I've been struggling with forgiving myself

[Lev]

Re: Cturtle

Thank you very much!

 

[Lev]

Re: Wired 4 Fishen

Hi.
Thanks for preaching.

 

[Chopper]

Hi there Lev. I'm a Christian Psychologist and have counseled quite a few folk in similar situations as you. I will give you a suggestion, and if you want more counseling, I'd be honored to give it to you. Presently I am counseling other folk in other Forums but will make time for you if you wish.

I have found that many boys/men who are attracted to girls/women for a relationship that is more serious than just friends will be a permanent relationship. Now the trouble with a Hollywood love is it's not really love, because it lacks commitment. Love is a fleeting emotion. If sex enters in, the emotion is not true love. Sex presents a false love because it is all about self satisfaction. When the satisfaction gets old, the so-called love is gone, and so is the relationship. So what you and this girl have experienced is not new. Your sadness and guilt is not new either.

So what would I recommend for you to do? I'm glad you asked, for a million dollars I'll tell you. Ha, just kidding! I hope you have a sense of humor because God made monkeys and me.

I believe that you and this girl entered a wonderful relationship that lasted just a short time. And it can be even more wonderful if you two hook up again, only this time enjoy your relationship the way that Jesus has designed for you two. Both of you have the potential to have a real love experience, not a Hollywood one. Jesus can, if you two are willing, to have a romance that will lead you into exactly what you are waiting for. There is a way, it's not impossible for God.

If you think that I'm way off the wall, don't respond, except to say, forget it looser. If you desire more counsel, I'd be glad and honored to help you.

 

[Lev]

Re: Chopper

I'm glad when I find people like you. I mean.. Thank you that you care.
I think I started to get over all these things. . I need to move on. That's what I need.
I started to think that it's okay when we learn from our own experiences.

Scripture says that God is love.
Scripture also says, „No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them to me“ John 6:44
And that we love. .because he first loved us!
You are a psychologist and you know these things better and how it works. .
I think love is not something that we control. .for God is love.
Maximum. .all we can do is to respect. .
And my problem is not that I stopped loving her. . my problem is that I had no courage to say „No“ before there was a chance for me to end that relationship normally.
Now I know. .

 

[Ophel]

When married (by the church or the government) couples get divorced, Christians are really sorry for them. And they pray for them. And even if they won't make getting back together, Christians still love 'em.
But when it comes to people like me, phrases like these comes into your minds „Are you a born again?“ „Is she immoral than you?“
-Stop it, you guys.
Sometimes people change and everything within them - changes too. It happens.
If any of you have something valuable to share, share.
If not, then walk away.

Even when reality hits and the "puppy love" one had seems to turn cold, the fact remains---you have taken on an act of marriage but not the commitment. Loving someone in a relationship like marriage is an act of the will, and not the happenstance of feelings.

Being married for nearly 40 years, I know that both my husband and I do not "feel" love 24/7 for each other, but we have made a vow to God and to each other to love each other until death parts us.

Love is a verb, and a decision.

However, that said, if you both do not have Jesus Christ in your life, then you cannot be held to the same call to righteous behaviour.

 

[Lev]

„Everyone who drinks of this water will thirst again. .“ -said Jesus to the Samaritan woman.
If one has skills to see through the context, one must see that Jesus was talking about earthly love. And that we, the mere humans, cannot satisfy one another - completely.
The whole purpose of earthly marriages is to let us see a shadow of what heavenly marriage is like. And heavenly love. Yes, the death will part all the couples of the universe. Because we are not the true water which satisfies the soul.
It's not a big deal to admit when you are thirsty, and to admit when you really want to be alone.
And if the person right next to you really loves you, he must be happy to let you go.
And I'm talking about Christians. And especially about Christians. For they are the ones, who claim that all the people belong to God, and God alone.
You can decide to spend your whole life with a person you love, and you can make him decide to spend his whole life with you by the holy matrimony with a vow. . but you cannot control his spirit. You should know that he belongs to God, and God alone. And if the day comes, when the only thing between you and him is that vow, you can just say „Thank you for all these beautiful moments that you gave me.“ hug him and let him go.

