is it OK to beat my son for playing evil video games?

[AnnaMom]

My son likes to play games that come from Orientals and have women with large breasts and demonic animal features. They are turning him into a child-molesting animal worshipper. We have been very clear with him that he is not to play these games, but I have caught him doing it numerous times. I have beaten him every time I discovered him playing them thus far, but my husband has told me that my son is bruising badly and that it may be detrimental to us, or even to him. What should I do? What does the Lord say about disciplining children in these matters? I see no other way to teach him that these video games are evil.

 

[Andyindauk]

Hi Anna, it's hard being a mum I appreciate. From your post you seem to doing the wrong thing for the right motives and so I would say in the strongest possible terms, please, please, please change your methods. They are totally counter-productive and likely to end up with the authorities intervening on behalf of your son, worried about his well being and safety. Worse than that, you're likely to put him off and turn him away from God's grace and calling.

The Bible talks about us being not under the law in several of Paul's letters. If we're not under the law, then your son has broken no law so please, please don't beat him until he's bruised. That's not been an effective treatment so far and there's no reason why that will change.

Am I saying it's OK for your son to be playing these games? Read Romans 6:1. Can I ask you to show the same love and compassion to your son as Jesus shows you. When you sin, He doesn't beat you until you bruise but if you're anything like me, you'll still feel that horrid, empty regret and wish that you hadn't, knowing that you have hurt and upset the God you love. You feel vulnerable and alone and so you show that by repenting and saying sorry and asking God's Spirit to help you avoid a repetition. That's called conviction by the Holy Spirit rather than obedience to the law.

I don't know where your son is in terms of his decision for Christ. If that's yet to happen then avoiding stressing God through sin is not going to be high on his priority list. If he has made a commitment then just remind him that God's not happy and then leave it between him and God.

Whether he has made a commitment or not, he's still your son and you're his mum. So please deal with him in the same way that you would want God, your father, to deal with you. In essence, remember that love conquers all. Can I please urge you give your son a huge tight hug, a grovelling apology for the beatings you've meted out and tell him that you really love him? Explain to him that you worry about him and how his behaviour will effect his relationship with God.

Going forward, if he likes gaming, try and take an interest. I know it's hard for us fuddy-duddies but look at it as an investment. Get him to show you all the different games there are out there. Spend time with him by getting him to instruct and show you how to play them. By example try and persuade him that you prefer the games of skill, races, sports, music etc. rather than violence, law breaking and war games. Explain to him both in terms of Christianity and a wider moral sense that the games you disapprove of are of really bad taste, demeaning to women and so will affect his approach to and relationships with them as he grows up. If you two can draw closer to each other and use this as a shared interest you'll find that your relationship will improve, he'll be able to talk to you about anything, and he'll steer clear of anything that might upset the mum he loves and respects.

Going further forward still, pray with him, share with him your faith as an account of your experience with God as opposed to a sermon, and how God gets you through. But before you do any of that please read 1 Corinthians 13 a couple of times over.

Do let us know how you get on. I'll be praying for you.

==================================================

Dear Lord God, I want to pray for a very special sister of mine called Anna. She's at a critical stage in her relationship with her son and so she needs bucketfuls of your Holy Spirit to guide her and give her wisdom to lead and guide him in your ways and so one day, if he hasn't already, for him to make a declaration of total allegiance to you. I pray Lord that she will win him over to you by showing him that love overcomes all and together they can explore the vast depths of the experience of your love, kindness and joy and the comfort of knowing that you're in charge and control of every little aspect of our lives, so we can relax and concentrate upon the worship and adoration of you, dear God.

We love you Lord God so much.

Amen.

 

[Brother-Paul]

Greetings Anna

Life is hard at time isn't it. The truth is Jesus never said it would be easy, but he did say he will always be there for us. Come unto me all ye who are weiry and heaven laden, take my yoke upon you and learn from me he says. And that is exactly what he wants us to do, share with him 'first', come to him in pray and tell him you do not know what to do for the best, tell him you worry so much for your son, give it all to him in prayer and ask him to Bless you, Guide you and Protect you and your son, all your household.

