize, in that two years into my daughter's marriage, her husband went insane. Not a good experience to deal with.)

 

[Rockerduck]

You are still sleeping together and still talking to each other, and he cares about you because he goes to church with you, just for you. Your husband goes to work every day and holds a job. You haven't talked about divorce and apparently neither has your husband. Hmmm. Have I got this right? Sounds like a marriage to me. Maybe it's you, have you considered that?

 

[of_the_rose]

Is not "his" church also yours? (Sorry, that wasn't quite clear.)


I would think such threats would drive someone further away from any active participation no matter the church. Of course I don't know what y'all would consider to be "church discipline," but I've run into many church leaders that merely want power and to lord it over others rather than being a servant to help their congregation.

So other than the quite likely "spirit of depression," I'd suggest impartial marriage counseling (meaning not church affiliated) making sure that any such counseling is focused on strengthening the marriage. (There are some "marriage" councilors out there whose purpose is to destroy marriages, so just be careful of that.)

Perhaps you might suggest that you and he choose a new church together - one that doesn't have any "baggage" or "history" associated with it? Together y'all might find a church that better suits your spiritual growth - a church that edifies and lifts up instead of scolding and dragging people down. (Not saying it does, I just don't have all the details - of course.)

God bless,
Rhema

(To some extent I can empathize, in that two years into my daughter's marriage, her husband went insane. Not a good experience to deal with.)

Sorry for the confusion. We used to go to different churches, we went to his for a few years (the one where he was threatened with church discipline), then we went back to mine, and now to one closer to home. The last two churches have been healthy and gentle with us.

At the last two, the elders and others have tried to come alongside him in a very kind way, and felt as though he was a closed book, and hard to get to know. We have discussed marriage counselling but he is not comfortable with that option.

I guess the main area of confusion has more to do with why God would allow me to have such an experience. Perhaps he was trying to convey a sense of urgency, or to help me discern whether or not he is just very backslidden or unsaved? This would affect in some way how I would pray for him or conduct myself.

 

[of_the_rose]

You are still sleeping together and still talking to each other, and he cares about you because he goes to church with you, just for you. Your husband goes to work every day and holds a job. You haven't talked about divorce and apparently neither has your husband. Hmmm. Have I got this right? Sounds like a marriage to me. Maybe it's you, have you considered that?

If we were an everyday secular couple, then yes, him holding a job, not talking about divorce, and him doing things to make me happy would simply "sound like a marriage." Our problems would still be difficult, and we would likely approach things differently. As a Christian wife seeing a decade long absence of prayer, time in the word, or mention of the Lord concerns me, as it should. With the recent terrifying experience, concern is normal.

 

[joestue]

I guess the main area of confusion has more to do with why God would allow me to have such an experience. Perhaps he was trying to convey a sense of urgency, or to help me discern whether or not he is just very backslidden or unsaved? This would affect in some way how I would pray for him or conduct myself.

I agree with your concerns.

 

[backNforth]

Your OP screams out for a resolution. Thanks for posting it, as undoubtedly there are many who have experienced similar phenomena.

I am involved with a ministry of deliverance and have dealt with folks in similar situations.

is the Spirit of Ahab a real thing? What do I do with that demonic experience I had? Has anyone had a similar experience to this?

Yes, it is real. Knowing who you are in Christ, and then appropriating that Authority in prayer, is how you, as the wife, most effectively deal with this. Remember that deciding to act is not an emotion - it is a choice.

Do not be afraid. You have a choice in how you decide to react when confronted with an ugly devil. Fear is not some metaphor or allegory. Fear is a demonic spirit - one that the Lord has not given to his people:

For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. (2 Tim. 1:7).

Here is a key passage that applies directly to your situation as the wife:

Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear [note: a different "fear" than demonic spirit]. (1 Peter 3:1-2).

According to that verse, your behavior, specifically your spiritual behavior, can affect your husband's situation - for the better!