 

[Chopper]

Re: Chopper

I'm glad when I find people like you. I mean.. Thank you that you care.
I think I started to get over all these things. . I need to move on. That's what I need.
I started to think that it's okay when we learn from our own experiences.

Scripture says that God is love.
Scripture also says, „No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them to me“ John 6:44
And that we love. .because he first loved us!
You are a psychologist and you know these things better and how it works. .
I think love is not something that we control. .for God is love.
Maximum. .all we can do is to respect. .
And my problem is not that I stopped loving her. . my problem is that I had no courage to say „No“ before there was a chance for me to end that relationship normally.
Now I know. .

Ok my new friend, I'm here if you need me. Love you!

 

[Ophel]

„Everyone who drinks of this water will thirst again. .“ -said Jesus to the Samaritan woman.
If one has skills to see through the context, one must see that Jesus was talking about earthly love. And that we, the mere humans, cannot satisfy one another - completely.
The whole purpose of earthly marriages is to let us see a shadow of what heavenly marriage is like. And heavenly love. Yes, the death will part all the couples of the universe. Because we are not the true water which satisfies the soul.
It's not a big deal to admit when you are thirsty, and to admit when you really want to be alone.
And if the person right next to you really loves you, he must be happy to let you go.
And I'm talking about Christians. And especially about Christians. For they are the ones, who claim that all the people belong to God, and God alone.
You can decide to spend your whole life with a person you love, and you can make him decide to spend his whole life with you by the holy matrimony with a vow. . but you cannot control his spirit. You should know that he belongs to God, and God alone. And if the day comes, when the only thing between you and him is that vow, you can just say „Thank you for all these beautiful moments that you gave me.“ hug him and let him go.

That is human thinking. Like God, we are to keep our vows. Marriage is a serious matter.

 

[Lev]

„But I say to you, make no oath at all!“ -Matthew 5:34

See? : ))))

 

[Lev]

It's religious tradition to promise something by making an oath. Yet, It's totally unbiblical.

„Put no trust in a neighbor; have no confidence in a friend; guard the doors of your mouth from her who lies in your arms; for the son treats the father with contempt, the daughter rises up against her mother, the daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law; a man's enemies are the men of his own house.“ -Micah 7:5-6

Isn't it something so badly real? Did I make it up?

 

[Ophel]

It's religious tradition to promise something by making an oath. Yet, It's totally unbiblical.

„Put no trust in a neighbor; have no confidence in a friend; guard the doors of your mouth from her who lies in your arms; for the son treats the father with contempt, the daughter rises up against her mother, the daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law; a man's enemies are the men of his own house.“ -Micah 7:5-6

Isn't it something so badly real? Did I make it up?

Yes, you did. Plus you cherry pick scriptures without knowledge of them. Micah is prophesying there about the coming conditions of the end times and the judgments of the Tribulation period yet to come.

1 Corinthians 7:8-9; 36-38
8 So I say to those who aren’t married and to widows—it’s better to stay unmarried, just as I am. 9 But if they can’t control themselves, they should go ahead and marry. It’s better to marry than to burn with lust.

36 But if a man thinks that he’s treating his fiancée improperly and will inevitably give in to his passion, let him marry her as he wishes. It is not a sin. 37 But if he has decided firmly not to marry and there is no urgency and he can control his passion, he does well not to marry. 38 So the person who marries his fiancée does well, and the person who doesn’t marry does even better.

Mark 10:6-9
6 But ‘God made them male and female from the beginning of creation. 7 ‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, 8 and the two are united into one. Since they are no longer two but one, 9 let no one split apart what God has joined together.”

 

[Chad]

It's religious tradition to promise something by making an oath. Yet, It's totally unbiblical.

