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So men indeed choose ******* over decent women

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Of course like anyone I would love a partner. I get scared sometimes always being alone but I also refuse to make the mistakes of my past again. I trust if the Lord wants to bring a godly man into my life he will. Does that make me jaded or just willing to accept the fallen world we live in?

I don't have the answer for you. But I feel if you have the desire to be married, God wants this for you as well. The Bible doesn't say we have to be married, but I do notice that after God says "it is good" six times during creation.. the first time He
says "it is not good" was because man was alone, and had no mate. ( Gen 2:18; ) Marriage was consecrated by God. ( Gen 2:24; ).

I will say physical sin is just as bad as 'mental' sin. All sin is sin, plain and simple. The Bible speaks against fornication in over a dozen places. Still, you can repent. I myself have been down that road many many years ago. It didn't go well for me, ( I am divorced )
and it took many years for me to overcome the baggage of all that. I have been married for a long time now and things are going much better in that area now. It's easy to fall into the trap of justifying sin.

1Cor 7:8; But I say to the unmarried and to widows that it is good for them if they remain even as I.
1Cor 7:9; But if they do not have self-control, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

I know it's hard to be patient, but I know if you are God will reward you.
 
Ok, lets try this, we all are born sinners, and what do sinners do? They sin. Now, once we are "born from above" we become a new creature, a child of God. And we begin to learn how to live that life. babes in Christ Jesus, now how do we learn, by reading, and by other christians. We trust in them to show us the way. In this process we run into everything, and every kind of "school of thoughts" pertaining to the christian life. Finally we realize, it is the written word is our guide, turning not to the left or right. And we find out, it is His "will " not our will is to be done. We are called to deny ourselves. And then we learn what the will of God is for our life, everyone one of us, and that will is "our sanctification"! Through all the worldly expectations of grandeur of a "Christian" lifestyle, we learn is false, and the calling is far greater than we could ever had expected, the great-ness is beyond even the realms of "Heaven", that is what the Quote of "Holy Scripture" is all about:

For this is the will of God for you:
For this is the will of God, your sanctification:b that you abstain from sexual immorality; 4that each one of you know how to control his own bodyc in holiness and honor, 5not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God; 6that no one transgress and wrong his brother in this matter, because the Lord is an avenger in all these things, as we told you beforehand and solemnly warned you. 7For God has not called us for impurity, but in holiness. 8Therefore whoever disregards this, disregards not man but God, who gives his Holy Spirit to you.

And God will show you the True Treasure of God., and you will see, He will show you. But you must travel the Highway of Holiness through Sanctification.
This pathway is not easy, for there are only a few that travels this path and the road is narrow and hard, But you can make it, for many are called but a few are chosen. That is why Jesus said: "whosoever does not love me more than "mother, father, sister, brother, husband , wives, sons and daughters or his own life cannot be my disciple" you get the message.
This is what it means to seek the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and all things will be added unto you.

Isaiah 65:17
For behold, I will create new heavens and a new earth. The former things will not be remembered, nor will they come to mind.

James 1:12
Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love Him.

(1 Corinthians 2)
9But as it is written, Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him.
10But God hath revealed them unto us by his Spirit: for the Spirit searcheth all things, yea, the deep things of God. 11For what man knoweth the things of a man, save the spirit of man which is in him? even so the things of God knoweth no man, but the Spirit of God. 12Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the spirit which is of God; that we might know the things that are freely given to us of God. 13Which things also we speak, not in the words which man's wisdom teacheth, but which the Holy Ghost teacheth; comparing spiritual things with spiritual.

PS. from Genesis to The Book of Revelation, can you find one happy marriage in there? And what is a "Godly man" or a godly woman" we all are mess-up! And if you decide that you want to marry. That is your choice, and you both will find out how Ungodly you both are! for the spirit of God will reveal it unto you! For your sanctification is a process. And a true Child of GOD has 3 enemies that God himself has created for you: (The World, The devil and The Flesh) and they take no prisoners! (The fight is unto the death). Marriage is a warfare, for the children of GOD! and it has many of casualties.