It is apparent from your description that your husband is backslidden or similar. Your behavior can bring the Holy Spirit to bear in this situation. This is not taught in corporate mainstream evangelical churches or their subsidiaries.

Sounds very much like demonic possession to me...But be careful as if he really is possessed his demon may make him kill you.

It's not possession, but is certainly oppression.

Your sleep paralysis was a visit by one of Satan's Second Gangs of Fallen Angels aka an incubus. They wander around all night passing through bedroom walls just as Jesus entered the upper room.

Incubus is the "male" version and sucubus is the "female" version of said devil.

All I can confidently say is that there is demonic activity here. Also around the same time I had a vivid dream of a demon attacking me because it realized that my husband was absent and I was battling temptation. I woke up screaming and in terror. My husband pinned me down because I was loud and flailing, then he quickly fell back to sleep. Shortly after I told my husband about the contents of my dream, and he decided that he was going to start sleeping in the basement. He said he wasn't sleeping well and the basement might help with that. I found that timing to be really odd.

Your husband has been ordained by God as the spiritual head. If he is in abdication of that position, then the devils will test, test, and test.

So both of you are not sleeping well. It's time for you to rise in the spiritual authority that you have been vested with.

We have discussed marriage counselling but he is not comfortable with that option.

Going to some other man, however well intentioned, can open doors that should not be opened. (So does following my or any other's advice in this thread!) In all cases, make your requests known to God:

Be careful [anxious] for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. (Phi. 4:6).

I guess the main area of confusion has more to do with why God would allow me to have such an experience. Perhaps he was trying to convey a sense of urgency, or to help me discern whether or not he is just very backslidden or unsaved? This would affect in some way how I would pray for him or conduct myself.

Absolutely, yes to all of that. So, is it safe to say God has your attention now? He came to set the captives free, and he wants you walking in his liberty. So we always go to his word to learn of the particulars we need to be about.

As a Christian wife seeing a decade long absence of prayer, time in the word, or mention of the Lord concerns me, as it should. With the recent terrifying experience, concern is normal.

Assume your authority in Christ and pray accordingly. Do not be afraid, as fear is a characteristic of unbelief. The only thing that the devils fear is the blood of Jesus i.e. the bloodwork of the cross that he accomplished in order to SET YOU FREE.

Your present situation did not evolve overnight, and it may not resolve overnight, either. Or, it very well may resolve overnight. God will get the honor, but you must do your part and make the stand for the Most High God. I posted here in another thread, concerning psychotropic drug use and demonic involvement. Some steps to deliverance are listed there, for your general benefit and specifically for your husband's, as the head of the home.

In any case, you can literally pray over your husband, as well. He doesn't even need to know that you are standing over his bed praying as he sleeps! When the devils come, rebuke them in the name of Jesus, who is your Authority. Remember that you are just a vessel to be used of the Holy Spirit, but the devils will flee at the name of Jesus. You can bind them to inactivity or, better still, send them elsewhere; it's up to you, in Christ. BTW, when Jesus cast out devils, the words he said were "Get out." The point is that this is not a formula or a ritual. This is you, a blood-bought and paid-for child of the Most High, appropriating the Holy Spirit in a time of need. USE THE POWER, sister.

 

[Admon Mikha'el]

You are still sleeping together and still talking to each other, and he cares about you because he goes to church with you, just for you. Your husband goes to work every day and holds a job. You haven't talked about divorce and apparently neither has your husband. Hmmm. Have I got this right? Sounds like a marriage to me. Maybe it's you, have you considered that?

What? Are you all right Rockerduck? It's abundantly obvious the MAN has a problem. The fact they are legally married does not mean they still have a marriage...Its obvious from what she says, that she is still trying and he is not. He has broken covenant with her and the marriage is dead. No fault of hers

 

[Rockerduck]

What? Are you all right Rockerduck? It's abundantly obvious the MAN has a problem. The fact they are legally married does not mean they still have a marriage...Its obvious from what she says, that she is still trying and he is not. He has broken covenant with her and the marriage is dead. No fault of hers

I quoted what she said. I summarized what she said. I read between the lines. They sleep together, and there is communication between them, and he cares about her. He goes to church with her. These are her words.