Prayer first always sister.

Now regarding your plea for help, my heart was troubled as I read your post, if you keep beating your son and he is showing bruises, I hear alarms bells ringing in both ears, and I am very deaf. The first worry is if the authorities get to hear about such things they will pounce and could take your son from you, I know you would find that so hard, your heart will be broken, you will blame yourself. Secondly I agree totally with brother Andy above, you have beaten your son, over and over again because you are at your wits end and don't know what else you can do, the fact it hasn't worked should speak volumes. So for yourself and your son, please stop, and seek alternative methods. Again I agree with brother Andy above, love him, show interest in what he plays, you may find it hard, probably so, but show interest, look for signs of what he finds best, is it the women, is it the killing, what attracts him to the games, knowing this will help you deal with the situation. But discuss it lovingly together.

If you do everything you can to stop him playing games, as much as you hate them, he likes them, if you continue beating him that could lead to a terrible situation for the two of you with the authorities, but there is another sting in the tail, you will drive a wedge between the two of you, we know you do not want that either Anna.

Andy has given you some good solid advice.

Pray first, have faith, give thanks, and love him every way you can. Faith, Hope and Love Anna, and the greatest of these is love.

Peace be with you.

Bless you

 

[PloughBoy]

My son likes to play games that come from Orientals and have women with large breasts and demonic animal features. They are turning him into a child-molesting animal worshipper. We have been very clear with him that he is not to play these games, but I have caught him doing it numerous times. I have beaten him every time I discovered him playing them thus far, but my husband has told me that my son is bruising badly and that it may be detrimental to us, or even to him. What should I do? What does the Lord say about disciplining children in these matters? I see no other way to teach him that these video games are evil.

You left out your sons age, which is the most important factor here.

 

[Trevor]

My son likes to play games that come from Orientals and have women with large breasts and demonic animal features. They are turning him into a child-molesting animal worshipper. We have been very clear with him that he is not to play these games, but I have caught him doing it numerous times. I have beaten him every time I discovered him playing them thus far, but my husband has told me that my son is bruising badly and that it may be detrimental to us, or even to him. What should I do? What does the Lord say about disciplining children in these matters? I see no other way to teach him that these video games are evil.

Hi Anna, lovely name, I came up against a similar problem regarding my children, but in those days it was role playing, rather than video games. The games they played weren't conducive to our faith and it worried me. Although the guy who took the role of game master had no interest in faith, my children had been brought up hearing the gospel. I pointed out that rather than playing role playing games, where the subject was pretence, they were in fact, already involved in spiritual warfare and the enemy was, through their games, working on them. That approach got them thinking and the games eventually petered out. I don't know if that approach will be of help to you, it is worth some prayer in that direction. It is important what Plough boy said regarding the age of your child, but if your son can understand the rules of the games, I'm praying that he might respond to an explanation of the book of Romans and Ephesians. It might be advantageous to you, to read up on spiritual warfare so your son can see that his mum is a warrior in a real spiritual war. Hope this is of help, bless you.

 

[Nicola Jane]

Hi Anna, it's hard being a mum I appreciate. From your post you seem to doing the wrong thing for the right motives and so I would say in the strongest possible terms, please, please, please change your methods. They are totally counter-productive and likely to end up with the authorities intervening on behalf of your son, worried about his well being and safety. Worse than that, you're likely to put him off and turn him away from God's grace and calling.

The Bible talks about us being not under the law in several of Paul's letters. If we're not under the law, then your son has broken no law so please, please don't beat him until he's bruised. That's not been an effective treatment so far and there's no reason why that will change.

