Dreadlocks, AuPair and the USA

[trucker]

dread locks

The bottom line on dread locks is this. One, of course they are not ungodly nor does the word of God even address dreadlocks. The problem is a social problem. Each culture has its own challenges.

If you come to American and are hired by someone, you must conform to their standards of employment. It has nothing to do with prejudice, or godliness. If I hired you, at the interview I would give you the standards I would expect you to live up to. If you could not abide by the standards I gave you, then you would have to seek employment with someone else. Its not that I would oppose dreadlocks, but I would consider your appearance socially, the affect your appearance would have on my clients, and especially how my children would be affected. All jobs are this way. For example, if I hired you as a lawyer at a high powered law firm, I would want you clean cut, no wild hair styles, make up conservative ect, ect. You may say that’s unfair, but the bottom line is your appearance does make a difference in the business world. If I was a construction foreman and you showed up dressed in a sharp dress and blouse and the job you sought required you to dig a ditch, I would not hire you due to the fact you were dressed inappropriately.

I am a child of the sixties and I saw the hippie movement put demands on people that were totally stupid. If someone walked into my office, had hair down to their backside (Male), no shirt, sandals and had not bathed, you bet you would not be hired. Is that prejudice? You bet, I am prejudice against hiring slobs.

The sad part is, many talented people lose jobs or are not hired because they refuse to conform. The bottom line there is: Rebellion. I know, I lived it for about four years. I got hungry and decided ,hmmm long hair and being cool or food on the table. My belly won out! LOL

My own personal opinion on dread locks is this. If they are WASHED, neat and clean and worn in an atmosphere that is appropriate for that hair style, then keep them. If not, then you may have to change hairstyles. Why ruin a career you worked hard to get over hair style?

 

[Chad]

I agree with tucker. Excellent examples and point made! Hair is just hair (sorry ladies). There are more important matters for sure than hair, as tucker said your career is more important.

 

[AnNi]

@trucker: thanks for your answer
I understand your point of view very well, but I love my hair and if I's say: "okay, I cut it off, so I can do this and this" it's like knuckling down in front of a cursorily community, saying: "oh yes - you won"
and this is something I don't want to do...

Ruining a career as a business-woman or a banker, but having the feeling to be free and not the slave of a society like the one we have...

Maybe you understand what I mean..

@Chad: Why do you think that a career is more important? What does Jesus say? Is there a scripture that says "accommodate to the society!" ?

May God bless you!
AnNi

PS: @soul_drummer: thank you for your last answer - I first read it today - I'm sorry! and yes - it wold be interesting to hear which 3th person of the bible you mean to could have dreadloks

 

[Chad]

Career is more important because that's common sense. If you refuse to accomodate to the job your applying to, that's your problem and you won't get hired. If your dreadlocks are more important to you than earning a living, good for you. I know my priorities are different than that. Hair does not come first over career for me.

 

[Word of Life]

God looks at the heart and this is where today's society has got it wrong. Remember, when Jesus chose his disciples, he didn't chose top lawyers in fancy suits and ties or fashion designer ladies in pretty frocks. He chose genuine people with a good heart. Fishers of men.

This is what I pulled of the internet.

Question: What the Bible Says About... Appearance

Fashion and appearance reign supreme today. Advertising bombards us with ways to improve our appearance on a daily basis. Shows like “What Not to Wear” and “The Biggest Loser” show people changing the way they look for big ratings. People are being told they are not good looking enough, so why not try botox, plastic surgery like their role models?

Answer:

The Bible tells us that we need to take a different approach to appearance than fitting into society’s idea of beauty.

What God Finds Important:

God doesn’t focus on our outward appearance. It is what’s on the inside that matters most to Him. The Bible tells us that God’s focus is on developing our inner beauty so that it can be reflected in everything we do and what we are.

1 Samuel 16:7 – “The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” (NIV)

James 1:23 – “Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror.” (NIV)

But, Trustworthy People Look Good
Do they always? Outward appearance is not the best way to judge how “good” a person is.