 

[Rockerduck]

If we were an everyday secular couple, then yes, him holding a job, not talking about divorce, and him doing things to make me happy would simply "sound like a marriage." Our problems would still be difficult, and we would likely approach things differently. As a Christian wife seeing a decade long absence of prayer, time in the word, or mention of the Lord concerns me, as it should. With the recent terrifying experience, concern is normal.

Look up "ADD 101" and see if this describes your husband. Attention deficit disorder people are smart and hard to understand.

 

[of_the_rose]

Your OP screams out for a resolution. Thanks for posting it, as undoubtedly there are many who have experienced similar phenomena.

I am involved with a ministry of deliverance and have dealt with folks in similar situations.


Yes, it is real. Knowing who you are in Christ, and then appropriating that Authority in prayer, is how you, as the wife, most effectively deal with this. Remember that deciding to act is not an emotion - it is a choice.

Do not be afraid. You have a choice in how you decide to react when confronted with an ugly devil. Fear is not some metaphor or allegory. Fear is a demonic spirit - one that the Lord has not given to his people:

For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. (2 Tim. 1:7).

Here is a key passage that applies directly to your situation as the wife:

Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear [note: a different "fear" than demonic spirit]. (1 Peter 3:1-2).

According to that verse, your behavior, specifically your spiritual behavior, can affect your husband's situation - for the better!

It is apparent from your description that your husband is backslidden or similar. Your behavior can bring the Holy Spirit to bear in this situation. This is not taught in corporate mainstream evangelical churches or their subsidiaries.


It's not possession, but is certainly oppression.


Incubus is the "male" version and sucubus is the "female" version of said devil.


Your husband has been ordained by God as the spiritual head. If he is in abdication of that position, then the devils will test, test, and test.

So both of you are not sleeping well. It's time for you to rise in the spiritual authority that you have been vested with.


Going to some other man, however well intentioned, can open doors that should not be opened. (So does following my or any other's advice in this thread!) In all cases, make your requests known to God:

Be careful [anxious] for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. (Phi. 4:6).


Absolutely, yes to all of that. So, is it safe to say God has your attention now? He came to set the captives free, and he wants you walking in his liberty. So we always go to his word to learn of the particulars we need to be about.


Assume your authority in Christ and pray accordingly. Do not be afraid, as fear is a characteristic of unbelief. The only thing that the devils fear is the blood of Jesus i.e. the bloodwork of the cross that he accomplished in order to SET YOU FREE.

Your present situation did not evolve overnight, and it may not resolve overnight, either. Or, it very well may resolve overnight. God will get the honor, but you must do your part and make the stand for the Most High God. I posted here in another thread, concerning psychotropic drug use and demonic involvement. Some steps to deliverance are listed there, for your general benefit and specifically for your husband's, as the head of the home.

In any case, you can literally pray over your husband, as well. He doesn't even need to know that you are standing over his bed praying as he sleeps! When the devils come, rebuke them in the name of Jesus, who is your Authority. Remember that you are just a vessel to be used of the Holy Spirit, but the devils will flee at the name of Jesus. You can bind them to inactivity or, better still, send them elsewhere; it's up to you, in Christ. BTW, when Jesus cast out devils, the words he said were "Get out." The point is that this is not a formula or a ritual. This is you, a blood-bought and paid-for child of the Most High, appropriating the Holy Spirit in a time of need. USE THE POWER, sister.

Thanks for the thoughtful response. I cannot address all of what you said, but once again thank you.
1 Peter 3:1-2 is indeed a very powerful verse for our situation. I will take hold of it. And yes I will use the power!