Am I saying it's OK for your son to be playing these games? Read Romans 6:1. Can I ask you to show the same love and compassion to your son as Jesus shows you. When you sin, He doesn't beat you until you bruise but if you're anything like me, you'll still feel that horrid, empty regret and wish that you hadn't, knowing that you have hurt and upset the God you love. You feel vulnerable and alone and so you show that by repenting and saying sorry and asking God's Spirit to help you avoid a repetition. That's called conviction by the Holy Spirit rather than obedience to the law.

I don't know where your son is in terms of his decision for Christ. If that's yet to happen then avoiding stressing God through sin is not going to be high on his priority list. If he has made a commitment then just remind him that God's not happy and then leave it between him and God.

Whether he has made a commitment or not, he's still your son and you're his mum. So please deal with him in the same way that you would want God, your father, to deal with you. In essence, remember that love conquers all. Can I please urge you give your son a huge tight hug, a grovelling apology for the beatings you've meted out and tell him that you really love him? Explain to him that you worry about him and how his behaviour will effect his relationship with God.

Going forward, if he likes gaming, try and take an interest. I know it's hard for us fuddy-duddies but look at it as an investment. Get him to show you all the different games there are out there. Spend time with him by getting him to instruct and show you how to play them. By example try and persuade him that you prefer the games of skill, races, sports, music etc. rather than violence, law breaking and war games. Explain to him both in terms of Christianity and a wider moral sense that the games you disapprove of are of really bad taste, demeaning to women and so will affect his approach to and relationships with them as he grows up. If you two can draw closer to each other and use this as a shared interest you'll find that your relationship will improve, he'll be able to talk to you about anything, and he'll steer clear of anything that might upset the mum he loves and respects.

Going further forward still, pray with him, share with him your faith as an account of your experience with God as opposed to a sermon, and how God gets you through. But before you do any of that please read 1 Corinthians 13 a couple of times over.

Do let us know how you get on. I'll be praying for you.

==================================================

Dear Lord God, I want to pray for a very special sister of mine called Anna. She's at a critical stage in her relationship with her son and so she needs bucketfuls of your Holy Spirit to guide her and give her wisdom to lead and guide him in your ways and so one day, if he hasn't already, for him to make a declaration of total allegiance to you. I pray Lord that she will win him over to you by showing him that love overcomes all and together they can explore the vast depths of the experience of your love, kindness and joy and the comfort of knowing that you're in charge and control of every little aspect of our lives, so we can relax and concentrate upon the worship and adoration of you, dear God.

We love you Lord God so much.

Amen.

Amen

 

[Nicola Jane]

Amen

Hello Annamom
i feel for you as a mom. so from one mom to another i say this from my own experience with children and grandchildren.you cannot beat the devil, the world or sin out of your child .I know your motive is to stop him being involved in this wicked game but you must show him Jesus Love in you and through you ! Love mercy and Grace . focus on God yourself confess and plead and ask for wisdom and be still dont meddle give it all to God in prayer.just Love and and pray for new ways to spend time as a family .go out have good old fashioned fun out in Gods creation if possible get maybe your son a pet even a goldfish is a wonder to a child something to care for and Love or maybe if possible a puppy or kitten which needs care time and attention with Love. Giving your son a new responsiblity that will definatly help bring a positive change .
Prayer and faith is key here only God can change and save your son and you.
Walk this journey together in Love and you will be amazed at how God makes the impossible Possible.
My kids daily young ones and older ones are bringing situations into our family life that are not always God honouring and this causes me as their mom and nan upset but i turn it all into prayer because God is faithfull and what i cant do God can
isaiah 54 verse 13
" All thy children shall be taught of the Lord and great shall be the peace of thy children" believe in Gods word above everything and all will be well for your son, BUT must be done in Love and God is Love .
So be blessed sister and you've come to the right place here a wonderfull company of praying believing Saints x
God bless you and
God bless your son x
yours truly nic x

 