One example is Ted Bundy. He was a very handsome man who, in the 1970’s, murdered woman after woman before he was caught. He was an effective serial killer, because he was very charming and good-looking. People like Ted Bundy serve to remind us that what is on the outside does not always match the inside.

More importantly, look at Jesus. Here is God’s Son come to Earth in as a man. Do people recognize His outward appearance as anything but a man? No. Instead he was hung on a cross and died. His own people did not look beyond the outer appearance to see His inner beauty and holiness.

Matthew 23:28 – “In the same way, on the outside you appear to people as righteous, but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness.” (NIV)

Matthew 7:20 – “Thus, by their fruit you will recognize them.” (NIV)

So, Is it Important to Look Good?

Unfortunately we do live in a superficial world where people do judge on appearance. We would all love to say that we are not in the majority, and that we all look beyond what’s on the outside, but virtually all of us are influenced by appearances.

Yet, we need to keep appearance in perspective. The Bible tells us that it is important to present ourselves as nicely as possible, but God does not call us to go to extremes. It is important that we remain aware of why we do the things we do to look good. Ask yourself two questions:

Does your focus on your appearance take your eyes off the Lord?
Are you more focused on your weight, clothes, or makeup than you are on God?

If you answered, “Yes,” to either of the questions then you may need to take a closer look at your priorities. The Bible tells us to look closer at our hearts and actions rather than our presentation and appearance.

Colossians 3:17 – “And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” (NIV)

Proverbs 31:30 – “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting: but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” (NIV)

 

[Dreamer]

Word of Life, that was a wonderful response to this thread. The verses really caused me to stop and meditate upon God. What does He really want for us? To love Him, serve Him, walk with Him. Dwelling upon physical appearance in an obcessional way.....takes time away from our time spent with our Lord God.

 

[trucker]

dread locks

All these post are excellent and all have great points. I just want to point out to you all that the world, the business world especially if not run by a Christian leader does not care one bit about scripture, what God has to say nor do they care.

Again, if you chose to wear clothes, hair or styles that do not fit in with the career you choose, those hiring you have the right to reject you. Fair or not, that is the way the world system operates. Just understand that when you choose the styles you wear.

Matt 5: 16 tells us to let our light shine before men so that they may see our good works and those works bring Glory to God.

All we do, think, say and wear should always point to our relationship with Christ. Now, God has made us all different and what type of dress I wear in the part of the country I live will be different if I travel somewhere else. Case in point. I am from Oklahoma. Most of us here wear a very casual dress and depending what career I chose it is dominantly jeans, and boots. If I travel to New York City and dress with a Jean Shirt, jeans and cowboy boots I will stick out like a sore thumb. How do I know this??? My mom lives in New York and when I go places people always comment and say, Hey cowboy what ya doin here? The entire world operates like this. I can tell you when I was stationed at Comiso Air Base in Sicily in the 1980's many of us wore western wear and we were asked by our commanders not to because believe it or not it drew undue attention to us within the community. I did not think it was fair, but hey, there culture was different, my Captain issued and order and I conformed.

As pointed out, we should do everything unto the Lord and that God looks at the heart. Again, the world looks at the outside and does not even consider your heart motivations.

I think it is just fine to wear the appropriate recent styles of hair, clothes if you enjoy them and they are decent and do not reflect an immoral lifestyle. Many people get hung up on the customs of the day, but if they are not illegal, immoral, cause you to violate your conscience nor violate the Word of God, go for it. But be prepared to be rejected by some group of the world and church. All of us have the right to wear our hair any way we want. But I do have the right to say, that’s fine for you, but you are not going to dress that way or wear your hair that way working for me.

All of this pertains to balance and not going in one ditch or the other. Again, the bible tells us not to be conformed to the world, but be transformed by the renewing of our minds. (rom 12: 1-2) We all should be working toward renewal in every area of our lives pertaining to Godly things. But when we go out into the world, we need to be wise as serpents and harmless as doves. You can not ram your styles down others throats and demand they accept you. It just does not work.