My advice, pick up your Bible and embrace it, and Love it, like you never love anything in your life and hold it tight. And let no man or woman separate you from its contents. for these times are dangerous and seems like Our Savior is at the door! we have some dark times ahead, and many will be darker than others. yes sometimes you are going to be lonely, yes sometimes fear will slip in, yes sometimes you are going to cry, yes sometimes you are going to feel like you don't have a friend in the whole world. and times it will get dark, but "they who sat in darkness saw a great light" The darker the night the BRIGHTER the stars" But you cannot not live any kind of way you want too, to see the brightness of the light and the true comforts of the presence of His touch.

Sorry for being long winded.
Shalom.
 
If we look at social media or tinder apps, OLD dating, we have a sample size of data. Its not pretty. Apps read, "proud single mom," or "something casual" when in teens or twenties. Conveniently, when 30 or nearly this tune changes. Fast! While I believe in God and forgiveness, I am no sucker. Its simply not easy despite the abundance of options. I wish the church was more open to helping people out there. Pick wise. There's no do overs as the clock keeps ticking. There's a significant difference between the girl on the Early side of twenty talking marriage and kids versus the girl at thirty plus who is done with the bad boys and thinks i should man up.
 
Finding a Godly woman in this city is next to impossible. Narcissism is rife here, I have met so many of them over the years. Fortunalty for me I am an introvert, empath and very independent. I dont like being reliant on any other person. But these narcissist have certainly put me off even trying to find a beloved. And yes, my parents were both narcissists. We hardly had a loving household thats for sure.
 
Finding a Godly woman in this city is next to impossible. Narcissism is rife here, I have met so many of them over the years. Fortunalty for me I am an introvert, empath and very independent. I dont like being reliant on any other person. But these narcissist have certainly put me off even trying to find a beloved. And yes, my parents were both narcissists. We hardly had a loving household thats for sure.

There's that Ephesians passage of a virtuous woman. I've never seen this in the modern era. I see a lot more women showing up with Chad or Tyrones kids. I see a culture of hedonism. I have no interest in marrying the girl who spent her youth being a booty call. Its cuckoldry. No thanks. I am dating now but I don't hold my breathe. A lot of women want to get married. They don't want to be a wife. Many want kids but they don't want to be a mother and raise them. Even worse, an appalling amount of divorce initiated by women. Follow the trail of money. Look at the abundance of marriage men on Internet porn because the wife stopped sex. The churches continue to shift onus on men to step up but i don't see marriageable women in the west. Marrying hot dog down a hallway is gross.

The church is full of young men. Very few if any young women. I met the few who are tgere haha. Its just not a good time for marriage anymore.
 
There's that Ephesians passage of a virtuous woman. I've never seen this in the modern era. I see a lot more women showing up with Chad or Tyrones kids. I see a culture of hedonism. I have no interest in marrying the girl who spent her youth being a booty call. Its cuckoldry. No thanks. I am dating now but I don't hold my breathe. A lot of women want to get married. They don't want to be a wife. Many want kids but they don't want to be a mother and raise them. Even worse, an appalling amount of divorce initiated by women. Follow the trail of money. Look at the abundance of marriage men on Internet porn because the wife stopped sex. The churches continue to shift onus on men to step up but i don't see marriageable women in the west. Marrying hot dog down a hallway is gross.

The church is full of young men. Very few if any young women. I met the few who are tgere haha. Its just not a good time for marriage anymore.

I don't see this as a marriageable age either. The virtues of marriage are no longer in existence. People look for partners who are sensual, flirty and charming even if they are covert narcissists, sociopaths and psychopaths. They don't bother to test the character of those they marry and love and then end up getting used and abused. I have even read of news where men kill women in revenge after they got used by the women they loved - its infuriating to read.

Meanwhile, women like me who remain a virgin and want to be a godly wife don't have a godly man in my life. It is supposed to be the man who seeks a wife, not the woman. But men have ran after seductresses who have slept around and behave like dogs to please and love manipulative and attention seeking women because they give men sexual and sensual pleasures. Meanwhile those quiet women in the corner who don't flirt, who don't seek attention but actually has the potential to be a good wife are seen as boring, dull and get left out or worse, used by PUAs. I have lost all faith in marrying anyone in this age seeing this is how men decide who to love and chase, and it makes my blood boil.
 