[Nicola Jane]

ill just add as plough boy said how old is your son?
if under 16 how has he bought this game into your home ,as me personally would not have allowed it into home in the first place but sometimes we are unaware of the content of these games we just focus on giving our kids what they want because we Love them not always a good idea in hindsight, id just explain why he cant have this type of game and a firm immovable No with an alternative game of yours and his choice. I learnt this through many battles with my kids and video games.
Dont even allow these bad games in your home no more take a stand and remove it he will cry and moan but replace with better things as talked about previously.
We buy our kids all the new things that are cool in their eyes and everybody else got it so they want it ,but its worldy pressure dont bow to it .Your son might not understand but he will in time if you both grow in the Lord he will grow out of these desires for the things of the world. I would just get game out house asap .
praying for you and your son x

 

[Mesrim]

First of all, beating ur kids is bad as it instills fear and not respect. For the main point there is nothing wrong with video games at all. Not only is it not real, but you just don’t have to except a redirect that you see. Like it just doesn’t make sense, it’s highly illogical. Not only this, but if you think you’re child won’t work around you, you must think again

 

[Mesrim]

My son likes to play games that come from Orientals and have women with large breasts and demonic animal features. They are turning him into a child-molesting animal worshipper. We have been very clear with him that he is not to play these games, but I have caught him doing it numerous times. I have beaten him every time I discovered him playing them thus far, but my husband has told me that my son is bruising badly and that it may be detrimental to us, or even to him. What should I do? What does the Lord say about disciplining children in these matters? I see no other way to teach him that these video games are evil.

First of all how’s old isn’t he. Second of all video games aren’t them the problem, I would much rather argue he’s just having problems with lust and will satisfy those desires. Lastly, if you beat him you’re encouraging him to not trust you

 

[Mesrim]

Hi Anna, lovely name, I came up against a similar problem regarding my children, but in those days it was role playing, rather than video games. The games they played weren't conducive to our faith and it worried me. Although the guy who took the role of game master had no interest in faith, my children had been brought up hearing the gospel. I pointed out that rather than playing role playing games, where the subject was pretence, they were in fact, already involved in spiritual warfare and the enemy was, through their games, working on them. That approach got them thinking and the games eventually petered out. I don't know if that approach will be of help to you, it is worth some prayer in that direction. It is important what Plough boy said regarding the age of your child, but if your son can understand the rules of the games, I'm praying that he might respond to an explanation of the book of Romans and Ephesians. It might be advantageous to you, to read up on spiritual warfare so your son can see that his mum is a warrior in a real spiritual war. Hope this is of help, bless you.

Ur crazy bro

 

[KittyLinda]

It is not going to be easy, but love is the answer. You do not say what age. Also, are these games explicitly about women and nudity? I'm a gamer, and most games are not like that, but some come with very horrible scenes. Every game tells you, if they can be played by those younger than 18, or not. Look it up.

When I was young, I liked Vampire TV shows, and my mother recognized the lust and the occult. She did not allow me to watch them. You can do that. Take the games or the the gaming device away, but I do not agree with beating your kids. You brought them into the world and this world is Satan's ground.

 

[Trevor]

Ur crazy bro

So Mesrim, My advice is crazy, what's yours?

 

[NYQueens977]

I'm not a mom, but I used to get beat a lot as a kid, so maybe I could give you some insight that the others haven't.

I struggle with anger, a lot of it. I love my mom to death, but I still feel bitterness whenever I think back to those days. Sometimes I would get hit for things I didn't do, but she thought I did. She denies it, probably forgot, but I haven't, and I know that I probably never will. I remember how I would cry my eyes out, begging her not to hurt me, as she averted her eyes from mine and calmly told me to bend over. I remember how confused I was when she told me classic line "this hurts me more than it hurts you". Yeah, that's why she doesn't remember half of the times she beat me, but I do.
It hurts all the more as my mom had more kids, and I see my siblings get away with things that I would've been beaten for without hesitation. It hurts me to my core hearing my mom of all people saying that she shouldn't hurt her kids, how she wants her kids to grow up to be able to stand up for themselves against adults, which was the very thing that I used to be beaten for when I was younger. I cry myself to sleep thinking how my mom literally beat the backbone out of me, and how, even now as an adult, I have to remind myself that I am my own person who doesn't have to take flak from adults, and I have to remind myself that hitting isn't an acceptable, even if I instinctually want to hit first and ask questions later whenever I'm angry or when someone pisses me off.
Even now, I can't talk to my mom normally about things that bother me because I used to get beat if I complained. From an early age she instilled in me the idea that I can never talk to her like a person. I mean, who was I to tell her if I was hurting, or if I didn't like something? I was the child and she was the adult, and adults are always right, even when they're wrong.