„Put no trust in a neighbor; have no confidence in a friend; guard the doors of your mouth from her who lies in your arms; for the son treats the father with contempt, the daughter rises up against her mother, the daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law; a man's enemies are the men of his own house.“ -Micah 7:5-6

Isn't it something so badly real? Did I make it up?

Seems to me by this post and a handful of other responses you've made in this thread, you don't take God's Word seriously. You seem to toss it around with disregard for their meanings in context.

This type of attitude towards God's Word is spiritual danger, to put it lightly. You've made a few responses also that come off sarcastic. Not a good thing when you're asking for help.

 

[Lev]

Re: Chad

Yea, sometimes I don't take God's word seriously because it makes me too happy to be sad and serious. So what? As a child of God, I can enjoy with my Royal identity in Jesus Christ.
My identity is hidden with him. I cannot do anything to make him stop lovin me.
Yes, I like to read the scripture with or without context. I can make as many mistakes as I want to. Be happy behalf of me. Did God tell you that he doesn't like my attitude towards him?
Did he tell you that i'm in a spiritually dangerous place?
Sarcastic? -I think it's kinda cool. (Not many people can do that.)
But hey, what do you say about you judging me? Ain't you afraid that you'll be judged just like you've judged me?
What if you're sarcastic too? what if you cannot read in context better than me? What if you are the one, in a spiritually dangerous place?

 

[Chad]

Re: Chad

Yea, sometimes I don't take God's word seriously because it makes me too happy to be sad and serious. So what? As a child of God, I can enjoy with my Royal identity in Jesus Christ.
My identity is hidden with him. I cannot do anything to make him stop lovin me.
Yes, I like to read the scripture with or without context. I can make as many mistakes as I want to. Be happy behalf of me. Did God tell you that he doesn't like my attitude towards him?
Did he tell you that i'm in a spiritually dangerous place?
Sarcastic? -I think it's kinda cool. (Not many people can do that.)
But hey, what do you say about you judging me? Ain't you afraid that you'll be judged just like you've judged me?
What if you're sarcastic too? what if you cannot read in context better than me? What if you are the one, in a spiritually dangerous place?

Your post here says a lot about your attitude. But if you continue being disrespectful and post childish things like this, expect your account to be closed.

 

[Lev]

Do you know why was Jesus hangin out with the cowards and the ******?
When the Kingdom comes, how can it be, that the prostitutes are the ones who get there before anybody?

 

[Lev]

W hore is a biblical word. Why was that hidden here?

 

[Chad]

Do you know why was Jesus hangin out with the cowards and the ******?
When the Kingdom comes, how can it be, that the prostitutes are the ones who get there before anybody?

What on earth are you babbling about? You've done this ample times in this thread, gone astray from your original post. Seriously Lev, take a break. I've already warned you once.

 

[Lev]

Why do you care if i gone astray from my original post? Isn't life more than these?
I asked if you knew why was Jesus hangin out with them and I asked many things up there, but you gave no answer. There's something in you that causes you to be like that.
You're protecting God from me? What is it that bothers you?
Are you happy that you're in control here to give people warnings and block them?
You shouldn't be Admin. You're using your powers as you want.

 

[Fragrant Grace]

@Lev

Your attitude is intolerable
You have been given sound loving advice and just made a joke of it
You have been warned and heeded by brother Chad and taken no notice.

Take your problems to the Lord in prayer and seek Him seriously and He will not fail you.
But don't mess around here

 

[Chad]

Why do you care if i gone astray from my original post? Isn't life more than these?
I asked if you knew why was Jesus hangin out with them and I asked many things up there, but you gave no answer. There's something in you that causes you to be like that.
You're protecting God from me? What is it that bothers you?
Are you happy that you're in control here to give people warnings and block them?
You shouldn't be Admin. You're using your powers as you want.

Ignorance exemplified. Thank you.