I don't see this as a marriageable age either. The virtues of marriage are no longer in existence. People look for partners who are sensual, flirty and charming even if they are covert narcissists, sociopaths and psychopaths. They don't bother to test the character of those they marry and love and then end up getting used and abused. I have even read of news where men kill women in revenge after they got used by the women they loved - its infuriating to read.

Meanwhile, women like me who remain a virgin and want to be a godly wife don't have a godly man in my life. It is supposed to be the man who seeks a wife, not the woman. But men have ran after seductresses who have slept around and behave like dogs to please and love manipulative and attention seeking women because they give men sexual and sensual pleasures. Meanwhile those quiet women in the corner who don't flirt, who don't seek attention but actually has the potential to be a good wife are seen as boring, dull and get left out or worse, used by PUAs. I have lost all faith in marrying anyone in this age seeing this is how men decide who to love and chase, and it makes my blood boil.
"Meanwhile those quiet women in the corner who don't flirt, who don't seek attention but actually has the potential to be a good wife are seen as boring, dull and get left out" This goes for men as well, me in particular, since High School. Rejected because I am quiet, Godly, I sew and go on road trips, dont believe in the values and ethics of this world, particulalry prosperity theology. So therefore I am rejected time and time again.
 
I don't see this as a marriageable age either. The virtues of marriage are no longer in existence. People look for partners who are sensual, flirty and charming even if they are covert narcissists, sociopaths and psychopaths. They don't bother to test the character of those they marry and love and then end up getting used and abused. I have even read of news where men kill women in revenge after they got used by the women they loved - its infuriating to read.

Meanwhile, women like me who remain a virgin and want to be a godly wife don't have a godly man in my life. It is supposed to be the man who seeks a wife, not the woman. But men have ran after seductresses who have slept around and behave like dogs to please and love manipulative and attention seeking women because they give men sexual and sensual pleasures. Meanwhile those quiet women in the corner who don't flirt, who don't seek attention but actually has the potential to be a good wife are seen as boring, dull and get left out or worse, used by PUAs. I have lost all faith in marrying anyone in this age seeing this is how men decide who to love and chase, and it makes my blood boil.

I am guilty there. I approach a lot. The lens on which I view the world is that, God helps those who help themselves. I am not passive about it. At the same time, if a woman doesn't make any efforts or anything that suggests interet, it is assumed that she's disinterested.
I will pull back all attention and allocate it elsewhere. Not as a tactic. As self preservation.

I do understand what you said. There's a truth there. Men want a baddie. They want a girl who is hot and young even if she's not committed or wifey. Just for now. After church, i talked with my buddy. We both described the same thing. There's a girl at church. I am talking and seeing another. Unfortunately I have seen enough to know that the majority of people are far from church. My church is mostly young men. I wish more women went. Its annoying tbh.

I just seen a Steve W. Vid about a girl who cucked her bf pretending 2 kids were his. DNA said otherwise. As disgusting as this is, the boys mother told him to man up. GTFO. WORST MOTHER EVER. Even worse when the kid isn't even 18 and he's told by his MOTHER to be a cuckold.

There's a reason for men wanting purity. It's non existent in the modern world. It don't matter if its apps or the church, a lot of women are on the carousel when young. Waiting at 30 for some beta. No dice.

Oprah and feminism had lied to women.

It should not be tjis hard if your a catch. I must ask, are you overweight? You can be sweet and caring but overweight is a huge deal breaker.
 
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"Meanwhile those quiet women in the corner who don't flirt, who don't seek attention but actually has the potential to be a good wife are seen as boring, dull and get left out" This goes for men as well, me in particular, since High School. Rejected because I am quiet, Godly, I sew and go on road trips, dont believe in the values and ethics of this world, particulalry prosperity theology. So therefore I am rejected time and time again.

I went to a Christian school. Tons of single moms, girls getting their back blown out, and now social media is a pity party. Victimhood.

I always assumed that I would get married. I am having fun and enjoying my life. I approach and I make space for women. Young. Petite. Attractive. Fit. If she doesn't want kids or marriage i am disinterested.