I'm telling you know, if you beat your kid, your kid will never forget it. Your kid will never be able to talk to you about anything, and they'll carry that pain with them for the rest of their lives. Even if you beg for their forgiveness, no amount of 'sorry's" or "I was wrong" will ever erase the pain inflicted to them by someone that was supposed to love and care for them the most.
If you don't want your kid playing video games, then please, for Godssakes, talk to them. And I mean actually talk to them, not like you're superior to them and they know nothing. Kids will know when you're talking down to them. I knew when my parents were talking down to me, and it doesn't feel good. Talk to them like how you would want someone to talk to you, because whether your kid is 8 or 18, no one likes to be talked down to. Explain how you feel about these games. Explain to them why you think those games are wrong, and lay down the ground rules: "If I catch you with these games, I'm going to confiscate them". Remind them that this is your house, and that, in anywhere really, there are rules that you need to follow, and if you don't follow them, that there are consequences. Maybe if you treat them like a person and stop beating them like an animal, they'll show more respect for you. I mean, how would you feel if someone started to beat you every time you stepped out of line? You wouldn't like it, so what makes you think that your kid does? And do you really want to strain your relationship with your kid over video games? It obviously doesn't work, so why don't you try treating them like a person? They're a person too. We are people too. And we don't like to get hit. No one does. Please, and this is to everyone who thinks that this is an acceptable form of punishment, and I tell you this as I type with tears in my eyes:

Don't hit your kids.

 

[KittyLinda]

It is never OK to beat you kids. I liked what Andy wrote " Please deal with him in the same way that you would want God, your father, to deal with you."

It is sad how some Christian parents go super harsh on their kids. I also got some of it and it turned me from God's way completely. My life is a mess and a lot of it has to do with how I was treated and rejected by my parents for sinning. Sorry but I'm going to say it; you also as a mom has no godly morals at all for beating your child. God deals with us even as kids when we sin against him. You are to guide only. Beating your kids is against the laws and we are told to obey them in the bible.

 

[Hekuran]

Often on TalkJesus someone joins, asks a single provocative and attention grabbing question, then is never heard of again.

Sadly, I suspect our advice is not being put to good use.

 

[Trevor]

It is never OK to beat you kids. I liked what Andy wrote " Please deal with him in the same way that you would want God, your father, to deal with you."

It is sad how some Christian parents go super harsh on their kids. I also got some of it and it turned me from God's way completely. My life is a mess and a lot of it has to do with how I was treated and rejected by my parents for sinning. Sorry but I'm going to say it; you also as a mom has no godly morals at all for beating your child. God deals with us even as kids when we sin against him. You are to guide only. Beating your kids is against the laws and we are told to obey them in the bible.

Proverbs 13:24 whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them. In my family, my children knew that I had my limits and that to pass them would likely end up with a smack. I can only remember smacking twice, my children honoured me, bless them.

 

[KittyLinda]

Proverbs 13:24 whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them. In my family, my children knew that I had my limits and that to pass them would likely end up with a smack. I can only remember smacking twice, my children honoured me, bless them.

Hmmm. I do not understand. Is it ok for her to give him bruises? I do not think so.