Again, I find that many people who have radical clothes, hair and lifestyles also have a problem with authority and conforming. Conforming is not wrong, and I agree, we all should be who God created to be, but there are times when you have to exam your own heart and ask, why am I doing this and is it benefiting the Kingdom of God.

As I said before, I was part of the hippie generation and we all took great pride in not conforming and being so proud of our individuality. But then I began to notice something. We ALL looked the same and we were not individuals, but had labeled our self hippies and we all looked the same. The bottom line was most of us were in rebellion to society and it was not about style but rebellion. Our nation has reaped horrible things from this error. Many of these people are our leaders and they have taken the same rebellious attitude of NON CONFORMITY and spread it like a cancer through out the nation.

God bless you all,

Trucker

 

[SpiritLedEd]

Re: Dreadlocks, AuPair, and the USA

You ask, "Is there a scripture that says 'accomodate to a society'?" I give you Romans 13:1-2: "Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted."

This doesn't just apply to civil governments. It also applies to employer-employee relationships.

SLE

 

[trucker]

dread locks

I just want to point out that yes the bible tells us to submit to authority, in Romans chapter 13, but we also must be very careful not to follow that blindly. If any authority figure asks us to do ANYTHING that violates Gods word we are not to follow it.

Let me use WWII as an example. All authority positions are from God, but not all men in authority are from God. Hitler held a position of authority, but he was not ordained by God. Men appointed him. Ungodly Men who looked to man for answers only God could give them put them in power. Others just took it. The same goes for Stalin, Lenin, Trotsky, Saddam Hussein, Idi Amin and anyone whose leader ship brought terror into a nation. Look at the fruit of those in authority and then follow it.

Look at Paul, Peter, Joseph, Daniel, Shadrack, Meshach and Abed-Nego they all were under governments that forbid them to speak on christianity. They followed Gods direction even under the threat of their lives. Due to their faith, God moved on their behalf. All of Hebrews chapter 11 tells of people who chose to live for God over ungodly rulers telling them not to speak about this God.

See Acts 4: 17-31, and Proverbs 28:12, 28, prov 29: 2, 27 Prov 14: 34

Again, this whole issue on hair is based on social acceptance, motivation of heart and understanding that if you choose to wear a style that others do not like, then you are limiting yourself to a narrow field of acceptance. Right or wrong, this is a fact on earth.

My wife comes from St. Thomas Virgin Island, many of the Island people wear dread locks and that is accepted in the Island culture. Again, take its outside the culture and people have problems with it. Again, dread locks are not sin, the wearer of the dread locks are not to be treated like they have a disease or to be loathed, but they must realize that some aspects of society will not accept them. If they are a Christian, God loves them unconditionally, but people are not like God. Unfortunately even some Christians have to work on this area of their lives.

Blessings!

Trucker

I have to chuckle, this thread about dred locks has spider webbed out into a very interesting conversation. Did you ever think your post would cover such a wide variety of topics AnNi??

 

[SpiritLedEd]

I've got another strand to add to the spiderweb: What if Jesus had chosen to dress in a manner that ran counter to culture of Israel during his time on earth? I believe His influence among the common folks of Israel would have been nil and the church may never have gotten established successfully.

SLE

 

[trucker]

dread locks

Spirit led Ed,

I think the number one thing that led people to Jesus was his anointing. Even if he wore shorts and a tee shirt, they would have overlooked it The thing that is left out in scripture with the exception of the roman soldiers casting lots for his clothes was Jesus dress. In fact if you read in Isaiah 53: 2, it specifically states that Jesus was a plain man so that there was nothing in his dress or apperance that drew men to him. It was the anointing. In other words he was not in the super model looks department. He was just plain ordinary man.

Trucker

 

[On the Path]

I want to change my position on your dreadlocks.