You must take OWNERSHIP. Women can get away with victimhood (when young and hot). For us men, it's a bad look. Don't do this. Play your hand.

If i see a attractive young woman at the gym or church, i am going to talk to her. If we have chemistry, i will extend something to the respect of a rsvp. She can come with or get left behind. Its not pc but truth be told, its a numbers game. Approach. Talk. Turn on the charm. Flirt. Have fun.

Shocking. The cute girl next door is misbehaving at night. She has her fantasy and most fellas are low testosterone or too beta to approach. The guys who do approach are typically the sort to blow her back out and drop her off at 30. She is never getting a chance because you won't make a move. Being socially inept wasn't cute in college or high school. Its even more important as your getting older. I like the fight club quotes. I want you to hit me as hard as you can. I don't want to die without any scars. Life favors the bold.

I always wanted to meet a girl a5 church so, i approached a cute girl at church. I thought she was m6 guardian angel. She's not so i guess she's fair game. Hah
 
The description of a virtuous woman hits it nail on.
I was thinking that those who proclaim themselves such, wanting to find a worthwhile mate, should list what they think they should have as attributes, not just what they expect out of the opposite sex.
 
"Meanwhile those quiet women in the corner who don't flirt, who don't seek attention but actually has the potential to be a good wife are seen as boring, dull and get left out" This goes for men as well, me in particular, since High School. Rejected because I am quiet, Godly, I sew and go on road trips, dont believe in the values and ethics of this world, particulalry prosperity theology. So therefore I am rejected time and time again.

But the onus is more on men to exercise self control as the spiritual leader. Women who select bad boys usually have bad fathers but are naive and kind and more vulnerable to exploitation as the weaker gender.

The Bible is littered with warnings to men (and not women) to run away from seductresses and women who use female charms, flirting, outer beauty, makeup to lure men into their seductive traps. Men nowadays pay no heed to biblical warnings so they reap the consequences of seeking pleasures. Meanwhile, women who are actually pious and reserved are robbed of chances of ever marrying decent men because decent men don't even pick them anymore and are drawn to sensual but wicked women - this angers me a lot when I think about it.
 
Can you list all the attributes of a Godly, decent woman?

Don't flirt with men, AT ALL
Don't sleep with men, unless in a marriage
Reserved and quiet (rather than attention seeking)
Don't use curse words on a regular basis
Don't use men for money and pleasure

The above are not all the attributes of a decent woman but it is attributes I DON'T find in women who are usually popular with men. And yet men chase after them and adore them as queens. Its disgusting.
 
I am guilty there. I approach a lot. The lens on which I view the world is that, God helps those who help themselves. I am not passive about it. At the same time, if a woman doesn't make any efforts or anything that suggests interet, it is assumed that she's disinterested.
I will pull back all attention and allocate it elsewhere. Not as a tactic. As self preservation.

I do understand what you said. There's a truth there. Men want a baddie. They want a girl who is hot and young even if she's not committed or wifey. Just for now. After church, i talked with my buddy. We both described the same thing. There's a girl at church. I am talking and seeing another. Unfortunately I have seen enough to know that the majority of people are far from church. My church is mostly young men. I wish more women went. Its annoying tbh.

I just seen a Steve W. Vid about a girl who cucked her bf pretending 2 kids were his. DNA said otherwise. As disgusting as this is, the boys mother told him to man up. GTFO. WORST MOTHER EVER. Even worse when the kid isn't even 18 and he's told by his MOTHER to be a cuckold.

There's a reason for men wanting purity. It's non existent in the modern world. It don't matter if its apps or the church, a lot of women are on the carousel when young. Waiting at 30 for some beta. No dice.

Oprah and feminism had lied to women.

It should not be tjis hard if your a catch. I must ask, are you overweight? You can be sweet and caring but overweight is a huge deal breaker.