I’ve always trusted my dad because he never hits me, even when he is very angry, he may say things that make me tearful, but I know I’m ‘safe.’ I grew in fear because of my mother. Just like the OP, she is very extreme. She let my brother go homeless for nearly a month because he was dating a non-Christian girl in college. He failed all his courses that term. (third year student) then for a year he was not in college because she convinced my dad he needs to work to make up for the that year when she was the person who caused it in the first place. Many times, I’d be getting smacks. I only stare on the floor when it happens, but then I had enough of it, and I started saying very nasty things to her. I told her once I hated her. It is that moment she knew she could lose me forever and she changed a bit but the mistrust is still there. I avoid her at all costs. Often people blame the youth. We are told to respect the elderly, but if they are wrong, then it is a totally different story. Verbal abuse can be worse than physical abuse.

 

[Mesrim]

Ur crazy bro

So Mesrim, My advice is crazy, what's yours?

Video games are not inherently evil. When you blame the video game you get to do something called “not be a parent.” It’s not even real to begin with, these kind of beliefs are what drive people away from Christianity.

 

[Mesrim]

Ur crazy bro

I'm not a mom, but I used to get beat a lot as a kid, so maybe I could give you some insight that the others haven't.

I struggle with anger, a lot of it. I love my mom to death, but I still feel bitterness whenever I think back to those days. Sometimes I would get hit for things I didn't do, but she thought I did. She denies it, probably forgot, but I haven't, and I know that I probably never will. I remember how I would cry my eyes out, begging her not to hurt me, as she averted her eyes from mine and calmly told me to bend over. I remember how confused I was when she told me classic line "this hurts me more than it hurts you". Yeah, that's why she doesn't remember half of the times she beat me, but I do.
It hurts all the more as my mom had more kids, and I see my siblings get away with things that I would've been beaten for without hesitation. It hurts me to my core hearing my mom of all people saying that she shouldn't hurt her kids, how she wants her kids to grow up to be able to stand up for themselves against adults, which was the very thing that I used to be beaten for when I was younger. I cry myself to sleep thinking how my mom literally beat the backbone out of me, and how, even now as an adult, I have to remind myself that I am my own person who doesn't have to take flak from adults, and I have to remind myself that hitting isn't an acceptable, even if I instinctually want to hit first and ask questions later whenever I'm angry or when someone pisses me off.
Even now, I can't talk to my mom normally about things that bother me because I used to get beat if I complained. From an early age she instilled in me the idea that I can never talk to her like a person. I mean, who was I to tell her if I was hurting, or if I didn't like something? I was the child and she was the adult, and adults are always right, even when they're wrong.

I'm telling you know, if you beat your kid, your kid will never forget it. Your kid will never be able to talk to you about anything, and they'll carry that pain with them for the rest of their lives. Even if you beg for their forgiveness, no amount of 'sorry's" or "I was wrong" will ever erase the pain inflicted to them by someone that was supposed to love and care for them the most.
If you don't want your kid playing video games, then please, for Godssakes, talk to them. And I mean actually talk to them, not like you're superior to them and they know nothing. Kids will know when you're talking down to them. I knew when my parents were talking down to me, and it doesn't feel good. Talk to them like how you would want someone to talk to you, because whether your kid is 8 or 18, no one likes to be talked down to. Explain how you feel about these games. Explain to them why you think those games are wrong, and lay down the ground rules: "If I catch you with these games, I'm going to confiscate them". Remind them that this is your house, and that, in anywhere really, there are rules that you need to follow, and if you don't follow them, that there are consequences. Maybe if you treat them like a person and stop beating them like an animal, they'll show more respect for you. I mean, how would you feel if someone started to beat you every time you stepped out of line? You wouldn't like it, so what makes you think that your kid does? And do you really want to strain your relationship with your kid over video games? It obviously doesn't work, so why don't you try treating them like a person? They're a person too. We are people too. And we don't like to get hit. No one does. Please, and this is to everyone who thinks that this is an acceptable form of punishment, and I tell you this as I type with tears in my eyes:

Don't hit your kids.

Exactly, it’s barbaric