First: There is no need for me to be so opinionated. Hair is hair. You are taking the time to look in the mirror and put your best foot forward. And so, I want to apologize for being so narrow-minded and opinionated. There are some very well-dressed, well-groomed people who are nasty people and then there are some other people who don't fit into my mold who are very nice.

Second: You pointed out that Samson had dreadlocks. Well, if you go back and read that passage about him, you will see that he was an out of control, ungodly man.

 

[soul_drummer]

lol...well..yeah..samson was out of control, but he wasn't so out of control that God couldn't use him to bring Him glory^^. i think that's a pretty constant theme throughout the Bible. It's always about God working through the weak, powerless, the seemingly "nasty" people^^. i think that's the most beautiful thing about God and His grace^^.

i think another example, if Samson wasn't enough, would be John the Baptist. For a few reasons the Bible points out it is easy to understand that he also had dreadlocks, many scholars/theologians say so also. he doesn't seem to have been such a bad guy^^..lol.

and i guess the only thing i wonder is what kind of "mold" you are speaking of. it seems to be a VERY popular opinion of the "World" to be against such things as dreadlocks..lol..i get that a lot^^. just wondering where this mold might come from^^.

 

[On the Path]

lol...well..yeah..samson was out of control, but he wasn't so out of control that God couldn't use him to bring Him glory^^. i think that's a pretty constant theme throughout the Bible. It's always about God working through the weak, powerless, the seemingly "nasty" people^^. i think that's the most beautiful thing about God and His grace^^.

i think another example, if Samson wasn't enough, would be John the Baptist. For a few reasons the Bible points out it is easy to understand that he also had dreadlocks, many scholars/theologians say so also. he doesn't seem to have been such a bad guy^^..lol.

and i guess the only thing i wonder is what kind of "mold" you are speaking of. it seems to be a VERY popular opinion of the "World" to be against such things as dreadlocks..lol..i get that a lot^^. just wondering where this mold might come from^^.

Soul Drummer, you just took a nice apology and tore it to pieces. I wasn't talking as much about Samson as I was saying I was sorry for being so opinionated.

My so-called "mold" was my opinionated version of what people should be.

I was apologizing, not really trying to discuss Samson.

 

[Cogito]

I would certainly not worry about it. The people with truly open hearts will not judge you for your hair, and so it may help you filter out those who would be less pleasant to work for. Hope you have a great experience with your time in the US

 

[Freedomwhatelse]

How interesting this topic has been to read through. First I'd like to say that I am only one Christian soldier. I have seen written through here many different things, and in order to respond to each that I have picked up on would take forever, Jesus seemed to definately have a miraculous way of summing things up into short little statements, and this is an area where I am very weak still...LOL. The one thing that I would just like to say is to answer Ani's initial question, first I don't live in the USA, I live in neighbouring Canada but culturally speaking, before this thread I would have said that I don't think we're alot different, however I've definately had some hmmmmm's reading all of this LOL, but quite likely that's just me, lol, Ani I'm definately Christian, have defiately gone through the whole conformity issue in life, see both sides of it and shall I say that both can be narrowminded and both can be considered rebellious, it is humanism that makes the Spirit led life difficult, but none the less, from what I've read from you quite likely I would hire you dreads wouldn't matter to me, either way, it's what's inside and your foundation that matter here to me.
Here in Canada I know that some may not accually get hired for the way they look but that certainly couldn't be said because that really is judging by apperances and that is just plain wrong. And if I worked someplace and did something to alter my apperance they would be (have been) hard pressed to fire me for it, that would be definately a human rights issue that would loose, should it be taken to court. Which just let me say isn't something as a Christian I interpret that we should do not to the extent that you see or hear of in "the North American Society" today.
So in short I wouldn't not hire you because of how you look or how your hair is, and I think for me that would be in pretty much anything that I could consider myself doing that would have me hireing someone.
Just my 2 cents, very interesting thread this has become...
May God Bless You and direct your life for you,
God Bless, Love, Peace, and Joy,