Not a single biblical women in the Bible went about their lives dressing up and going out to parties seeking men to marry, it was men who came to them. Only the prostitutes and women whom the Bible said men should run away from were using female charms to attract men. By female charms I am not talking about the natural physical beauty, I am talking about all the flirting techniques taught by so called relationship gurus and deliberate actions of women to seduce men into satisfying their demands - the Bible never approved of women who do these things, they are wicked by biblical definition. Jezebel is one such wicked woman full of female charms, if not for her charms she could not have influenced Israel's king to worship false gods.

Every godly women in the Bible I read of was reserved, remained a virgin until marriage and simply went about their daily duties until men came into their lives and married them. They never bothered to dress up or learn flirting techniques.

I have men who are interested in me almost everywhere I go and boys were telling me they like me when I was still in elementary school, but none of them even fit the godly man criteria. They only look at the surface of a person and they are soon drawn away by sensual women. So they show interest in me but after seeing how reserved I am irl they gravitate towards women who are attention seeking and flirtatious - why would I want to marry men who are so easily seduced by other women and can't make up their minds to stay loyal with a woman they actually like?

What has all this got to do with being overweight? Some women like my cousin are overweight because of the medicine they take, if that is a dealbreaker, then good riddance. If a man truly loves a woman, overweight means absolutely nothing. But like I said, this is not a marriageable age, most men (and women) are in relationships/marriage for the sensual pleasures, not for biblical love. The worst of the last days are upon us, people are pleasure seeking just like apostle Paul prophesied.
 
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Not a single biblical women in the Bible went about their lives dressing up and going out to parties seeking men to marry, it was men who came to them. Only the prostitutes and women whom the Bible said men should run away from were using female charms to attract men. By female charms I am not talking about the natural physical beauty, I am talking about all the flirting techniques taught by so called relationship gurus and deliberate actions of women to seduce men into satisfying their demands - the Bible never approved of women who do these things, they are wicked by biblical definition. Jezebel is one such wicked woman full of female charms, if not for her charms she could not have influenced Israel's king to worship false gods.

Every godly women in the Bible I read of was reserved, remained a virgin until marriage and simply went about their daily duties until men came into their lives and married them. They never bothered to dress up or learn flirting techniques.

I have men who are interested in me almost everywhere I go and boys were telling me they like me when I was still in elementary school, but none of them even fit the godly man criteria. They only look at the surface of a person and they are soon drawn away by sensual women. So they show interest in me but after seeing how reserved I am irl they gravitate towards women who are attention seeking and flirtatious - why would I want to marry men who are so easily seduced by other women and can't make up their minds to stay loyal with a woman they actually like?

What has all this got to do with being overweight? Some women like my cousin are overweight because of the medicine they take, if that is a dealbreaker, then good riddance. If a man truly loves a woman, overweight means absolutely nothing. But like I said, this is not a marriageable age, most men (and women) are in relationships/marriage for the sensual pleasures, not for biblical love. The worst of the last days are upon us, people are pleasure seeking just like apostle Paul prophesied.
Birds of a feather flock together. I believe that is what happened with your friend, so sorry.
 
I am guilty there. I approach a lot. The lens on which I view the world is that, God helps those who help themselves. I am not passive about it. At the same time, if a woman doesn't make any efforts or anything that suggests interet, it is assumed that she's disinterested.
I will pull back all attention and allocate it elsewhere. Not as a tactic. As self preservation.

Why would a woman show interest in a man if a man isn't showing interest in her first, unless she is just seeking attention? And there is a difference between showing genuine romantic interest in you as a person and showing romantic interest to exploit you.

Ask YOURSELF, what kind of woman will show romantic interest in you when she doesn't even know you well? How can she develop true feelings for you when she hasn't even gotten to know you as a person? You shouldn't be surprised if you are dating a bad woman who is out to suck you dry and exploit you when you are so quick to accept ANY sort of romantic interest in you.

My view is that if a man is showing interest in me I would evaluate his character and his conduct for a good long while BEFORE I even show any actual romantic interest. To do otherwise is to lower my boundaries as a decent woman. Just because I am not showing romantic interest in a man for a period of time does not mean he cannot go on to chase me. He should be evaluating my character and conduct just as I am evaluating him BEFORE any romance even takes place.

To dive headlong into romance without getting to know a person is foolishness, and pulling back attention just because a person isn't showing romantic interest in the beginning is just as foolish. The first choice makes you more prone to dating bad women, the second choice makes you more prone to miss out on decent women. Judge for yourself whether I speak the truth.

It should not be tjis hard if your a catch. I must ask, are you overweight? You can be sweet and caring but overweight is a huge deal breaker.

Just so you know, overweight had nothing to do with anything. It is hard for me to find a spouse because I cannot even picture myself with a man who is not a virgin. I kept myself a virgin for thirty years, why would I marry a man who has used his hands and lips to touch other women? Voices around me have all been telling me that finding a virgin man is next to impossible in this age, so I'm done with marriage. I will die a virgin FOR JESUS.
 
Why would a woman show interest in a man if a man isn't showing interest in her first, unless she is just seeking attention? And there is a difference between showing genuine romantic interest in you as a person and showing romantic interest to exploit you. Ask YOURSELF, what kind of woman will show romantic interest in you when she doesn't even know you well? How can she develop true feelings for you when she hasn't even gotten to know you as a person? You shouldn't be surprised if you are dating a bad woman who is out to suck you dry and exploit you when you are so quick to accept ANY sort of romantic interest in you.

My view is that if a man is showing interest in me I would evaluate his character and his conduct for a good long while BEFORE I even show any actual romantic interest. To do otherwise is to lower my boundaries as a decent woman. Just because I am not showing romantic interest in a man for a period of time does not mean he cannot go on to chase me. He should be evaluating my character and conduct just as I am evaluating him BEFORE any romance even takes place.

To dive headlong into romance without getting to know a person is foolishness, and pulling back attention just because a person isn't showing romantic interest at the outset more is just as foolish. The first makes you more prone to dating bad women, the second makes you more prone to miss out on decent women. Judge yourself whether I speak the truth.



Just so you know, overweight had nothing to do with anything. It is hard for me because I cannot even picture myself with a man who has slept around with another woman before marriage. I kept myself a virgin for thirty years, why would I marry a man who has used his hands and lips to touch other women? Voices around me have all been telling me that finding a virgin man is next to impossible in this age, so I'm done with marriage. I will die a virgin FOR JESUS.
This seems strange to me. All the issues you are raising stand on their own. I don't think they should be defining relationships that require an open door and heart right at the onset, which is literally the gate of your priceless personal sanctity to which you alone hold the key. If someone exuded warmth towards you under what conditions and in what manner would you receive it? This is a difficult weight for you to carry around if I am reading this right. I don't like to see people in pain or burdened but I do know from personal experience that not all weight is visible or felt by the person who is carrying it. This is actually an intimate thing for you to discuss in anything besides an antiseptic way and it is not really an antiseptic topic. I hope you have a real friend with wisdom you can open up to. Not all men who exhibit kindness are after something other than the joy of the expression. Anyway, there are many people reading your post and I would venture that most all sympathize with your feelings and position. May God Bless and Guide you.
 
This seems strange to me. All the issues you are raising stand on their own. I don't think they should be defining relationships that require an open door and heart right at the onset, which is literally the gate of your priceless personal sanctity to which you alone hold the key. If someone exuded warmth towards you under what conditions and in what manner would you receive it?

My response was directed mainly for my disagreement with the points raised and as a retaliation for the mockery I sensed coming from the other side. They think I am so frustrated with relationships because I have some sort of defect that prevents me from finding a spouse, but they are all wrong.

Just like Lot is tormented in his soul witnessing all the evil done in Sodom and Gomorrah, I am likewise burdened and indignant about the corruption of relationships and marriages by a pleasure seeking generation. For the actions of a sinful lot, even those who remained virgins are robbed of having a godly and pure marriage intended by God. Why can’t I be angry about that?

I am totally fed up with this generation and have been forced to give up on something I hold very dear. To not be bitter about this is next to impossible.
 
Voices around me have all been telling me that finding a virgin man is next to impossible in this age, so I'm done with marriage. I will die a virgin FOR JESUS.

There are many religious men and women who are virgin, but do not know Jesus.

There are those who sinned, but repented, and now follow Jesus, and obey the Word of God on this. It is God's mercy.
 
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